HAPPENINGS

Writefreak Blogs Again; Who Do I say I Am?

2011-09-30T13:00:00.004+01:00

Say what? I thought she was gone for good...

Hmmm, I thought so too. For some reason, I've been so engrossed in being a wife, a mom, an entrepreneur, a home maker that blogging hasnt been high on my list of priorities. A few times, I actually came here and then I silently went back out. I didn't know what to write. Yep, Writefreak, didn't know what to write! How ironic! I'm not out of ideas, it's just been tedious putting it together.
Maybe I'm back fully, maybe I'm not, I dont know. But it's my space and I can come as I wish, I think....Thanks to a friend who reminded me on yahoo messenger that I'm a blogger..:)

Loads have happened in the past 6 months for which I'm eternally grateful. Hopefully, gradually, I might get to share. For today, I'm blogging about an idea I got from aloted's.

I'm writing Ten good things about me.

1. I love God and seek His opinion on all the matters of my life, even the minutest details.

2. I'm very dedicated to my family. My hubby takes no 1 priority in my life, then comes my little boy (chairman). My siblings and parents are also always top on my mind. I make sacrifices for them everyday and i'm always willing to do it.

3. I'm a good writer. I get compliments about my writing skills all the time.

4. I am compassionate. I think people find it easy to talk to me about their problems. Hubby jokes all the time about me starting a Dear Aunt Pam column in a magazine.

5. I cook well. Hubby says my food is the best :) Not just him anyway because he'll be a partial judge LOL.

6. I am very neat and organised. I can't function properly in an untidy space. I like everthing spick and span.

7. I am quite amiable. People find me very likeable and i am easy to talk to.

8. I am easygoing and don't fish for trouble. I've never kept malice with anyone, I don't know how to do it.

9. I am entreprenuerial. I always quit my jobs to start something, so I have chosen to be my own boss.

10. I love children. I connect with them easily and people find it easy to leave their kids with me.

Gosh! There are actually so many good things about me, I could go on and on..

I'll stop there for now and leave you with this..I'm totally awesome! *cheeky grin*

Writefreak Plus One

2011-03-09T15:21:00.000+01:00

Writefreak returns o! Well, she didnt really go away. She was just quiet...very! So I return and I'm not alone. My husband and I welcomed our little man on the 5th of February. Yes, God blessed us with a little charmer...our son.
We feel so blessed to have been chosen by God to become his parents. Everytime I look at him, he reminds me of the faithfulness and awesomeness of Jehovah Elshadai.
I'm grateful to know the joy(s) of being pregnant and eventually giving birth. It can only be God!
This is a short post, my attention is needed but I have to say this to someone. God never forgets us, He will never deny us and if there's something you're trusting Him for, hang in there, hold on to Him, stay in Him and in His word. He'll come through for you. He did for us.
God bless you all. Have to go. The king calls! :)

Thankful

2010-11-04T12:02:00.001+01:00

My BBM status all of yesterday was 'Lord I know you are faithful, even when life seems so unfair'. My hubby joked that it was sounding like the kind of things people write to each other in a polygamous home and i told him not to worry, everyone know he only has one wife and he is faithful to her. He was kidding but i was serious about the status. A lot of times, we feel we haven't gotten what we deserve, or maybe people close to us but the bible makes me realise that God is ever faithful and He does no wickedness. Every good and perfect gift is from the father of light.

I know the God I serve, a faithful one and I'm thankful for the so many ways He is showing His faithfulness in my life and that of those close to me. I am thankful for the following reasons.

I can call God my father without a shadow of doubt, I can call Him my friend. I have access to the throne of grace anytime and everytime of the day. I am awed at this fact that God calls me His own and I am just thankful that I have a personal walk with Him.

I have a loving and faithful husband who never gives me a cause to doubt his love for me. We can talk about anything and everything without fear of being judged.I don't take this for granted. We share a beautiful relationship and it's not just because we know how to, it's because we have Christ at the centre of it all. Thank you Lord.

I'm thankful for the ability to be able to call on friends to pray and know that they will. It's awesome when you know there are people all around who cover you in prayer and that when you call on them, they will answer.

I've been in good health. My family and I are well. This is something I think I might have taken for granted but events in the past few days have made me realise that health is nothing to be taken for granted. Dear Lord, I am grateful!

It's awesome when you know you can minister to and inspire someone. I had one of such opportunities again yesterday and I'm thankful that God used me to turn a heart that was going astray back to Himself. He has given me the tongue of the learned that I may know how to speak a word in season to those who are weary!

A friend has been in hospital and although it seems she might have lost something, all is not totally lost. What the enemy meant for evil is turning out to not be a total loss. For this I'm extremely grateful.

Lastly, The Soulsistas are back! Aloted and I took an extended break from our blog but we're back now and for good this time I believe. I'm thankful that both our lives are wholesome enough for us to know we have things to say to our generation!

I could go on and on, God has been faithful to me. What are you thankful for?

Ps: We have a post up on the soulsistas blog, please check it out and don't hesitate to leave your comments.

Much love peeps!

Are we really free or Neo-colonised?

2010-10-13T13:59:00.000+01:00

It's Wednesday, and I'm so thankful for God's grace and mercy. There are so many amazing miracles around me that I can't count.

But it's not really a thankful post. I'm bothered about something and I need to let it out. Aloted wrote a post recently and although I didn't comment on it, I was saying hear hear!

I know a lot of us would rather lose our green passport if we carry any and pick up a blue or red one for life. We hate this country. Does anything even work here? And for some of those who live abroad, when I hear comments they make about Nigeria, it makes me want to cry. There's nothing wrong with living abroad or anywhere but there's something wrong when you see no good in your own roots or your own culture.

Trust me, I know a lot is wrong with this country that should be fixed. We have a million and one challenges. Governance, leadership, etc etc..but it's not all gloom and doom. I watched a show yesterday and all the expatriates that were interviewed had one word in common about being here- opportunities. I kept listening for that word, which sadly a lot of my country men and women don't see.
This is actually not a post about patriotism either. I'd like you to be patriotic though. Your country is your country and even if you do carry another passport, your roots are here. Neo-colonialism is a word I'm sure a number of us are familiar with and I'm seeing a trend that is just making me so sad.

I have been guilty of it too. On Independence day, I asked hubby why the president couldn't have worn a suit and he wisely asked me why he should. Should he wear a suit so he can look colonised? That word got me thinking. But I had my pay back time a few days later (lol). Hubby accused me jokingly of speaking too much Yoruba when we visited a friend. I let him finish and I reminded him of what he told me. I asked him what was wrong with speaking too much Yoruba, not enough colonialism in that, is there? We all laughed.

I speak a lot of Yoruba, I grew up speaking mostly Yoruba to my parents and none of us (my siblings and I) has turned out badly in the English speaking department. Infact, two out of us five have English degrees, and the third person is on his way to bagging one. I speak very good English if I dare say so myself. My mum majored in English for her teaching certificate and she made sure we said English words with the right diction but she taught her children Yoruba. I see it as an advantage, I can hold my own speaking the two languages. Maybe she should have insisted I learnt a third language. I don't write Yoruba too well but I can write it.

On the show yesterday, a black American woman who had lived here for 33 years said she migrated because she wanted her kids to have a culture and a root and she insisted that they spoke only Yoruba in their house while growing up. She said we have a rich culture but we're losing it gradually. I agree and it's extremely sad. I don't do Yoruba traditional worship in case you're wondering lol.

These days I hear of kids who live here in Nigeria but can't eat any real Nigerian food. What in God's name is that? They can't even pronounce their own names correctly! And they think it's 'razz' to speak their native languages. If they can't speak, how can they write??? I'll blame a lot of it on their parents who have given them no sense of pride in their heritage. Some kids won't touch native wear ever, when they can wear jeans.

I saw something on facebook a few days ago and I actually ranted on my profile. Someone wrote 'erekpa lo wah shey'. Is that Yoruba or some foreign language??? I can understand when a non Yoruba peron writes like that but for a Yoruba grown man, it's just totally unacceptable. We should be able to write the basics of our own language. Erekpa is erepa, wah is wa and shey is se. I felt like giving him a lecture...I have seen people write 'jo' as jor. Please it's not an English word, no yoruba word ends with an R.

I bet such blunders might be going on with other Nigerian languages, only I don't know those languages.

I reject every form of colonialism, I am free and I refuse to resell my birthright. I'm proudly African, proudly Nigerian and proudly Yoruba. We should be proud of our rich heritage. I'm afraid the younger generation will meet no culture if we go on this way. God forbid that I let that happen to my children!

Living with the Parents

2010-08-31T15:47:00.000+01:00

I have a bit time on my hands so I've been watching some TV, actually maybe too much TV...:)
This post is inspired by a movie I saw on Africa Magic Yoruba. An elderly couple decide to go and live with their two sons. The younger initially refused but the older prevailed on him. The agreement is that each parent will spend six months each with their sons and swap.
The mother gives the wife a tough time, and gets angry when her son does not greet her before going to work. She wakes up early in the morning and goes to sit in their room saying she wanted to talk to her son. The wife walks out (I'm getting pissed already)
The father dishes out his own medicine. He won't let anyone serve him food aside his son's wife. If she goes out for hours, he refuses food lamenting that his son's wife is punishing him. Wife is watching a movie, he asks, and she says she's been watching out for the second part of the movie so she's happy they're showing it. Father in law decides he wants to play a music video at the same time. So she stops watching her movie.
The brothers eventually decide to send their parents back home since they were beginning to have problems in their marriages. I'm totally in support, infact, they shouldn't have waited that long.
Go forward some time, apparently their parents are cut off from them. Both children are having problems in their lives and the younger consults an Islamic cleric (the way they always go in our movies) and the cleric says he needs to get his parents shoes. The son says it's an impossibility. Eventually the cleric goes with him and they make up with the parents.
We're made to understand that these two young men are having problems because they sent their parents out of their home.
I've got a good question for the writer of this movie: does it mean children can't do right by their parents if they're not living together?
We later find out that the parents were informed by a herbalist to stay with their children for some time and pronounce blessings on them daily to make sure they have no issues in life. They're supposed to keep it a secret from the children.
I have another question. Do people actually consult herbalists in real life? Can't we reach resolutions in our movies without involving the spiritual? I'm a believer and I trust in God for solutions but I don't go round consulting different pastors! Ok, this actually isn't about me..
Are we still such a fetisg society?
The brothers find peace after they make up with their parents and their parents pray for them and forgive them.
No mention was made of what the parents did to their daughters in lawnd how they almost ruined their homes. The writer's focus was on the children sending their parents out.
Does it mean parents have a right to run their children's lives or take over their homes because they suffered for them and fended for them. So it's pay time and they must move in?
I'm totally for taking care of one's parents and supporting them. The bible encourages honouring our parents but I believe parents should allow their children live their own lives. Parents who respect themselves don't impose on their children in my opinion. I know there are circumstances when a parent has to live with their child, sometimes in case of illness or some other unforeseen circumstances. A lot of times though, a parent will side with their child against a spouse which might cause problems in the marriage. Many wives have been known to contend with mothers in law for their husbands' love while a lot of husbands have been made to suffer the wrath of protective mothers in law.
Our society believes children are parents' investments and a parent must depend on children as they get older. I've seen different cases though.
I won't flog it. We all should take care of our parents and not abandon them. Please honour your father and mother so you may live long and it may be well with you.
My question to you is this though; will you bring your parent to live permanently in your home with your spouse?

Pick A Side

2010-08-10T07:42:00.001+01:00

Anyone who knows me well enough knows that I am a stickler for what I believer, most of the time when it comes to making a decision or taking a stand, I say what I believe unapologetically. I try not to be obnoxious though. If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything, I totally agree with that and believe it.

There was a time when if you met a believer, by their words and action, you could say this person is indeed different or indeed a believer. Now, don't get me wrong, it's not about the mode of dressing. It's just something about them, it's the way they conduct themselves. Their conduct is not an arrogant air, it's just a calm assurance that comes from believing and having a relationship with someone greater.

I'll use the word Christian for a believer. Why the name? They were first Christians in the bible because they were Christ like. Their actions were different. They walked and talked differently and people said indeed they must be Christians. Everyone is a Christian now, so long as they belong to a church. Christianity is no religion, it is a way of life! Does Christ rule your actions and thoughts? Do you submit to His lordship?

In the book of James, the apostle said 'a double minded man is unstable in all his ways, let that man not think that he can receive anything from the Lord'. Who is a double minded man? One who can't make up his mind..one who can't decide where he wants to be, what he wants to be and how he wants to be. One who has refused to choose a side!

An interesting discussion ensued between some friends and I a couple of days ago and it has not stopped bothering me. It makes me ask the question are there still Christians (definitely)? Are we still allowing the author of life to reign in our thoughts and actions?

I came up with a story and said a believer I know is asking his wife to have an abortion since she's pregnant the third time and they're both workers in church. If she didn't do it, he was going to leave her. I said what I thought, abortion is murder and the fact that you didn't plan another kid is not enough to go ahead and kill a life you didn't give. I know pro choice ( or whatever people will have my head), no apologies, I believe the bible. Thou shall not kill has not been removed from the word of God.

The interesting bit is that I was said to be judging and that in matters of relationship between a man and a woman, every relationship has its own uniqueness. I don't really like arguing, most times I make my point and back down but you'll know where I stand. The conversation generated several topics but my issue was not resolved. It was painful to me that we were all Christians and subtly, the guy was excused from his 'sin'. A Christian guy would not be leaving his wife and asking her to have an abortion...afterall the bible says God hates putting away.

I know nothing is cast in stone and there are not only black and white lines, sometimes they're grey...with the word of God though, it's usually grey or white. God doesn't sit on the fence. I think that's why He said, 'choose o man, who you will serve'. I could rewrite that and say, 'dear human, you're either for or against me, pick a side'!

Do our unique circumstances sometimes excuse us from living as Christians, definitely not! If you have chosen to be a believer, please uphold the name of our God and live by His word. His commandments are not grievous!

On another note, women who have had real and serious reasons to terminate pregnancies (mostly medical) know how painful it is emotionally and physically and I think it's so superficial to go through it because you didn't plan another child. Can that person plan when to die? If you can, then pls plan when to give life.

I said to my friends, what if you did everything, took all measures (of family planning) and still ended up getting pregnant. It was disturbing for me that it was silently considered ok to make the choice you have to. Someone said 'if the husband allows her, she'll have a fourth'. And I dare say, it's not their fault, it's because they never stayed awake at night asking God for just one child. If they ever went through the pain of infertility, they would not think it's ok to end a life just because 'it was not in the plan'.

Part of the conclusion was that I'm too shielded, my marriage is too wonderful for me to know what's reality and I was priviledged to meet someone who really loves me and vice versa. I know I am but that was beside the point. There were insinuations that the said woman might have planned to get pregnant. In my story, she didn't plan it but I guess each person chose what they wanted to hear.

This is just one of many instances. The 21st century does not change the word of God. He is the same yesterday, today and forever. He won't change His mind about what He has said.

Whose side are you on? Please pick a side and live on the principles of that side.
The grass withers, the flower fades but the word of our God stands sure forever! Isaiah 40 : 8

Ps. Thank you Rita for inspiring me out of my hiatus. I don't promise to be here everytime just yet but I'll be back..
A lot happened while I was away, I added a year, a milestone, I turned 30, might talk about that later. I love you all bloggers and I kinda miss you :)

Thankful

2010-05-19T16:16:00.000+01:00

Bless the Lord o my soul and everything within me, bless His holy name...

I'm thankful for so many things that might sound very basic but I never ever want to take God's blessings in my life for granted.

For being a daughter to God and having a relationship where I can call Him my loving father.

For being married to the most wonderful man. My husband is very busy and under a lot of pressure but he never neglects me or our relationship.

For laughter in my home constantly. There's always a reason to smile even on the very blue days!

For my mum and dad and my siblings..God continually keeps them in good and perfect health.

For my sisters in law and their kids and husbands and for my brother in law. God continually keeps them all in health and we have peace.

For healthy, safety, and provision for hubby and I. It's wonderful to know God consistently watches over us.

For the way God always tries to get my attention and get His word to me. This week I have once again been reminded of how He alone should be first place in my life and not allow anyone or anything take His place. Thank you father for reminding me of what is most important.

For the wonderful friends that surround me. Sometimes I don't find comfort/understanding where I expect but God has given me some friends who continue to stand by me.

I'm thankful for all these and more, what are you thankful for???

Random Rants!

2010-05-10T08:49:00.003+01:00

I've been jogging almost everyday for the past one month, well over a month, remember the 3Ps, i sorta continued after the first 30 days and just intensified the pace. I cut short my length and now jog all the way for about 25 minutes and then get back. I must say it's not been the easiest thing to do, getting out of bed at 6:15 am but it's been good. I love the adrenaline rush i get from running, i love that i can talk to God as i get out that early and it has sort of helped give my day more order. I now have to make sure i shower early and start my day on time. It's had a good number of benefits. I haven't lost that much weight but i think i'll get there if i don't give up. I'm going to be adding some more ingredients to the mix that will help me lose weight...so help me God.

Even hubby has commended me on how disciplined and focused I've been. He thinks I'm really trying hard, so imagine how upset I am when I met some spoilt brat yesterday. I haven't seen this person in about 6 years and infact I didnt recognise her. She called my name while hubby was introducing me to someone important and I thought the fact that I didn't have my glasses on had something to do with me not recognising this person. I walked up to her and she introduced herself. So I was like oh yeah, sorry it's been long, I just didnt recognise you. She said something i thought wasn't funny then went on to ask me why i had added so much weight. I smiled politely, then she went on to let me know how after having two kids, she's slimmer than me (not having any kids yet). She was like 'this is not good, not good', go and lose some weight, infact you should start jogging.

I just stood there tongue tied, typical reaction when i'm upset. I wish i could be more outspoken in instances like that. I didnt bother asking for her number or anything, I don't want to remain in contact with such people. I walked back to hubby and told him what had transpired. He was very angry and said i shouldn't have let her get off with it. I wish i didn't and a part of me just wants to email to call her to order.

In the first place, Mrs 'i'm slimmer than you', who is in a competition with you? Is it my fault you have such a low self esteem that you must make yourself feel good by comparing yourself to others? You should watch it because someday you will meet your match or someone more brutal than yourself, and you could just end up with a slap. Infact, I might be glad to be the one doing the slapping! You don't know anything about me, you don't know me, other than seeing me once 6 years ago, so how dare you run your mouth like that! Just warning you, you prolly won't be reading but i'm telling you...NEVER ever stick your nose in my business again! I love myself the way i am, you don't know the effort i'm making...and just don't stick your nose in my business.

I don't know why people think it's a prerequisite to make comments on someone else's weight if they haven't seen the person in a while. Stop it! It doesn't make for good conversation. Learn some tact if you haven't got it. Unless someone asks your opinion about their weight, no matter what it is, please shove it! Or well, unless you're very close to them and it's not too personal to talk about! The next time i get unsolicited advice or comment about my weight, i would be really nasty, i think! ( i wish i could do that!. You'd think i am that big sef...nonsense.

My hair is pretty damaged, i just found out. I'm trying to decide what to do about that. I just noticed one whole side is pretty much shorter than the rest. I think i might have to let it grow naturally for some time and trim it all to the same length. It's so painful though. I remember some years back, something like that happened to me but it was even worse, oen side went bald. I really need to find me a good salon/hairdresser in this city of Abuja.

Ok, rant over, i got me some work to do!

Have a nice week everyone! :-)

A Tale of My Blenders

2010-04-08T22:32:00.001+01:00

Any woman who has a good relationship with her kitchen knows blenders are a very essential tool in the kitchen. Blenders, you gotta love them! I have a good relationship with my pink kitchen, yes my kitchen is pink! Some days, it’s a love hate relationship as I sweat over different meals bt when I see the outcome, I fall in love all over with my kitchen.
Ok so the kitchen can’t steal the shine from its component today. The story is about my blenders. They serve me so well, I’m sure sometimes, they want to flee the kitchen as I work them to death! I don’t do the usual grinding with machines that people do. I blend everything, even the beans for moinmoin!
Five years ago, I bought a blender, it was a Kenwood one. At the time, I thought it was a bit costly as I priced others of different makes but the black and silver was so sexy to me, it got me and I had to buy it! See, I don’t like white gadgets in the kitchen, everything in my kitchen that I had an input in how they got there are silver and black/grey. I will never use my money to buy anything white, to me they’re just too clinical! I kind of kept the blender till I almost got married, so let’s say that blender has served me four years!
As wedding gifts, you get a lot of gift items, mundane and useful ones. Several weeks after our wedding, a cousin deposited a gift from an uncle to my house, it was a Binatone blender. I unwrapped it and one look at it, I thought, no way, this doesn’t belong in my kitchen. Yep, you guessed right, it was a white blender with green controls. I decided to keep it anyway as a smoothie/fruit blender. It served its purpose once in a while. I didn’t use it much. My Kenwood on the other hand was always at work!
After serving me almost three years, one of the components gave out, I replaced it with the one in the smaller cup and it continued working. Some months back, I was blending pepper, or was it beans, I don’t remember. The controls between the upper and lower part wasn’t connecting. The blender wasn’t rolling. Alas, my invincible Kenwood blender had given up. I mourned its loss but refused to part with it. I packed it up and kept it in the kitchen cabinet. I brought out the Binatone that hasn’t seen much work.
The think about the Kenwood is that the parts are collapsible, you can couple it yourself. It’s not the same with the Binatone, the only detachable part is the cup. After using for a few months though, the blender gave out on me while Jhazmyn was here. I was making moinmoin for her and her husband (points accusing finger). I used the small cup and finished it up. The plastic on the control part got burnt and that was it, the end of my Binatone blender that I had no real sentiments towards, except necessity. Two blenders laid to rest in my Pink kitchen L
Two nights ago, No Limit was here (yeah, I know, bloggers visit me and I love to entertain them J), and I was cooking, I needed to blend some pepper and it just occurred to me that I could try my Kenwood blender again. Well I brought it out, changed some of the parts of the big cup to the old one, coupled it and tried my luck. Yes, you guessed right, it worked! It so worked! I came to the living room and exclaimed to hubby and the friend that was here; ‘Kenwood rules baby’! I explained to the friend who is getting married in a few weeks how Kenwood kitchen gadgets would be better for their kitchen. He listened attentively, probably just humouring me and wondering what on earth this woman was going on about. Well, hubby told me, his wife is the convert I need to explain my theory to.
So my Kenwood blender is back, in top form, I still used it this night. And one word of advice for you ladies, Kenwood rules! Never buy inferior gadgets for your kitchen!
Have a nice weekend y’all!

Ps; the 3Ps are going well..I think I've only missed two days since starting, Sunday and the day I had shin splints...

Day 2 of the 3Ps

2010-04-01T17:53:00.000+01:00

I got out the door at 7:46 a.m, I got back at 8:39a.m. My maths is not so good..o can't calculate how long that was. I only calculate money well :-)

I must be looking hot, two young guys said hello and winked at me as I was rounding the bend from my street. They waved and I waved back. I didn't hear them with my ipod plugged in and very loud. I waved back. It was a good start to my walk! Lol
I must make a playlist of my favourite worship songs, I had to look for them manually this morning as I went. I ws in my own world, at peace with the world and in tune with God. I played a song 'Usher me' by Aretha Murril-Crooms among others. I don't know why some drivers hooted as I went, I was on the side-walk, a few even waved at me. I don't know why! Maybe they were just fascinated! The same car passed by me twice, I wonder where he was going, it was on the same side both times.

I felt like I could go on for a while longer , maybe because I was praying but I decided not to overdo it.

Mystoriesmytestimonies, I prayed for you and I do believe you'll pass that board exam this time. Will keep thanking God for you.

Jaycee is my only committed partner, thanks girl for agreeing to do this with me. If you're interested, you can still join us...not too late!

For those of you who just want to do the 2Ps, you're welcome. I'm sure we will have testimonies in these 30 days!

YNB, thanks for thinking of me, you can see I did this!

Love and peace y'all.

Hope the formating isn't too bad! On my mobile.

For Thirty or Sixty Days...3Ps

2010-03-31T10:09:00.001+01:00

This time last year, I had recently moved into a new neighbourhood. I was fascinated that i could walk, jog or run on the sidewalks, i did it consistently for some months, then i stopped, mainly due to circumstances almost beyond my control.

A year down the line, 2 or 3 extra kgs, I thought to myself that it's time for a change, time to do something drastic, or well something different. My husband asked me on Sunday if i really want to lose weight as i claim because he doesn't see me doing much about it, i just keep saying. He told me he's not complaining (he really isn't) but i'm always talking about it. Talk is cheap! So i shrugged and kept thinking about it. Hubby has that effect on me! :-)

Most people tell me i'm ok at this size and bla bla, i kinda agree, at the same time, i have an ideal weight in my mind's eye and it's not 68.5kg, it's a maximum of 65kg. Like hubby told me, my problem isn't food, it's not even junk food, i don't eat much and i hardly snack, people who know me very well can testify to it. Most days my eating habit borders on starvation, i don't know why, don't ask me.

And even if I'm not looking to lose weight, I know I need to exercise regularly to keep fit, be healthy and all that. I've preached that message so many times, my once in a while gym going won't do it. At a point, I said to myself that having an Ipod will help me walk or exercise better (excuses...).Hubby gave me an Ipod on Valentine's day, i use it a lot, not just to walk or run. The last time i did some major power walking, it was both of us, and that was two weeks ago.

So we went to bed at a good time yesterday (i usually don't, i'm a night owl) and when hubby started getting ready for work this morning, i woke up(as the custom is). I said to myself, it's a good time, it's before 7:00a.m, why don't i go walking. I said it to him, he didn't respond, sharp man!

So as hubby got out of the door, I didn't waste time, I got into my sports gear, picked up my Ipod and voila, i was on the sidewalk. I didnt jog or run, i only walked but it felt good. I asked myself, 'why not do his everyday?' Then I thought I could actually do it consistently for thirty or sixty days.

All I need is some motivation and some form of accountability. So my blogville family, I am choosing to be accountable to you first for the next thirty days.

My commitment is to power walk everyday of the week except Sunday mornings (we go to church very early) and when something unforeseen comes up,for the next thirty days and then I will decide to continue or not.

I might need to make some changes especially to my bedtime because that has been one of my issues. When I go to bed at 3am, what time do I wake up to go walk or run? So it looks like bedtime might need to be adjusted.

I will blog about my experience everyday, the things I see, who i meet and so on. That is going to be some big commitment, considering how haphazard my blogging has been! Help me Jehovah!

And considering I am a spirit that has a soul who lives in a body, I have decided this 'exercise' is not just going to be about power walking. It will have two other p's. So the three Ps;

Prayer
Praise
Power walking.

I will praise God, listen to worship on my Ipod and pray (about anything and everything)as i power walk. To include you my friends, I think if you have anything you really need someone to pray with you about, you can email me (through my profile), leave a comment, and I will pray about it as I walk the next day.

I won't mind if anybody wants to join me in doing the 3Ps, first for the next 30 days starting today (well tomorrow). It will make it fun and we can all be accountable to each other. You can let me know in the comment box if you want to be involved. Let's build our bodies and our spirits in the process!

Ps: It's Nolimit's birthday! She's such a great lady! One thing I know about her is that she's really dependable. She was in my house Friday night/Saturday morning and it was great. Father I thank you for this your daughter, how far you have brought her and I pray you continue to give her wisdom to live her life for you. Amen!

Jhazmyn has also been in my corner of the world. She's in Abuja with her hubby and we hung out together all day yesterday. It was great hanging out with you girl. She went with me everywhere; bank, grocery shopping, etc etc. Then we came home to cook while her hubby kept calling to find out when she was coming back (it was getting late). It was fun...

So who wants to join me in doing the 3Ps? If you don't want to join, if you have a prayer need still, let me know. I believe we will have testimonies!

Enjoy the rest of your week everyone!

Another Wednesday...

2010-03-24T12:09:00.002+01:00

Another lovely Wednesday, another opportunity to worship, another opportunity to be alive, another opportunity to fulfill purpose...each day brings such wonderful opportunities.

God is ever good and worthy to be praised so i'm thanking Him again this week for the following things.

I'm thankful for life and the opportunity being alive presents. God constantly gives my loved ones and I the opportunity to be alive. It's easy to take being alive for granted but when I think about where some people are, I just lift my hands and say thank you father. I can aspire because I am alive, a living dog is better than a dead lion!

I'm thankful for my marriage. Lord I thank you because even when I want to take my eyes off my blessing and take the man you have given me for granted. I only need to look around at the relationships existing around me and I have to say thank you Lord for my husband is a good man indeed!

I'm thankful for the ability to dream. Sometimes i want to stop dreaming, i want to quit but you never let me. You constantly give me things to aspire to, to pursue. And for a man that won't let me rest on my oars, thank you Lord.

I'm thankful for the weather. I know we have all complained about the dust, yes it is very dusty Lord but it's not so hot anymore so I thank you Lord.

I'm thankful for wonderful friends who surround me. Thank you for that call that came through to me even when i thought nobody cared.

I'm thankful for provision. People say times are hard but I haven't had cause to say that. When men are saying there is a casting down, you help me Lord to see a lifting up.

I'm thankful for journey mercies for hubby. He travels a lot but you keep him safe and keep bringing him back to me. Thank you Lord.

So many things I could list, may I never take your blessings for granted father and may the reader of this be able to pick out at least one thing to say thank you father for.

What are you thankful for today?

Writefreak on Bookaholic Blog

2010-03-23T13:25:00.006+01:00

Writefreak is on Bookaholic

Hey my people, hope you had great weekends and that your plans for the week are working out.

It's been only two days this week, and i feel like I've done so much already!

Quick one, there's an interview of mine on bookaholic blog and you might want to read. It's basically for my contribution to the In my dreams series...Hope you guys have been following!

You can find it here.

Please read and drop a comment.

Against All Odds, I Glorify!

2010-03-10T13:28:00.005+01:00

Today I don't feel like praising. I don't even want to worship but I will because I do not only praise You father for what I can get or for what You can do. I praise you Lord because you are God, because you are faithful and you are just. And although questions rage in my heart, I will not yield to the temptation, i will NEVER question you. You number the hair on my head, Lord You care in an amazing manner and for this I surrender to You in worship.

I am tempted to go into a dark place and maybe stay there. I am tempted to cover my head with my blanket and stay there but although it is so tempting, I will not yield. I choose to praise You for that which You said You can do because that is exactly what You will do. Almighty God, indeed, Your might is more than any I have ever seen.

When I want to doubt, You constantly show me in Your word that You are capable of doing all things and showing Your might strong on behalf of those whose hearts are blameless towards You. Sarah was 80 years old Lord when you decided to make her a sign and a wonder. Who else can do that but you Lord? You are awesome! Inspite of her unbelief, she even laughed when you spoke but my Lord, you blessed her!

Abraham was 90 years old, you fulfilled your promise to Him. Father I might not understand but like Isaac, with a knife to my neck, I will trust that You have provided my ram. The one that will take my place for the sacrifice. I thank You o Lord because you're never late! You're always on time although in my head, I wonder what is taking You so long! (you must shake your head when you look at me Lord).

When Job was in the most uncomfortable situation, He chose to praise You. He said though He slay me, I will praise Him. I have not been uncomfortable like Job father, I choose to praise You and even if i were, Your praise would NEVER leave my lips. He was advised to curse you and die but he held on and praised you. Like Job this afternoon, I praise You.

Habbakuk knew how to worship and even when everything seemed so bleak, the fig trees would not blossom, the vine would not yield their increase, He chose to praise. I choose to praise Lord. You are faithful.

I remember the Israelites in Egypt father, how you brought them out with a strong hand and fed them with manna. You even gave them water out of a rock. Dear father, You are AWESOME!

I remember Hannah, how you turned her story around. Thank you Lord! You turned around the story of Jabez. Thank you father. You were in that fiery furnace with Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego. My God, you are a DELIVERER! Paul was bitten by a snake and nothing happened to him. Look how you gave them wine at the wedding Lord and saved them from disgrace. Oh Lord, You alone cover my shame and i praise you!

When I remember all these amazing testimonies, I cannot but praise. You are the God who is NEVER late.

For my life and my husband's, I thank you. You constantly care for us. You are our pillar, our rock and you sustain us. You keep us together in your love and harmony and give us joy that only you can give. Thank you dear Lord.

I thank you Lord for all my family and friends. You constantly keep them.

For those friends I was praying for, the ones who have experienced heartaches and losses that You have now blessed Lord, I give you thanks. This time Lord I am thankful because in theirarms, they will welcome bundles of joy.

I thank you for all You are and all You do. I thank you for the air I breathe though I constantly complain of how hot it is.

Lord I thank You because You constantly choose to use this earthen vessel for your glory. You give me the opportunity to encourage and bless others even though I might be grumpy sometimes. You let them see a beacon of light through me and I am grateful that although I might have an albatross on my neck, You use it for Your glory. And through me, the scripture that says you have given me the tongue of the learned that I may know how to speak a word in season to the weary is fulfilled.

Be magnified o Lord, You're indeed worthy!

Borrowing from Rita's post, I can say

You keep track of all my sorrows
You have collected all my tears in Your bottle. You have recorded each one in Your book (Ps 56:8 NLT)

Get In The Deep End!

2010-03-03T22:11:00.001+01:00

I learnt to swim some years back and the instructor did a great job of teaching me, actually us. My husband and i (then fiance) with my sister all learnt together. He was a task master and he would make us go to the deep end with no warning. The pool was fairly large and the first time he made me do it, it felt like a feat i could not achieve. He went with me, and i did it! It was amazing.

Coach I was like a slave driver and if you managed to drink water, he would call you 'Shakira' (something about shacking water..lol. Left to me, I would know all the styles he could teach, back strokes, breast strokes, free style etc. I stayed with breast strokes, that was the one he first taught me. I tried back strokes too and i was ok with it but i just liked breast strokes better.

A few years later, i had not gone swimming in a while, there were so many reasons not to. There was no good pool around, I would have to travel a far distance from my house in Surulere when i lived in Lagos etc. Swimming took a back seat and I only got to fool around in the water whenever I got the opportunity to.

A few years later (NOW), I live in a city where traffic is not a problem, I have the membership of a hotel gym and I can use the pool anytime i want. I'm a registered member, I don't need to pay a dime extra. I go a bit more frequently now.

EVerytime i'm at the pool, i stay in the shallow end and just keep swimming the breath back and forth. I would tell myself sometimes it's the same skill i use for the breadth that i need for the length but would still not venture out.

The last time at the pool, hubby suggested starting from the deep end so if i got stuck, i could stop just before the shallow end. I didn't think i wasn't going because i though i couldn't make it to the end. I can swim well, it's just a four letter word FEAR. I've had episodes in the past when by myself I would stop in the middle of the water and shout 'I'm drowning'. I wasn't really drowning, I just decided in my mind I couldn't move on.

So today, I decided why not take the Mr's advice and start from the deep end. I stayed there for a while hanging on the wall for support, i tried to acclimatise, i even went down and let my feet touch the ground so i could spring up. I lost control a bit at that point and then i did what my instructor taught me, i sprang up and voila, my head came up. I waited a few minutes and then

I decided to glide forward. I pushed myself forward and instructed myself to swim. One stroke after the other, with my legs kicking, i made it to the shallow end with no incident. I made sure i stayed close to the wall though(chicken me).

Then when i swam back to the deep end, i asked hubby why i never ventured out by myself, he said FEAR. He explained how i had put a limitation on myself, told myself i could not do it and no matter what anyone said, until i told myself i could, nobody could. I went back and forth and made sure i did seven laps. I did it! I could with no help
from anyone.

Thinking about it, God taught me a lesson. He has told me I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. His word is true but when i say the word can't, my brain shuts down, i see no way around it and no matter what, I just can't.

It's like that with every area of our lives. I dared myself, I pushed myself forward, although my hubby thought i could, his words could not have done it for me if i didn't dare to try.

In what area have you said to yourself I can't, although you know deep down that if only you try, you can? Like my husband said to me, I dare you to take off the limitation on your mind and swim to the deep end.

You can!

And They Came To Town!

2010-02-10T15:30:00.003+01:00

I was so excited. I hadn't seen my closest friend since she got married. We talked everyday but seeing each other had become long thing. So when her trip for Naija was set, I quickly booked her ticket to come to see me. We bargained back and forth on how long she would spend and eventually we agreed on a week. She arm twisted me actually, I didn't agree.

D-day! Hubby and I were at the airport and then I saw this chic with a baby carrier. I was so excited. It didn't feel like two years though, I still spoke to her the day before. First thing was to carry my goddaughter that I was seeing for the first time. I looked at her and I knew I was in love. I loved her since she was in the womb! The day she was born, I knew already she was here! I knew when her mother went to the hospital. I dreamt of them all night and prayed in the dream and she was born in my dream. When I woke up, I knew she was born that night. And yes, the text message confirmed it. I wept tears of joy that day. I loved my goddaughter already! And looking at her, I knew I was sold for life!

Ok back to my god-daughter's mother, who happens to be my friend (hehehehe), so we hugged each other and I told her she looked good (did I?). We got in the car and we just picked up our conversation like we saw each other fifteen minutes before then. It was so good to see her again. I didn't know if the room I had them in when we got home was comfortable enough or not, considering my little love, but they got settled quickly and my friend assured me they were cool.

I couldn't get enough of the little lady. She is sooooo adorable. OMG, i could play with her forever! Lol. She had a cold that night and I felt sorry for her. Hubby went out to get her nasal drops with a doctor friend while her mum and I fretted. The night flew by and the little miss had to go to bed. She goes to bed at 9 and stays in bed. Jeez! She is such a good child! My friend looks nothing like she has a little baby...hehehehe (i hope she doesn't kill me).

The week flew by, we went to the market. We bought gold for the little miss. I had dreamt of buying her earrings from day 1. We fulfilled the dream. We got scolded in the market for bringing such a little baby in the sun. Case in point, an elderly Yoruba woman who instructed us to take her home immediately. We still had a bit of shopping to do so we entered a shop and right there was the woman again. My first impulse was to 'flee' the shop, my friend and I were in sync, we both saw her, looked at each other and we were gone. When we got outside the shop, with the little miss in my arms, we both burst into laughter. We were giggling like idiots. Such great moments.

We went to eat fish and on their last night with us, hubby ordered the fish in. It's amazing how your life changes with a child in it. Great changes! But I learnt in the one week that one would definitely have to make adjustments. You can't just up and go like hubby and I are fond of doing. Many times, we had to finetune plans of going out because of her. It was so much fun!

Oh and hubby was sooo good with her. He calls her his darling (?). They had their moments where they would whisper to each other, she would give him sloppy kisses and they just said things my friend and I both didn't bother to find out. He's great with kids and I think the little miss made his week. There were so many pictures of their moments!

And my friend actually allowed me to bath her without supervision one afternoon! Wow. That really tripped me. She just told me what to do and said i'm sure you won't let her fall. You can bath for her and we went and did our thing. Oh little miss, we sure had fun in the bathroom, didn't we. She rewarded me with lots of spit on my face. She started spitting when the got here. I think she's teething. She would just do phhhbbbbttttt and there you have your face full. I love the sloppy kisses she likes to dish out. So many sloppy kiss moments. Little miss, i love the sloppy kisses you dish out and I miss them.

I changed diapers, I sang lullabies, I was pinched and I was kissed. I love them all. My friend is not clingy to her baby and I love that. Yes she has all those motherly tendencies and would say things like 'don't do that to my baby o(hehehehehehe)' but I love the way she's slightly detached and would even gist while my god daughter is crying. Mscheew, one day I yelled at her to go and attend to the baby and she said 'finish your gist'. Agbaya. She's a good mummy and sometimes I would just look at her and think, 'seriously, my friend is a mummy'.

It was a reunion of two ladies who once had hopes of becoming adults and are now becoming. Before it was just us, now it's us and our husbands and a little one. Soon, it will be us, our husbands and a good number of little ones. I see us having family reunions, get togethers, parties, barbecues etc.

One thing I know for sure, I'm sold, I'm in love. I love my goddaughter and I love her mother even more. Aloted, thank you for coming to town. We miss you and the little miss so much. See you soon at yours!

Your Word Makes Me Thankful!

2010-01-20T12:33:00.005+01:00

The Lord does great things! He is full of wonders and it is amazing how He daily loads us with benefits. There was a time I would look hard before finding things to thank God for but when I started my thankful series last year, it opened my eyes, and I have become soo thankful. When we dwell in God's word and we let it minister to us, it's amazing how things become so colourful and bright. And like Jesus did, even in the midst of the storm, we can even sleep and even snore! We must let Christ's word dwell richly in us...that way, we can live thankful lives, genuinely thanking Him for His goodness and blessings.

Per time, there are things we desire and we keep on asking, and that i believe is unbelied because Mark 11:24 says 'Whatever you desire, WHEN you pray, believe that you receive and you will have it'. Asking over and over again is unbelief, we must believe and once we have prayed and believed, we must continue in thanksgiving, not doubting until we see the manifestation of what we have asked Him (i will probably write more about this sometime). He is faithful to do that which He promised and when we know this, we start to have a thankful heart.

I am thankful for God's word. It is amazing how as I spend time in the word, it changes my world view, impossible things are made possible, faith rises up more and more in my heart and Ieven have what to combat the devil with when doubts arise in my heart. The word of God is a title deed, when you have the title deed to a land, no matter how long it takes you to build on that land, you know it belongs to you. Over certain matters in my life, I have been able to move from the realm of doubt to being FULLY PERSUADED that He who promised is faithful. His word gives light!

I am thankful for how hubby and I have moved from becoming almost complacent Christians to ones that have living relationships with God. The last few months have seen us becoming stronger Christians, building our faith more and walking with God daily. I can say we're indeed believers! And I am so grateful for a man who leads me into the presence of God. Too many times, women are the most spiritual in their families and keep hoping their husbands can catch on.

My sister was looking for a job for some months and it was beginning to affect her self esteem and also causing some strain between us because she was having to depend on people. Hubby and I felt a leading to tell her to start a business of buying and selling, she was convinced she was not cut out for it, and found every possible excuse that made her unfit for the business including finances. We decided to give her a loan and I must say months after she's running a business and doing well. Her mentality has changed and she even talks of growing the business. I'm very thankful for this.

When my brother was going to start NYSC last year, it looked like he was going to such a far place, he was posted to a village withough PHCN power, they depend on generating sets only for those who could afford it. He has travelled so many times and God has kept him. In only a few weeks, he will be done and I'm thankful for this. I am also thankful in advance for direction from God for him.

This time last year, I knew I wanted to be published, every writer wants to get published but I didn't know that the year would end with a book that has my name on it. I'm thankful that FG got the initiave for the In My Dreams series and also that she got the inspiration to make it into a book. Now i can boldly say there's a book out with my name on it. I am thankful because my personal works will definitely get published. God has proved to me that all things are possible.

Complacency is a great disease and it has been the case with most Nigerians. All we do is talk in our houses but no action. I'm thankful that a new breed of Nigerians are starting to wake up who will not only fight for Nigeria in their actions but will also get down on their knees and fight for their countries. I'm grateful to God for being part of a church family that will not keep quiet against corrpution and every form of evil being perpetrated in this country. Dear God, I thank you because Nigeria will indeed be free in this year of Jubilee!

What are you thankful for?

Change is Coming + Giveaway

2010-01-11T14:34:00.007+01:00

Tomorrow, Abuja and other cities in different parts of the world will witness a peaceful rally tagged 'Save Nigeria' against all the things we just sit down in our houses and complain about.

We're all experts when it comes to analysing Nigeria's issues and condemning our leaders' actions, but how many of us really get up to do something about it or will seriously do something to change the status quo even if given the opportunity? I know, i will and that is why I am joining several other Nigerians at the Unity fountain tomorrow in Abuja. The walk is going to be led by Professor Wole Soyinka and a numbe rof other prominent Nigerians.

It's high time we started to speak up and say NO to things we don't want. A lot of my friends and acquaintances live abroad and can't consider moving back home for a lot of reasons. Those of us at home are glad we can afford the comforts of life and just shake our heads at what our leaders are doing. Most of the great countries we admire took hundreds of years to build with some people even sacrificing their lives. We have to fight for our country. If we don't stand for something, we will fall for anything!

Seriously, what country has a case like Mutallab's and you don't get a press statement from the government??? What Nigeria should have done the same day and the days following was to go on air and decline any knowledge of such actions and that the country dissociates itself from any such act and given reasons to support our point of view. The US gave us a whole week to do something, and what does our government give, SILENCE. We should have gone on major TV channels all over the world dissociating ourselves from the act but our government did ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

Since our government won't, WE WILL save Nigeria. Be a part of the change, join the rally tomorrow if you can. In Abuja, the point of convergence is the Unity fountain at 10 a.m. You can go here for more information.

God bless Nigeria!

Interesting Stuff

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This competition closes on 8 February 2010 – get on the freebie train now!!!

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Fun Times Are Here!

2010-01-07T22:34:00.002+01:00

I'm not going to start the new year by apologising for being away from my blog. I love this blog, i love this place but sometimes a hiatus is necessary. I had things to attend to and i am not sorry I didn't blog in that space of time. I just missed some of my favourite blogs and bloggers.

I'll say my happy new year! This is going to be a great year. Fun and exciting times are ahead and this is the year for fulfillment of dreams. There are so many things that will happen this year and i'm glad to be starting it on an exciting note...will tell you all about it in a bit.

Have you written your goals for this year? I don't believe in making resolutions, they don't work most times. We end up ditching them somewhere along the line and we wonder what happened to our resolutions someday. Willpower doesn't cause change or fulfill dreams. The grace of God with careful planning does. Think about where you want to be and what you want to achieve and write them down, be specific and then present them to God. They don't have to be too many, a few things that you know will make a difference in your life.

My Christmas break was fun and busy! Hubby and I spent time with our family members on both sides. There was a lot of reunion, a lot of laughter, a lot of prayers and so much food! I think i ate too much...although my stomach usually doesn't have as much capacity as i want it to. Lol. It was rewarding to see everyone and know that we have so much to be thankful for. We're definitely blessed.

I was to meet up with Jhazmyn and Rita in Lagos, we actually planned an outing with our spouses (or is it spice since the plural of mouse is mice) but we got help up at my parents' so outing had to be cancelled. It was very painful for me. I did meet Jhazmyn though (Rita and i have met a number of times. We've actually spent a couple of days together before...don't ask me). We met in church on the 31st, and it was just like i'd known her for a long time. We've been talking for a long time anyway so it was just natural to be able to talk to each other. Our husbands even know each other from Uni; small world! They ended up dropping hubby and i off at a taxi park. It was so great meeting, we were supposed to meet the following day but she stood me up, i've forgiven her though.I was also supposed to meet my sweet blog daughter, buttercup but it didn't happen...ish..some other time

I'm sure a number of you were following our series . Well, the good news is the blog has now been made into an ebook and you all can buy and read and reread. You can buy it here. Favoured Girl worked really hard to get the book together and i must say thumbs up for her.
We're going to start the Season 2 in February so you all can watch out for that. For now, please support us by downloading the ebook or buying the paperback online. It's a great note on which to be starting this year, when last year started, I didn't think a book would be out that would have my name on it. It's a dream come true and there's a lot more to come.

This year definitely holds a lot and fun and exciting times. This year, God is pouring out His grace. Seemingly impossible things will be made possible by faith. It is a year of Jubilee (our country is 50 this year) and as ctizens, we're entitled to great things in our personal lives. For everyone, I pray that this year will be the year you'll back and say indeed it was better than last year! Whatever we do, let's remember to walk with God and put Him first.

Have a blessed year everyone!

Three Years!

2009-12-09T13:19:00.002+01:00

Today i'm thankful for just one thing..and it's big...Mr and Mrs Writefreak are three years!

I'm thankful for the love, peace and joy in our home...i don't take it for granted. We don't exchange angry words, we never argue or fight, we're able to resolve our issues without any third party involvement, and the things i call issues are not even issues!

Today i thank you father for finding my soulmate and giving him to me...for laughter and friendship, for affection and care, for a husband that puts my needs above his and even says he can die for me if need be :-). I'm thankful for increase...we're not where we were last year, physically and spiritually...I thank you for my husband L ord, he's the best you could ever have given me..and for the things we desire as a family, i thank you because you have done them!

For those with turbulence in their hopes, father i pray for your calmness, for those who are planning to get married, father i pray you direct their steps and give them wisdom...

Thank you Lord!

Like the Leper....

2009-11-25T14:06:00.007+01:00

My thankful Wednesdays have been far between, there's so much to say, so much to thank God for, so little time to come on here and share them. It's the last Wednesday of the month of November and when i think about the goodness of the Lord, it makes me want to shout...actually it makes me shout!

I'm going to be like that one leper, ten were healed, only one came back to give thanks...he had a reward for coming back to give thanks but i'm not even interested in the reward right now, i'm more interested in giving Jehovah the praise. He deserves all my praise...ah! Job said though he slays me, yet i will praise Him. Understanding tells me He does not slay me, i am not even slayed, He has put me above and over, why should i not shout and praise Him?

David worshipped God with all His might, he didn't consider that he was a king, he got all emotional in the presence of his maker, did a dance, clapped, worshipped because he knew the goodness of the Lord. From a sherperd boy, he got to the throne, he chose not to forget and i choose not to forget! I remember your goodness to me Jehovah, only you are God and i worship you!

Michal was used to being in the palace, she was afterall the son of Saul, she didn't see why a whole king of Israel should embarass himself so, oh well, she did get a reward for disdaining a man who was worshipping God with all his might. The bible call David a man after God's heart. David worshipped God so much, he wrote so many psalms to him.

I will worship God, His praise will continually be on my lips because i have and continue to see his goodness in the land of the living. I don't forget, i look at my blessings and i am counting them one by one. I am thankful for every single thing in my life and that i own. It is by His mercy that i am not consumed. It is by His grace that i wake up in the morning and i am able to call him father. Ah father, my heart wells up with love for you! My soul magnifies your name because you are the God who shut the mouth of the lions for Daniel, you kept Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego in the fiery furnace and they were not burnt. How could the Israelites have crossed the red sea without you?

I have seen you hand, i have seen you move and i cannot deny your existence, i cannot deny the fact that when i call on you in absolute trust , you answer me. Jehovah, i lift my hands and shout YOU ARE GOD! And declare that only a fool will say in his heart that there is no God. My maker, i am in awe of you and i cannot stand still for your goodness.

If i had a thousand, even a million tongues, i could not praise you enough. *Oluwa bi gbogbo irun ori mi je kiki ahon, won o to lati yin yi. *Kabiyesi, oba awon oba, Oluwa awon Oluwa*, the root of the tribe of Jesse. Oba to n je emi ni!* I am that I am, I shout that you alone are worthy! No one, NO ONE can compare to you. I declare there is no other God.I call you JEHOVAH!!!

Jehovah Elshaddai: Lord you are more than enough! You are bigger than who people say. With you, i am not in need of anything. I call you my own Jehovah Elshaddai!

Jehovah Tsidkenu: Oh Lord you are my righteousness...because of Jesus Christ, i have a right standing with you. I can come into your presence and declare that i am righteous. Jehovah, you are my righteousness!

Jehovah Mekadesh/Mekadishkem, you are the God who sanctifies, you are my own sanctifier!

Jehovah Shalom, God you are my peace. Because of you anxiety is far from me, fear is far, depression is far. Oh Lord my peace, i worship you!

Jehovah Shammah; You are ever present oh God. You are everywhere with me. When i am lying there feeling helpless, you are there Jehovah! When i did that thing i was not proud of, Jehovah you were even there. Ah Lord God! I am in awe of you. You said you will never leave me nor forsake me and truly you are ALWAYS there.

Jehovah Nissi: Lord you are my banner! Your banner over me is love father and you shield me from every evil. You cover me with your love...oh Lord i am in awe of your love for me.

Jehovah Rapha: Lord you are my healer. When i let that sickness stay on my body, not acknowledging that you healed me already, you are my healer, when i choose to acknowledge it, Lord you're still my healer. Because of you, my family is not in and out of hospital. Lord you are worthy!

Jehovah Jireh: Oh Lord you are my provider. If it means creating what i want from the scratch, you will do it father...you know exactly what i need and you supply it. I am not in lack, i am not in want...and when i need something, all i have to acknowledge is that you are my provider!

Jehovah Rohi: Lord you are my sherperd. It is because of you i am not walking about aimlessly without a purpose. You have given my life a meaning, a direction. You lead and guide me and because you are my sherperd, i am not lost. Jehovah i adore you.
I call you by your names Lord. And i declare that in heaven and on earth and beneath the earth, there is no other God! You are my God, my rock and my shield .

You might think He hasnt done anything for you, but just look around you, think very well...what is Jehovah to you?

*If all the hair on my head were like tongues, they would not be enough to praise you

*Lord of all Lords, king of all kings

*The Lord I AM THAT I AM!

Writefreak Rants!

2009-11-02T16:38:00.004+01:00

It's a rant...if you don't want to read a rant, don't read...

Why is my househelp stupid? I mean seriously, why? You send her to do something, she comes back with something else? Is she dumb or what? You see, thats why i don't think i could ever have a live in help cos i just might maim someone! She only comes once a week and she gives me this much stress already...what's going on with the girl sef?

Two weeks ago, i sent her to the market cos i only needed to buy a few things. Let's call her J. J, please buy goat meat and turkey and i took the pains to write it all down and when through it with her. J, is that ok? Yes ma, she says and leaves. She comes back and i'm too lazy to check what she bought, was working on something so i said well, put it all in the freezer. J goes home. Fastoforward to evening, i want to cook the turkey and i can't find it, and i'm wondering what's going on...i see a tin of turkey oil in my store and i'm wondering how the heck did this get here? I thought someone gave the Mr as a gift...i kept looking in the freezer and thought i'd call to ask her exactly where she kept it. I decided to use the goat meat instead. The bag was black that it was in, i wanted to make pepper goat meat, my husband loves it...i opened the bag and i was just in shock..J bought beef, dear God, has she got cotton in her ears? So i can't hold on any longer, i call her and she said no man, na goat meat i buy, i say J are you alright? And where's my turkey? J says it's in the store, ok...i won't kill someone in Jesus name! J fall my hand, i just dropped the call while she was saying sorry ma (gosh, i will so slap that girl if she says another sorry ma...what is wrong with her?) and i made do with the beef!

So why am i ranting today? I sent J to the market again cos i had an appointment and seriously i just didn't want the stress ( i should have known better!)...i write a list; beef (not goat meat this time since she likes beef although we don't really eat red meat), turkey ( dear old turkey) and some dried fish. J, do you understand? Yes Ma, we go over it several times, she even asks me where she's not sure of what i wrote. I go for my appointment, i come back, she's not back. I have a headache and want to sleep but she's not back so i wait up..J comes back and i decide to check everything she bought...oh yes J bought everything and bought turkey alright, only this time the turkey was chicken. For crying out loud, pls help me ask this child, how does chicken look like turkey??? And i asked her, she insisted it was turkey! Miss, is something wrong with you? Is it today i started cooking turkey? I check again and the drumsticks convince me it's chicken. J says i'm sorry ma and i lose it. I yell at her and asks her how she managed it, she says they showed her and she chose what she wanted and thought was turkey, pls what happened to asking? I even told her where to go since i've been to the market with her sooo many times! I've sent her back with it to the market...i don't care how she sorts it out but she has to learn that she can't continue working with me and remain stupid...cos that's just plain stupid! So much for me not wanting to stress is why i didn't go to the market.

An old friend (are we even friends) and i chat briefly, i ask about her husband and she says oh he's fine and so is my daughter...please, who asked her? I didn't even know she has a daughter, you didn't even tell me! Why should i ask about a daughter i don't know..then i say oh my bad, you have a daughter now, and she goes oh, so you didn't know, thought i told everyone, it's my bad..what nonsense! Maybe i'm overreacting but excuse me, should you not tell me you have a daughter before i can ask about her? And i didn't ask so you might as well have said i have a daughter now..

Ok, deep breath! Wf...calm down, ok...i feel better already, now that i let it all out..

Hope you all had nice weekends and please don't ever employ a J, it can be dangerous to your health!

Has God forgotten Me? Should I Praise Him?

2009-10-21T07:52:00.001+01:00

I've found myself asking this same question so many times. Has God forgotten me? Does God even remember me? Does He care about what i want? Will He come through for me? Then i top it up with the big question, well if God really cares for me, if He really listens to my prayers, then when? I bet i'm not alone in asking these questions. A lot of us have asked them so many times. Sometimes we even think, if only He could just show me the end, then i would be able to believe and hold on.

Wait right there, I want to see the end before believing? Isn't that what i just said? Who or what tells me the end? The truth is that the answer to my question has already been provided in the word of God. The bible says 'faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen'. The bible is saturated with examples of people who believed against all odds or physical evidences. Perfect example, give me father Abraham anyday, he was Abram.

He couldn't see where God was taking Him just yet and then someday, the Lord Jehovah needed to work on His imagination, He took him out, He told him to look at the stars in the heaven, his descendants were going to be as many as the stars he couldn't count. I can imagine Abram then telling God come on, you're the biggest joker! God needed to work on his mind to get him to the point he needed to get to. Then, Abraham saw it, he caught a picture of himself the way God saw him, his name changed. He became the father of many nations. I bet he got really mocked by people around him, he's childless and he calls himself a father of many nations. He didn't consider the mockery, his wife's name even got changed, she became Sarah from Sarai, the queen of princesses. Wow! they saw, and gradually, they became!Faith calls the things that are not like they are ( faith does not call the things that are as they are not, note!).That means i really don't have to see the physical picture or see the desired end before i believe, that is just contrary to what the bible says. It is contrary to what God's word says.

I only need to go to the word, find what it says concerning my situation, and i stay with it, paint a picture of what it says in my mind, keep thinking about it, not letting it leave me, then one day, it will happen, what i desire will manifest in the physical, halleluyah!God's word has the answers to any situation of life, nothing escapes Him and He is very interested in every area of our lives. How long do i need to hold on for? How long do i need to believe for? Oh, for as long as it takes!

Unfortunately, being in and out of faith only tends to prolong our waiting days. It's like trying to jumpstart a car and putting it in reverse, everytime it attemps to move, you're back to the beginning ( i wonder if this analogy makes sense). When you step out of faith, you undo all the good you've done and you have to start again! I think i'd rather just stay in faith then so i can cut short my waiting time...It's not the easiest thing to do, but faith sure works..sometimes we get discouraged and then start asking why do we need to go through our situations?

Why do i need to have extra faith for what others seem to get so easy? Well, welcome to the real world. The person probably has something they want so desperately that they don't have to and even if they don't, comparison only makes you and i fools according to the word of God. We're running different races, so don't compare! Is God the reason you don't have what you want? No, God never tempts us with evil. Sin came into the world and all other tribulations with it which is why we must recreate our world with the word of God. When

God wanted to create, what did He do? He spoke! The bible says '....we believe and so we speak'. Speak to me for five minutes and i can tell what you believe already! You can't tell me you have faith and confess negative things. No! That is not faith...faith speaks! You can't not speak if you have faith. The devil will paint pictures in your mind, you must be ready to reply him, speak! What do you speak? The word of God!Has God forgotten you and i? No..the bible says He has us etched in the palm of His hands. He has the number of hairs on our heads numbered to the last one, come on, He cares! He has loved us with an everlasting love.

God is not a wicked God, He has given us all that pertains to life and godliness. He only asks us to have faith, it is the heavenly currency in exchange for all He has already done. I bet sometimes when we pray, God shakes His head and says if only you knew it was yours already, if only you stopped praying in unbelief and give me some faith. I have done it, it's yours for the taking.You might say Writefreak is going all preachy, well, these are the things God is teaching me and i'm on a journey of faith with Him. Very soon, I will share a testimony with you all...and then, i will tell you more about holding on because very soon, very soon, there shall be a performance of the things God has spoken. Halleluyah! God is not a wicked God, He does not want us to suffer and He is not the reason some things are not working out, although He will eventually use it for His glory if we bring faith to the table. So there, we have the answer to my first paragraph, unbelief is what gives birth to those questions.Have a believing rest of the week people.

Oh it's Wednesday and for these things i am thankful...

I thank God for a very very dear person to my heart put to bed safely and i have the honour of being godmother. Lord my heart is filled with joy for this little one that you have blessed my friend's family with and i am just honoured and awed that i'm a part of it, thank you Lord.

I'm thankful for a wonderful group of women God brought me in touch with to stir up my faith. My steps are indeed being ordered by the Lord.

I'm grateful for my marriage, my husband is a solid rock and i will never take it for granted. It amazes me everytime people ask us if we're still newly weds, it's your doing father and i am indeed grateful.

I'm grateful to God because He is never late and He always appears right on the scene.

I'm thankful for my health and wellbeing and of those close to me. It is indeed a blessing...

What are you thankful for?

Are You Tired?

2009-10-08T09:39:00.001+01:00

'Do not be weary in well doing for you shall reap if you faint not'
Sola was a very diligent teacher, she got to work before everyone else, wrote her lesson notes, gave her students the most attention and did her job with all the passion in her. She was indeed a model teacher. She did this for years with little or no increase in her salary, she persevered, then in her 7th year, she got tired. Why did she have to work so hard for no recognition and very little pay.

She got slack in writing her lesson notes. The principal of her school noticed something was wrong and asked her about it, she made light of it. Soon, she started getting to school late, she missed classes. The principal told her sadly she had to be queried. She shrugged as the principal talked to her.She got the query.

Unknown to Sola, the principal had recommended her to the committee choosing the most diligent teachers in the city and were going to promote them two levels above where their present ones. There was cash reward, a travels company was going to give her a fully paid vacation and she would get a lot of things she could only dream of all these years.

The day approached fast that the nominated teachers would be observed and the principal tried her best to warn Sola.The day the inspection team came, Sola got to the school around 10 a.m, she had woken up so late. principal had made excuses for her to them and a number of other teachers turned their noses up at her.

The head of the committee spoke to Sola about why they were there, she started to panic in her heart and wondered if she could find the good teacher in her again, the one who only knew how to do her job well.She was asked for her lesson notes, she looked ashamed as they asked. She had not written her lesson notes in two weeks. The inspector sighed. That was a major criteria to qualify for the reward.

Other teachers had been interviewed, only fifty percent of them said she was as diligent, some even said the principal was partial to her because they were related. Most of them hated her for her diligence, some wanted to be like her.The inspectors checked the 'Time book' and found her name for three weeks, she had arrived late to work every single day. They decided to flip back and saw that for so many months back, she had a punctual trend. The lead inspector looked into her eyes and said 'you would have qualified'.He shook his head and left.

The principal took Sola aside and spoke to her. Sola cried and asked why she had not been given a heads up. The older woman patted her on the back and said 'my dear, integrity is who you are when no one is looking'. Sola nodded, lesson learnt but it had cost her so much, a reward she would have gotten for all those years of service. This was definitely a very hard way to learn her lesson.(For some of you who might want a happy ending for Sol..lol, some months down the line, she got recommended for a promotion, just a level ahead but it was better than nothing..lol).
Temi's wife was very cantankerous. He showed her all the love and affection he could, he pleaded with her, they went for counselling and in all her 'madness', Temi remained faithful and gentle. He was praying that God would turn his wife's heart and make her see her wrong ways, but it was taking too long. He needed an answer NOW. The answer wasn't coming, he decided to go out more. He met new people, he drank a bit more.

Then he met this sweet lady. She was everything he could wish for in a woman, they took things slowly at first. Temi's wife was staying home more, she was more quiet when he got home and she wasn't complaining but he was always too tired to notice. A change was coming over the woman he had been praying for for several months but Temi was unaware. He decided to take his relationship with the 'sweet lady' further, he made love to her. He was a godly man and his heart was heavy as he left her that night. His conscience was heavy, cheating was below him as a child of God. Then an anger came over him towards his wife. She led him into this, didn't she?

When he got home, he found a note from his wife in the living room, she praised him for being the most tolerant man on earth, she begged for his forgiveness and said ''you're the best man in the whole world, another man would have gone ahead to have an affair in all the time you stood faithfully by me, praying for me to have a change of heart''. Sola put down the paper as deep sorrow welled over him. He should just have waited a little bit longer, he told himself, just a little bit longer'.

The bible verse above is self explanatory. In recent times, I have had to welcome a number of guests to my house, family and friends, staying and passing by. I had had enough, then some friends told me they were travelling over for the weekend. I was too tired and every attempt to make them back off wasn't working. I decided to fib a little, i wasn't going to be around. But my conscience pricked me and i told them they could come. I complained to a friend who said 'pls try your best to entertain, you never know when an angel is passing by your house, Sarah entertained an angel'. Well said. A few days later, i was chatting with Rita and she said the same thing to me. I told God, point noted, thank you very much.

Am i saying it's comfortable? No way! Will I have guests right now, no please although my sister is coming in this week for a few days to do something important. My choice will be not to entertain anyone for a while. I want my space...I have decided not to entertain any guests (at least live in ones for a while) and if I do allow them to come, I must not complain. If iI don't say no, then it's totally ok by me and who knows, one of them might just be an angel :-)
What is that thing you have done for so long and it seems no reward is coming? You're about to throw in the towel...maybe hold on just a bit, your angel might be around the corner...that's what the good book says!

For a demand that is constantly placed on you, you probably have a special gift in that area, pay attention to it. It might be the key to your blessing. Selah

Have a fantastic weekend!

The Day Writefreak Became Friends With The Nigerian Police...

2009-09-26T12:32:00.002+01:00

We have two apologies or are they excuses for gatemen. They don't know their jobs and when you decide to spell their duties out to them, they always have a reason to do contrary to what you tell them.

One is perpetually drunk, i am not exaggerating; morning, afternoon, night but he never agrees that he's drunk. If he's not sleeping, he'l lying down in the gatehouse with a woman (yes, hubby has had to wake him up to come open the gate beside a woman before!) . The other is a regular at the village close to us. I suppose he sees like minded people there but then he is employed to watch our gate, not to fraternise with villagers. Their sins are too many, i don't want to bore you with all the details. One thing is sure though, they are sorry excuses for gatemen or security.

A few days ago, our living room lock decided to act up and they key wouldn't turn. It was a Sunday and it was Sallah so we couldn't get anyone to come fix it. It wasn't so much of an issue, we live in a very secure area. I can confess that there are times i'm home alone that i've forgotten to lock the door. There's a main bullet proof door that serves as the entrance to the four apartments in our building, we all neglect to lock it atimes. I told hubby to make sure it was locked that night and we went to bed.

As our custom is (we're both night owls), we went to bed very late and then at about 2 a.m, there was a knock on our bedroom window. Yes, the gateman was knocking the window of our bedroom to answer your question! We happen to live downstairs. HUbby went to ask him what was up, it was the perpetually drunk one, let's call him N, he said his colleague S was ill and lying on the floor sick. Hubby wanted to know exactly what was wrong with him, the guy couldn't tell so he went to the fridge and brought out mist mag and panadol. The guy should choose his poison. He was on his way back from the kitchen when N started shouting 'oga', 'oga' (pronounced the northern way...lol)..there are people with him and i can't go there'. That was a bit scary, then he started shouting round the house, calling for hubby to come out. We heard him arguing with someone so hubby decided to stay put.

In the confusion,hubby told me to get in the guest bathroom and i locked myself in. I had started shaking and trying to remind myself of scriptures i know about protection and safety...lol...I looked up and the window of the bathroom was slightly open, some wiring was passed through there, i couldn't stay on my own, no way!I went out and hubby had locked the bedroom door, i started knocking, he asked to make sure i was alone..lol..scary cat! Thankfully a friend who is out of the country left his car with us and we could set the panic button without going out....(we have to get in our own car to set the alarm) so hubby let the alarm go off continously while he called our neighbours on the phone, they were also awake.

I have some numbers for the police on my phone, a friend who had a theft episode in her house last year gave the numbers to me. She had told me she called the police and they came, i thought it wasn't possible and only took the numbers with a pinch of salt. Hubby took the numbers and called the police, they asked for directions to our place. I also had the police commissioner's number, i called him but my voice was shaking, hubby took the phone and spoke to him so coherently. Honestly, i don't know how he does it but he was so in control! I'm proud of my man.I lay on the bed while he continued setting off the alarms, checking the window and calling the police.

Not too long after the calls, we heard a siren, they called to make sure they were on the right street, and when they heard the car alarm, they stopped in front of our house. It was like watching a movie! From our bedroom window, i saw armed policemen come in and search the premises for any intruders. Oh by the way, they fired two shots outside the gate before they came in.They searched the whole place and then called hubby it was ok to come out. Hubby and the neighbour upstairs went out to meet them. They came in three cars and there were ten of them, wow!The commissioner called back to find out if we had seen his men, we told him yes. The lady upstairs and i chatted about the incident on the phone while our husbands were out talking to the policemen.

Whoever the intruders were had left probably when the car alarm started going off. The mazing thing is a female police officer had to pour water on the second gateman to wake up after they forced the gate open. They advised us to get better security, he was obviously drunk!It didn't end there, a few minutes later, another batch of policemen came to make sure everything was fine. Honestly, i was wowed, i didn't think things like that happen in this beloved country of ours. I guess you nevere know until you try.

One thing is sure, our gatemen are going to be fired and replaced and we're going to get some kinda civil defence or mobile police patrol (yeah, i live with influential people who can get them without hassles..hahaha)...So i think the Nigerian police is really my friend afterall. If there was any grudge i had against them, i forgave that night.

When everything calmed down, hubby then started feeling tired, he had been a real man through it all and i had been a 'shaky shaky' real woman, although i tried to appear calm on the surface. The idiotic gateman had apparently opened all our living room windows from outside while he was shouting 'oga, oga' and nobody came out. That was such a foolish act on his part and honestly i think he would have attempted to come in if we hadn't locked the bullet proof door.Thank God for safety, thank God because His promises to watch over us day and night (He neither sleeps nor slumbers) were kept and thank God for the Nigerian police!

Have a nice and safe weekend everyone!

Tell Them...

2009-09-16T09:13:00.004+01:00

We all have people who are dear to our hearts, people we care about and who care about us in return but sometimes we never really know if these people care or they probably never know that we do..

We all go about our ways and we act normal and then when something happens to someone you love, you start thinking about them and taking stock and wondering about your relationship with them over the years. You even assess or wonder if there's something you could have done differently.

I'm against the culture that celebrates someone only after they are long gone and they don't need your praise. By long gone, it could be dead or far away from you. True the saying goes absence makes the mind grow fonder but sometimes i wonder if it really does, does it not just widen the gap? I'm not sure.

I'm not sure why a lot of people have parties when their older people die with the kind of amounts that those people might never have heard about in all their lifetime. When they're alive or around us, it doesn't mean much but once they leave, we start to eulogise and say how much of good people they were. Tell me, of what use is it to them then?

For a lot of us, it's an assumption that our loved ones know we care about them. We justify our actions, if i didn't care for her, would i have done this or that? How do i know if you don't tell me? The best way i can know is if you tell me.

There are so many people in our everyday lives that we take for granted and just never show appreciation to. How about that househelp that makes sure your house is tidy although she gets on your nerves. The issue is right now, all you see is the things she hasn't done, you forget so many the good. How about your gardener, the one who makes sure your house is not overgrown with weed, yes you pay him but a word of appreciation or a pat on the back once in a while never hurt anybody. How about your co worker who makes sure your project is off the ground because you need help. Oh well, you could have done it alone, but he still helped didn't he? What about your husband/wife? Oh gosh, he's just so annoying, do they not have any good sides? If they died today, would you or not sing their praise? If they suddenly walked out on you, will there be a gap or not?

It doesn't have to be an eulogy. It does not have to be poetic. Even a thank you at the right time will go a long way in saying how much we appreciate the other person.

How about telling people that we appreciate them right when they are there or very present in our lives and not when we lose them.

I'm going to practise my own preaching and say thank you blogville, i appreciate you, you're the reason Writefreak is here! And for those bloggers who have moved from bloggers to friends...oh, you guys are the best! You make it worthwhile being here! Love you all :-)

Have a blessed rest of the week!

Thankful Wednesday + the moving out question.

2009-09-02T11:25:00.005+01:00

It's another Wednesday, another day to be thankful to God. As always I have soooo MANY reasons to be thankful.

I decided since i haven't posted in a while, this is not only going to be a thankful post....

I'm grateful for the gift of life. It's the 2nd of September, the year is flying by so fast and through the months my family, friends and i have been preserved, long life is a convenant and I thank God that He is fulfilling His part of it.

I'm thankful for a revelation of God's word and my rights in Christ Jesus. Often times, we Christians allow things in our lives, things that shouldn't be there. I'm learning to check what God's word says about a situation afresh and declaring it over that situation. Thank you Lord

I'm thankful for a loving husband and a good marriage..
I'm thankful for good and godly friends...
I'm thankful for open doors...i didn't even need to knock on some...
I'm thankful for letting God use me as a vessel...
I'm thankful for my aburo Temite, the time she spent her and her safe journey back. My sister also travelled several hours by road and she got safely to her destination.
So much to thank God for,what are you thankful for?

So i have a question for you guys...

Is it ok for a woman well over 30 to still live with her parents and have to live there because her father will not hear of her moving out on her own at her age? Is it even ok at all for a 36 year old woman to still live with her parents?

I find this hard to relate to because i left home when i was 22 and i lived on my own from then till i got married. No, my parents don't live in the West, they live here in Nigeria. I was moving to a different city though, they raised some dust initially but we came to an agreement and they let me be.

We had this argument in my house some weeks back, some friends were present and they thought it was ok for a woman to live with her parents no matter how old she is if she is unmarried. So even if she is 40 and marriage is not on the horizon, she should live with her parents?

They said our culture does not allow for a woman to live on her own and it's almost a taboo. I remember my Grandma said it was irresponsible for a single lady to live on her own but hey i proved them all wrong. I don't think it's a good thing to think a woman should be dependent on her parents while a man is allowed to spread his wings and fly.

I understand that there are different roles men and women play in the society and the family but i also think when it gets to a certain age, it becomes control when your parents can still tell you what to do and how to live your life. Heck at 36, your father still dictates how you live your life.

I'm of the opinion that living alone matures you, it helps you gain some level of independence and maturity you might not otherwise have gained. I think when it gets to a certain age, if a parent cannot trust their kids to make the right decisions, then they have failed in their roles as stewards over them.

Lemme not talk too much, would love to hear what you guys think about this.

Hope you guys have had a fabulous week so far. Happy midweek!

I'm a Witness!

2009-08-19T08:36:00.011+01:00

Good morning daddy,
How're you today? How's the saviour of my soul, your only son Jesus? How're the angels especially the one called Michael? I'm sure heaven is as peaceful as ever and prettier than i ever imagines it to be.

It's been a minute since I gave thanks through this medium. I've been so busy but not too busy for you Lord, you know how grateful I am to you in my heart (or am i?). I probably have whined at you in the past few weeks for some odd reasons, dear Lord, forgive me...

I'm grateful to you for who YOU are...you have many names Lord, and you continue to show me the meaning of those names. You're rapha - my healer, Jireh- you provide for me, Shalom- you give me peace. So many names Lord, some I don't even know the meaning...but one thing is sure, you always step up for me even when I haven't seriously asked for help. You're my hope...

Everytime I have the opportunity to think, I can't help noticing I have one of the very best husbands in the world, a supportive man. You gave me my very own personal and customised cheerleader...thank you for a working marriage and a man that believes the best of and with me ALL THE TIME. It's something I couldn't buy Lord.

My family is well, no one is ill, oh they complain as all humans do but seriously, they have no major issues...and for that i am thankful.

Thank you Lord for always using us as a blessing to somebody. Sometimes i feel like there are too many people asking to be 'helped' or 'blessed' but then it's a priviledge and i'm just so grateful we're not on the other side. Isn't it even more blessed to give than to receive?

I prayed for a certain someone dear to my heart, when all looked bleak and it looked like there would be no breakthrough, you assured me there would be a good end. I am starting to see it, infact, a miracle has happened already. Thank you Lord, i will keep trusting. You're the God who works miracles.

I'm grateful for the doors of opportunity...i'm a writer, you told me to stay in my place and look what you'remaking of me. You're opening doors that even if i knocked by myself might have remained shut. I always see your hands Lord.

I thank you Lord for my friend aloted, for that day years ago that we met and for the friendship we share...words cannot express how grateful i am for this friend like a sister that you have given me!

So many things to thank you for Lord, I thank you for the opportunity to think and find reasons to be thankful. There are more Lord but let me mention these few so the person reading this can add their own reasons.
Thank you Lord.

Before you append your signature...

2009-08-10T09:43:00.006+01:00

Gosh ,been wanting to blog for some days but it's been so busy. I'm on a two week project but it almost feels like i've been on it for ages. I have a number of things I really would love to talk about but ....

You have to stand for what you believe. Don't let yourself be cheated. Oh and I also learnt a lesson, no matter how well you know a person, a verbal agreement is never good enough in business. I embarked on the project because I had agreed the duration and I gave them my bill which was slashed a bit but it was ok. I kept asking for my contract but I didn't get it till the third or fourth day into the project.

To say i was shocked would be an understatement. In the morning, I got a call and I was told the pay had been slashed, I was like what! Why would you do that after I embarked on the project. Guy says it's beyond him, budget was slashed and i should decide what i want to do. I was so upset, I just had to tell him to end the call. Then I got the contract and they had merged two jobs into one and extended the length of my contract by two weeks, oh and by the way, one third of my pay was slashed.

My advice, always read a contract before you sign it. Never ever sign something you haven't read. It can get you in trouble. I got the contract and read every line, thank God I did. I used to be so careless about things like that. I was so mad after reading. Like, seriously, what are they thinking? Do they think I'm an idiot or some naive person.

I tried to calm down and called the guy aside, he was trying to fob me off and tell me how things change in production and how budget has been cut. I was like so, i should be your scapegoat? Well, I gave him back the contract and demanded that our agreement be put down in black and white or I was walking. I already knew I had lost some of the money.

I sent hubby a text and he came online, he advised to do things calmly and not shut the door and talked me through it. Gosh, that guy sure knows how to diffuse my fire and make me calm down. I should be blowing him kisses, my ever wise man who is always there for me...i digreee...

Anyway, the guy says ok, i'll talk to the boss and see what comes out of it. I said ok, i would appreciate that. I took hubby's advise and tried to be as calm as possible about things. Typical WF might have brought down the roof..lol..well not in the real sense...but erm 'cough, cough'.

Men, it's not good to be upset o, I instantly developed a headache while all that was going on. I managed to act normally till the end of the day. The following day, I got my contract back and oh yeah I got what i wanted with an explanation that the pay had to be cut because the budget was cut short. I had gotten most of what I asked for. It was a compromise but it was good enough. I was glad I demanded and got what I wanted.

Next time I'm doing a project, I'm definitely going to be signing the contract beforehand. I advise you do the same, people are always looking for someone to take advantage of, not me though.

Ok I gotta roll, I'm in the middle of coming up with a story with a group of people, writing it down and blogging at the same time while chatting to my friend on Gtalk. WF sure is the epitome of multitasking. lol

Have a good week everyone!

Guilty as Charged!

2009-08-02T21:15:00.001+01:00

I left home a long time ago, in the real sense of it. Once i graduated from Uni, i stayed a few months at home and that was it, I moved away to make my own life. I chose not to stay with any relatives in the new city i moved to. God was good to me, I met some nice people but my decision brought some consequences (which are not the purpose of this post).

I think I'm quite independent, I don't know...anyway so I went home only once in a while. At a point, I made sure I went like every quarter. I tried to be there for my family but I'm not sure I was present enough. I don't know once again..lol

I got married and the visits became less frequent, did i say it wasn't so frequent before? My husband always asked me when I would visit my folks and didn't even mind if i left him home alone. It's just me, I hate travelling by road or more like siting in one place for a long time.

Last year, I wasn't home at all though I saw both my parents on a number of occasions and they were at my house. I kept saying I'd go until we had to move and the journey of 3 hours by road became 7 hours. It was longer. From the beginning of the year, I'd been saying I would go home but I kept pushing it. I've been avoiding a confrontation with my parents over a certain issue and I know going to their camp would bring me face to face with it. My husband would say when your parents are alive is the only time you love and be there for them. Bein an orphan, he knows how important it is to be there for one's parents.

Last week, my mum mentioned that my dad had malaria, so i called him. He sounded chirpy on the phone and I didn't think it was a big deal. I promptly forgot about it and didnt call them for a few days. Then, my mum called and asked why I didn't even bother to call my dad back to find out how he was doing. I apologised and said I forgot cos he sounded very well on the phone. She said it got worse, then she gave him the phone and he mentioned something about fainting. I was like no, what happened, he said not to worry, he was fine.

I couldn't sleep well that night. I deliberated on making the long journey and hubby encouraged me to do it. I packed a change of cloth in my handbag and made the trip. I called my mum, it was meant to be a surprise for my dad but my sister ruined it by telling him.

I met him recuperating. He was prescribed Piriton but the nurse wrote for him a wrong dosage which is definitely too much at his age. He was home alone and thought my mum got back from work so he went to open the gate and slumped. Dear Lord, i am eternally grateful for saving him. The floor is concrete. He could have hit his head. He passed out for a few minutes and by himself, he woke up and made it to back into the house. He then fell at the dining again; another thing that could have been disastrous because the floor is just tiles.

Mum met him half awake and felt his pulse. He said it doesn't take long to die. My mum said she rejected it and told him to get his act together because she didn't make such a covenant with God when she was leaving the house. He was going nowhere. She gave hm Lucozade and made him a meal and kept talking to him till she was sure he was fully recovered.

How do I thank God enough? I pray for my family all the time and I know this is a dividend of prayer. Please cover your family in prayers all the time, it's very important. Above all, I've decided, I can't be so far from my folks anymore, I would visit at least once in a quarter...I call them all the time, no problem with that. Hubby and I are also thinking of sending them both for full body exams and suggesting they get a maid. Mum is chief DIY but she's getting older. The woman needs to know she's no spring chicken anymore.

I can't believe how guilty I felt and I just thank God nothing happened to him. We still had the conversation I was avoiding but it didn't kill me. I'm so glad I made the trip although I spent about 14 hours or a bit less on the road in less than 48 hours. Like i told them, it's not how long I stay that counts, it's the thought and the fact that I was there and they saw me. I thank God.

Got Mercy in Your Bowels?

2009-07-29T11:18:00.006+01:00

Bode was your driver, he drove you everywhere, sometimes took your friend to places and sometimes, he drove your kids and family members around. He worked with you for about two years and he never once changed his slippers. Yeah, he changed it once, someday you were going for an occasion and you thought it would be a disgrace to have someone like that seen in association with you.

Tola lives in your neighbourhood, she is of school age but she doesn't go to school. 'Why do some people just waste their lives'? You say and then move on to your daily activities. Everytime you see her, you keep wondering, can't she go to school already or find something to do with her life? You shrug.

Your housemaid has been living with you for some months and still wears the same clothes she brought from the village a few months back. Oh and everytime you remember to tell her she is stinking and her clothes are too dirty. You scream at her for having improper behaviour. She continues working with you, and her life never gets any improvement, she has no education and you can't even let her learn a trade...hmmm.

Remember how your parents strugled and paid your way through school, when you graduated, they heaved a sigh of relief. You live in the city now, you have a good job, a comfortable life, well you're not the best among your peers yet but you can afford your three meals and some excesses. Your parents hardly hear from you and when you give them anything, it's because the guilt has almost eaten you up. I shudder.

Your gateman keeps opening your gate, and you don't even know what's going on with him. He looks perpetually sad but you never notice, you're too much in a hurry to go out and come in anyway. Why bother with someone who can't find something better to do with his life?

It's an endless list of things we notice but refuse to notice or more like our lives are too busy to notice. We go on about our lives, it's all about me, myself and I. So long as I'm fine and my immediate family is doing well, glory to God, we can sleep at night.

Do you know what the bible calls true religion? You who goes to church every Sunday but refuses to be a blessing to anyone around you. Trust me, there's someone around you who needs you, who needs something you have. Please, go read James chapter 1, true religion is in caring for the widows, helping the helpless.

I remember Jesus saying how He would cast out people because when he was hungry, thirsty or needed help, they refused to help Him. They'd ask when was this, and He would say, when you didn't do it to any of your brothers, well you didn't do it to me. And He would openly welcome those who have helped out a neighbour, given them a drink, fed the hungry, visited the prisoners, he would welcome them because they did it for Him.

When you can help your brother or sister out, why not do it, instead of praying hypocritical prayers that God should help them solve their problems when the answers lie with you. What good is throwing away your leftovers when your neighbour (not necessarily someone living in your house) is hungry and can't even afford a meal? How rich is your life when no one wakes up in the morning and is able to thank God for you? It doesn't have to be huge but your life needs to be a blessing or it's wasting.

Do you remember the story of Lazarus and the rich man? I bet I don't need to recount it. The bible encourages us to do good to those around us especially those who are in the household of faith.

Don't shut your bowels of mercy. When you see that hungry guy, be nice, that thirsty guy, be nice, you never know when God is testing you and sending an angel your way. And even if it's not an angel, don't you have a thrill when you do something great for someone and they're too blessed they don't know what to say? Selah

PS: This post was inspired by the message my pastor preached on Sunday. I'm still working at it myself!

I'm Grateful!

2009-07-22T22:41:00.005+01:00

I will bless the Lord at all times and His praises will continually be on my lips. No matter what my situation or circumstance is, i will bless the Lord. He alone is worthy of praise, honour and adoration. The Lord who shut the mouth of the lions and preserved Daniel in the lion's den is worthy of my praise.

Lord I could go on and on about the wonderful things I read in the word that you have done, infact I could recount a lot of impossible things I have heard you did...I would write a whole page and there would still be more, He is worthy of praise.

I'm grateful for life. Only the living can praise the Lord, only the living have plans and goals. Only the living have a purpose and can think of fulfilling. I thank you Lord that I have life, my family members and friends have life. I praise you.

I'm thankful for my marriage and for a wonderful man who is able to share his heart with me. I thank you father because you keep showing me what love is all about and how to love. I thank you Lord because I have a great marriage and I do not take it for granted.

I'm thankful for doors of opportunity that you're opening. You're the one who opens doors and no man can shut them. I am indeed grateful Lord for the contacts you're giving me. You have set before me an open door and no man can shut it, halleluyah!

I thank you Lord for direction. Your word says I will hear a voice saying this is the way, walk in it, you keep nudging me in the right direction and giving me instructions. For this Lord I am grateful. I thank you that I am not without help.

I'm thankful that I found the car key I was looking for today. I searched everywhere two days ago after i misplaced it but you quietly assured me that I didn't need to stress, I would find it, you made your word good and today, it was right there in the corner pocket of my bag, peeping at me.

Thank you Lord for safe journeys for both my sisters who did a lot of travelling this weekend. I also thank you for keeping my husband in his going out and coming in, he travels a lot but you preserve him, halleluyah!

Thank you Lord for the many answered prayers, even the littlest ones, I don't take for granted. You're a faithful God. I thank you for everyone who will read this post, may they be able to count their blessings. Halleluyah! You're a good God.

Now I'm here...then I'm not...

2009-07-17T10:11:00.007+01:00

Earlier this year, I found it easy to update twice a week, i would do a thankful Wednesday post and another post on Sunday or some other day of the week. It came naturally and I was sure I could keep it up. It was with the same optimisim that I started the year that I was blogging. I had so much energy.

I suddenly found myself not updating in a week or in two weeks. It's becoming consistent and now that I'm thinking about it, it's probably something permeating other areas of my life. I don't have as much energy as i did and I need to get it back. It only took my laptop falling ill to fall into a total blog drought. I'm not motivated to update my blog, I'm not motivated to read other blogs.

A few people (bloggers) have asked me what is going on and the truth is, I don't know. I just don't feel up to doing my blog rounds. Please bear with me, maybe I will get my groove back and come to all your blogs and leave comments. I've even read some posts recently and i just didn't feel like leaving comments so i quietly shut the door and walked away. Maybe it's not even a lack of energy, maybe I sometimes get very busy and blogging seems to be taking too much time.

I'm not quitting blogging, I blog because I love to write. I'm just going through a phase that will hopefully pass. Writefreak wants her blogging mojo back but it seems it's not coming back. I think it's something that has to do with more than blogging. Ok, I think I'm rambling as I usually do.

Yesterday I let things get to me, I broke down and stayed in the dumps, the whole day passed and I didn't even have a meal but by the end of the day I was out of it, I'm grateful for that.

Something great happened to me last week. I have a friend, we were best friends in JS 1 to 3 and then we both changed schools and managed to keep in touch for a little while. In those days, there were only handwritten letters, I think we got tired of sending letters back and forth. I ran into her sometime in the late 90s but we didn't talk much and that was the last time I saw her. Last week I started thinking about her, I looked on fb, I didn't see her. It occured to me she might be married and she won't even bear the same surname anymore. I asked someone who thought she could find her, she said she would try to find her. Then four days later, I ran into her in a restaurant, just like that! She lives in this city with her husband and her twins. It was a happy reunion. We've been hooking up since then. It's like picking up from where we stopped and it's amazing that we just found each other like that.

We found a church that we're at home in here in Abuja and it's cool. We didn't want to sample too many churches and God led us to the right one.

My neighbour's children are on hols and they're driving me nuts. I love them but they can be annoying because they're quite rude and don't listen to instructions which drives me up the wall. Yesterday, the oldest one knocked for several hours and I just plain refused to open the door cos I needed to get some work done. Can someone please tell schools to reopen? The summer break has got to be over already.

I'll try swing by your blogs...I have a lot of work on my plate...and it's not going to get lighter. It's good I guess.

See you around!

What's in a Name?

2009-07-07T09:26:00.004+01:00

When someone says Writefreak, i answer, even if it's not on blogville because it's something associated with me. It's a name I have chosen to give myself and everytime I hear it, it reminds me of something I am committed to. When I hear Writefreak, my head goes...you write and you can't but write, infact you're a writing freak. If someone calls we Writefreak atimes and I haven't put pen to paper in a while, I kinda start to feel guilty. That's me, case in point.

When I hear Joy, I tend to expect that the person bearing the name exudes joy, or at least brings you some form of happiness...don't blame me, blame the person who named them Joy. lol....There are often times you see someone acting contrary to their name and we tend to think, how can her name even be this? I'm not automatically saying your name determines who you are or are not but a name is an identity.

For a few years, I've heard people name their kids and the thought in my head is 'what were they thinking'? When a child is named, it's like a prophecy, it's more than just something to call the child. Why do we avoid cursing ourselves or using negative words on ourselves especially as Christians? Because we know the power of life and death is in the tongue and the bible lets us know that those who love it will eat the fruit thereof. I don't want to be calling my child any name that makes no sense.

In the days of the bible, whenever God wanted to change a man's life, He changed His name. He changed Abram to Abraham, he became a father of many nations. Sarai his wife became Sarah, God changed her name and changed her story. He changed Jacob's name to Israel because Jacob met with God. Jabez's name was not recorded as literally changed but I remember the bible saying his name meant sorrow. What kind of a mother names her child sorrow? His life was hopeless, going nowhere cos the sorrow followed him about until he called out to God and then he became more honourable than his brothers (1 chroniceles 4:8 -11). What's in a name you ask?

Saul became Paul when his days of persecuting Christians became over. His name changed and his life and lifestly change. He became the most popular Apostle....there are a lot of examples in the bible, these are only a few.

I'm not totally for changing surnames because I believe some people have carried it to an extreme and I believe when you become a child of God, your history changes and your past becomes hidden under the blood of the lamb. I understand that for some people though, there is a need to change their names. They need something symbolic to know they have escaped their past and hey it happened a lot in the bible. It's a matter of personal conviction i guess...

What I don't understand is people who have a choice giving their children names that will affect their self esteem. Aside the spiritual implications of the name, there's also the psychological implications. We all know how people get taunted by their names in school. Classmates can be mean, who wants their child to be the object of some mean children's bullying?

I got thinking last week in church when there was baby dedication and the pastor asked parents for the names of their children, why they gave them the names and in some cases, the meaning of the names. It got to some guy's turn, they had twins, most of us were busy wowing and awwwing,then it came time to say their names and he said 'their names are gotten from the word salvation'. Pastor asked again what the names were. He said the first one was Salvo..hubby and I were like what on earth! Then hubby said 'ok, ok, it's the Italian word for salvation'. We were cracking up..see..we were already having fun at the child's expense unknowingly. Then the second one, he said the name is 'Salv' or will it be spelled as 'Salve' now. The whole church gasped and some laughed. I was like what in God's name was this man thinking? Was he not thinking about this children? Well I have a single advise for the little ones, once they get to school age, they should quickly start using their middle names as their first names, that's hoping those make some sense. I might be hoping for too much.

I've heard all sorts of names, someone called his kid Senator, is that even a name? I said well he could have called him Accountant since it's by position now..Aloted told me how twins in her church were named Barrack and Oba,a. Dear Lord, do some parents even think? A friend told me how a couple had not decided the name for their child on the day of the naming ceremony. They kept the pastor waiting over 30 minutes. Dear Lord, they had at least 9 months to do that.

I think a name should be well thought out and even prayed about. You don't want people speaking negatives into your kids lives everytime they are called. You don't want them taunted all the time either. My kids won't be having names that mean nothing or names that will make them the object of being taunted..

I ask you, what's in a name?

And I'm here again...

2009-07-01T09:34:00.003+01:00

Dear Lord,

Yes it's me, your daughter, the one who said she would be here on wednesdays to give thanks...you know Lord even when i don't write publicly here, my heart is grateful to you (or maybe not atimes). I don't even need to say it when you see right through me. You know my deepest thoughts.

First of all Lord, I'm grateful that you've brought the first half of the year to an end and I am alive to start the second half. Then I'm reminded that the year is going so fast and I'm not even sure of the achievements I've had this year. Ok, I shall not whine about that Lord, I'm grateful to be here, nothing missing, nothing broken.

Then I'm thankful that I got to be a year older exactly 2 weeks ago today. I didn't have any plans for it, but the wonderful man you gave me made sure it was a good day. You know Lord how I always love to wear new things on my birthdays, well he made sure I had two even. And for that new laptop that I needed so badly...
Lord thank you for my birthday...and for the wonderful man...the hubby.

I'm grateful Lord because even in my darkest hours and when I have disappointments, you are always there. When I decide I don't want to talk to you, you stay with me, you keep nudging me till I surrender. I'm grateful that you never leave me alone. Because without you, I would be a wreck, I would be shattered. In you I find my completeness.

I'm thankful Lord for the resilient spirit you have given me. When others would have given up and thrown in the towel, most times, I'm able to stand and persevere. It's not easy Lord but I'm able to do it and I'm thankful for that inner strength you have given me. I don't crumble easily and it's by you.

It's amazing how you can make me laugh in the midst of the storm. You constantly give me a reason to smile, and even when it's not a full laughter Lord, when I think I am unhappy, you show me a reason to smile and gradually, it turns into a laugh. You always show me a silver lining...I'm grateful Lord.

I have questioned you Lord of times Lord about why I need to go through some things, why life is easier for some people and I seem to have so many trials but you told me I need to go through the trials, I need to be refined because there is a greater purpose. I might not see it now but I trust You. And I remembere You even said there is something You see in me that makes me qualify for the trials. I will still question Lord because I'm human but I am thankful that You count me worthy for your greater calling and purpose.

Thank you Lord for my friends,they are wonderful people. They are not many but you chose them for me Lord and they are just beautiful people with great hearts. I know I can count on them. And for my neighbour who is a friend, I'm grateful.

My heart is full Lord, there's so much I want to say to you. You are my rock, my friend, my all in all and without you I know I would crumble like a cookie and fall like a house without a foundation.

For everything dear Lord, this daughter of yours is grateful and stands to say if not for you on her side, she would be nowhere. I will be back Lord....I just wanted to register my thanksgiving.

Oh and God I can't sign my letter today because I lost my signatre with the old laptop...will have to get a new signature soon again. And thank you Lord for the person reading this, help them see reasons to be thankful.

Your daghter...
Writefreak

Everything burns..

2009-06-03T18:00:00.004+01:00

I was going to blog about something else, infact I started writing the post but this is something that I'm thinking about right now..so welcome to my mind. I pride myself in being able to multitask, infact sometimes I say that's one of my strengths but recently, I'm beginning to think it might actually be a weakness. I'm that lady who is talking work on the phone, chatting with a few friends while writing a script and at the same time doing chores. And no, i don't have 10 hands. I have only two like everyone else.

Really I think I multitask well, only sometimes, it backfires. I might be cooking and then decide that I need to do some chores or quickly send a work mail and there goes my presence of mind...I refuse to say I'm absent minded. I gat the Holy ghost and He reminds me of all things...Can i hear an Amen?

But really in my world everything burns, every single thing! Hubby even jokes about me and reminds me not to worship him with my burnt offerings...Don't get me wrong, i don't burn food all the time but i have the tendency to forget i've put things on the fire when i start to do other things.

I was talking to a blogger today, and mentioned to her i had not eaten anything as at 3pm..actually i was going to but kept putting it off...yeah i also procrastinate. She chased me to go eat, she was supposed to call me about some stuff we're working on together and she threatened not to call anymore. So i told her i was making noodles and she said 'burnt noodles is not sweet' and i said yeah i know, i'm only boiling an egg now. Well, she stepped out and my neighbour came in and we got talking about our our DSTV was acting up and bla...then i heard something pop in the kitchen...She asked if i had someone in the house...Yeah you got it right, that was when i remembered I was boiling an egg...and yes, my egg popped cos the water had dried up. I came back and told the blogger my egg got burnt and she was like wow...who burns boiled egg...Yes, who burns boiled egg but Writefreak...

So i burnt a boiled egg today and i'm ashamed to say the noodles also got slightly burnt! I just hate staying with food in the kitchen, i feel it's a waste of time when i have other stuff to do. But I'm beginning to think i might have to rethink it...maybe i should start carrying my computer to the kitchen? en? what do you think my blog family?

On another note, why do Nigerians always feel a need to swindle people especially when they know they're JJCs or foreigners? It's annoying me so much right now! Today my neighbour (who is Bulgarian) and I had issues with our DSTV and we called a technician to come and look at it. He did mine first then went upstairs and after he was done with hers, he came to tell me he was charging us 2k each. 2k is not a lot of money, but for what he did, which was to just touch the dish and do a little manipulation,t hat is just swindling! Unfortunately, she had paid him...i told her next time she should call me and let us agree...i eventually gave the guy an extra 1k and slashed 1k out of what he originally asked for...nonsense. lol

A few bloggers and I are writing a series...it's originally Favoured Girl's idea and there are about six of us...y'all should check it out here and give your ladies some support.

Hope your week has been good so far! laters! I'm cooking..need to go check it out! lol

Oh and by the way, it's my birthmonth and I'm starting to accept gifts o, y'all should start donating your gifts. June babies rock!

I Asked for it!!

2009-05-26T19:09:00.006+01:00

Honestly when I saw all the questions like Temite said, I was like gosh I have gone and put myself in hot water. I then thought, come on, you can do this, so here is my attempt at answering all of your questions. Hope you enjoy a glimpse into Writefreak’s world.

Adaeze said which city DO you live

I live in Abuja, FCT, Nigeria

Beulah said WriteFreak, I love your writing style. Have u ever published any book (i mean novel)?

No i haven't published any book yet but i have written my first book and i'm looking for a publisher at present. Thanks for the compliment dearie

chayoma said what got you blogging?

My friend aloted inspired me to start blogging in 2006. I used to work in customer care in telecoms and i think i did my first post i think while i was on a night shift. lol. Yeah so Aoted got me blogging and some boredom..lol..

OPTIMISTIC_alyzzz said I really want to know what type of person u are outside blogsville, are u quiet loud, do u smile often do u make friends fast, are u happy?

I won't call myself quiet, neither will Isay I'm loud. I can be sanguine but I also have a chilled out side to me. Yes I do smile often and I make friends fast. You don't wanna know how many friends I've made on blogville! lol. I would like to say though that the people i call friends are really few. Oh I am very happy! Well I would want to use the word joyful because joy is of the heart and I think happiness is fickle. Happiness comes from a particular thing, joy is a state of mind. I would therefore say I'm joyful, this translates to me being happy...lol..did I confuse you yet?

goodnaijagirl said

You want a question eh?

What do you see as the best parts of your character, and what do you see as your flaws?

Girl, what's your own now? Mscheew..Ok here we go sa

Best parts: i'm friendly, i forgive easily, Some people have described me with the word kind, i am open, infact sometimes i say i'm like a book, you can read me easily, is this even a good part? For instance, the mr can tell i'm upset once i start singing some songs..lol. I'm motherly, i tend to want to take people under my wings and look after them and i think i'm homely. Someone also recently described me as having a good heart. I have tenacity, i know how to stay with something and make it work...Errr..i'm still thinking, when i come up with more, i'll let you know.

Flaws: I tend to please people even at my own detriment (i'm working on that with pple like you on my case(sticking my tonge out at you)), I am quite sensitive and little stuff can get me upset. I can be lazy when i want to be. I could sit down all day doing everything else aside my work, oh yes and i procrastinate, i tend to move from one project to the other without completing the first, i'm working on this. You should see me when i'm doing chores, i'm doing dishes, then i remember something and leave it and go do something else in the bathroom. I might be too trusting, i just believe everyone is speaking the truth, sometimes my husband is amazed at my naivety. Oh and my sense of timing seems sometimes lost, I always push things till the last minute. I've been known to get to interviews at the nick of time...lol..with a lot of stunts inbetween. And lastly, I can be impatient. I really hate waiting....

Then she had a brain wave and said : One more question: If you weren't a writer, what do you think your career would be?

Hmm what would my career be? I honestly don't know. I'm one of those kids who was never really sure what they wanted to be growing up and hoped to find themselves as they went along. I'm glad i did. Oh yes, I think I know, I would probably teach nursery...yes i love kids like that! Someday I am going to have my own preschool and maybe full school alongside being a writer.

Original Mgbeke said

1. What have been the greatest challenges that you faced since becoming a Born Again Christian?

2. When and why did you decide to give your life to God? Have you had any serious slip-ups since then?

3. List 3 things that you consider to be your best character traits, and 3 of your worst?

My greatest challenge i think was being at loggerheads with my dad after i got born again. He's a Catholic and i stopped going to the Catholic church. In retrospect, I'm wiser now and I might not do some of the things I did back them but a lot of times I got sent out of the house several times after getting back home from church. I would do things differently now though.

I think i already answered this question but i would say it was 1996 that i had a total change and since then, no i haven't had any slips! I thank God for that.

I answered the third question already :-)

a.k.a BaGucci said: What one or two or three thing(s) can you say made the difference for you in your walk of faith?

Interesting question. First, the friends i had. I thank God for godly friends. I became a Christian when i was in JS1 in 89/90 for the first time but i promptly forgot about it lol and over the next 6 years i kept giving my life and taking it back. Then in 1996, i met a set of wonderful friends my age, we were leaving secondary school and their waslk of faith challenged me. When people spent their spare time waiting for uni partying or lazing around, we spent most of ours praying and sharing the word. It made a whole lot of difference. I can never forget those friends. Over the years, I've been blessed with godly friends.

The second thing i would say is attending a bible based church.

babajidesalu said

1) How do you deal with Sadness?

2) Do you have a mood you have to be in before you post to your blog?

3) What areas in your life do you think we ought not to be aware of?

4) Would you ever reveal your identity as a blogger?

5) How would you defend Nigeria as a nation in spite of its reputation as a corrupt nation?

6)At what point did you realise people appreciate what and how you write?

7) Has there ever been a 'eureka' moment in your life?

8)Name a good writer in your humble opinion and why?

9)What was your background like at home, if you care to share?

10) Finally, WHAT WILL BE A GOOD TITLE FOR A NOVEL?

Haha! So many questions! But i think i'm up to the task, catch me if you can.

How do i deal with sadness? Well i would say that sometimes i enjoy a pity party, i know i shouldn't but tears are sometimes therapeutic. Then like David, i encourage myself in the lord, i read the word concerning my situation, speak it to myself and then i play some good praise and worship songs...that's it!

Blogging, yes sometimes, i have to be in the mood, if i'm having a rough time personally, then i might not be able to blog around that time.

I don't have skeletons in my cupboard. But there are some things about my personal life that i wouldn't share openly, i think we all have those stuff.

As a blogger on my blog, maybe I won't reveal my identity but i'm aware i'm not totally anonymous. I'm friends with a number of bloggers, some i met while blogging and some before. And even some people who know me personally visit my blog.

Well i would say this, Nigeria might have a lot of corrupt people but other nations have them too. Also the fact that a portion of the populace is corrupt does not make everyone so, there are people like me in Nigeria lol...that;s what i would say. Don't generalise, not every Nigerian is corrupt.

I think i've known since i was a child that my writing is appreciated. My sister and i used to write silly stories as kids.

Yes i have had a number of eureka moments, one that stands out right now was the day i walked hand in hand down the aisle with my prince charming!

I think Abidemi Sanusi is a good writer, i like the way she spins words and her humour

My background? Well, my mum is a teacher and my dad is a retired civi/public servant (he's been both). I am the first of 5 kids. I think that's all i want to share.

Well, a good title for a novel? I'm not sure, still trying to come up with one for mine! lol

downtheaisle said:

Do u have kids???, if yes, u never blog about dem y?, and if No, why (I'm just curious)

No i don't have kids yet and I believe we will have them at the right time, in God's own time.

Tigeress said:

Anyway my questions:

1. do u ever face temptations and how do you deal with it

2. what are the most important things to look out for when looking for a partner

3. How important is God in a relationship

4. Is IVF not having faith in God

5. When Paul spoke about the thorn in his flesh in 2Corinthians 12:7-9. Pls pls pls tell me you know what it means. I think i know what it means but i'm hoping i'm wrong.

I don't know the sort of temptation you mean but yes like every human being i face temptation, e.g temptation to tell a half truth. I usually remember what God's word says and i try to apply it to that situation, sometimes i speak it to myself or roll it over in my mind and that helps me get through it. Sometimes though, i fall but i rise again!

When looking for a partner, i think godliness comes first, does he believe in God? is he a believer? Next, character. Check how he relates to his family, his siblings and people around him. Can you deal with him treating you like that? Purpose. Does he have something he's doing and something he's aiming for? Does he know where he's going or at least have an idea? For me, someone's present isn't as important as their future. There are more but i think those are the most important.

I would answer the third question with Amos 3:3. 'Can two walk together if they don't agree'? If God is no 1 in your life, then he should be in your partner's life. A christian marriage is a relationship between two people under the umbrella of God.

I don't think IVF is not having faith in God. God gave doctors the wisdom they use. You're not going against His will by seeking medical help to have a child so I really don't think it's not having faith. God can use different channels to bless us.

Thorn in the flesh? Hmm Tigeress me i don't know o! lol...i think it might be a cross one has to bear, honestly i will need to find out on this.

aloted said: do you think life is clear cut black and white...or are there any grey areas? Please explain

No I don't think life is just black and white. I believe there are grey areas, even , the greys could be in different shades. Some things in life are not just clear cut. For instance i personally believe abortion is murder but i'm aware there are cases where it might have to be done. There are some cases where it's the mother's or the baby's life. I'm aware one can never say never until you're in a particular situation.

Enkay said: one question - Will you ever post on this blog excerpts of any of your written works?

Yes I will and i have done that before, i have posted two short stories on here before. If you want to read them, i can try to get the links for you.

justdoyin said

question? what do u consider ur strenghts and weaknesses?...

Why do you all want to know these? lol...anyway i answered this question already! lol

Phew...i think i've answered all the questions already! I'm giving myself a standing ovation. lol.

Thank you all for letting me share of myself with you!

Ps: Please swing by soulsistas, did a post there last week.

QMoney: Thanks for the support my sister. You didn't ask any question but you gave me moral support, thanks dearie

It's Wednesday!

2009-05-20T09:31:00.003+01:00

I missed my thankful series last week. I had a lot going on. I had a deadline to meet, a friend staying over, and a lot of other stuff but I'm back. I realise I might not do this every week but I will always come back to do it because I always have reason to be thankful. I will choose to always focus on the things God is doing in my life and the blessings and the positives because it means that's all I need now. If I don't have it yet, I don't NEED it yet... Really, what don't I have that I can't do without?

So Aloted had an idea that we should list 5 things starting with our name that we're thankful for. This isn't premeditated so I am just going to do this as we go along. I'll be thanking God for 5 things that start with W, let's see if I can do this...lol

I am thankful it is Wednesday. This is the day I have set apart to reflect on my blessings and focus on thanking God. It's a day that I am reminded that I have a good life and it can only get better. Wednesdays to me signify Worship.

I am thankful for a Working marriage. I realise a lot of marriages are suffering, couples treating each other to silent treatments, arguments and disagreements all the time and a host of other things but I have a blessed marriage which i don't take for granted. Ours isn't void of disagreement because then it will be a sham but we find a way to resolve our issues without them degenerating.

I am thankful for the Weather. It's bright and sunny. I sometimes complain about the sun being too much in this city but i realise some people are longing for the sun to come out. Oh and the shining of the sun reminds me that no matter how dark a situation is, there is always light at the end of the tunnel. I read a Karen Kingsbury book recently and learnt something fromt the character with Downs Syndrome ; 'when it's raining, you only have to look hard enough at the sky, the sun will be ready to shine'.

I am thankful for Water. I watched a documentary recently where people had to store rain water all year because they just didn't have water. I have the tap running in my house 24 hours of the day. It might look small but it isn't to me, water is essential to life.

I am thankful that I am a Writer. I have found my gift and the ability to express that gift. It is not a small blessing and for this I am thankful. For several years after University, I knew what I didn't want but I needed to know what I really wanted. I am glad to say I am finding myself. It might contradict the average person's definition of success but I am at peace and I know for me the definition of success if finding that thing you love, that God has destined you for and being able to do it.

And to show you I can find something else, a 6th thing...lol, I am thankful for Writefreak who is a work is progress. I am thankful for the total ME.

Ps: I realise this is my 101st post, and I want to give y'all my friends the opportunity to ask me a question or the other which i will tackle in my next post. It will give me motivation to blog the next time. I'll leave it open for a few days or maybe till the weekend and then I will answer the questions. Please note that I would appreciate a sense of decorum and polite questions. If i find a question offensive, then I reserve the right not to answer it.
This is your opportunity if you've wanted to ask me anything about myself...gosh, i hope i don't regret this.

Have a nice rest of the week everyone!

A Writer Writes...

2009-05-16T17:45:00.004+01:00

I haven't been on my blog in almost a week...i haven't been reading blogs, neither have i been commenting. Only aloted made me come out of my sabbatical when she said my attention was required on her blog. I was wondering what trouble i'd gotten into..lol. Turns out i didn't commit a sin afterall.

I've been Mega busy, writing and trying to concentrate so i decided to stay off blogging, and i actually succeeded. I think deadlines help me because when I dont have them, I just typically keep procrastinating. With deadlines though, I would still push till the last minute. Gosh I could win an award for being a 'crash worker'. *sighs*...wish there was an award for that.

I've been doing what i should do as a writer, and it's to write. I should be doing more though and I plan to. I was busy rewriting a script which I just finished. I've come up for some fresh air. I need to start working on something new, cant lose the steam. You know how good it feels to be paid for something you love doing? It feels so good...I won't even talk about that now.

So I have a publisher dilemma and I'm trying to decide what to do. I know some of you guys have published stuff or are in the process of doing so, I need your advice. I submitted to two of the high flying ones but nothing was forthcoming. I sent to a publisher in Ibadan sometime late last year and he only recently said I should send the rest of the book as they can't make up their minds based on the first three Chapters. It's been with them about 8 months now, and he said it might take another 9 months to reach a decision. *sighs*. I'm a bit skeptical about sending the whole manuscript but I know I'm not really experienced in this, so I want to ask, what do you guys think? Should i send it? Are there other publishing houses that will be willing to work with an unknown writer like me? Should I go the self publishing route? I don't want my manuscript to be another one that never sees the publishing daylight. I completed it over a year ago and I don't want to give up. I haven't been motivated to write any other long stuff cos I just want this one published!

Any ideas from you good people in the house? While I wait though, i will continue to write because that is what I love to do. I am a writer, I love to write. A writer writes!

PS: I just noticed this is my 100th post...it's interesting considering I've been blogging since 2006 though i used to be what you;d call a seasonal blogger..lol. So happy 100th post to me!

Would you let them stay?

2009-05-05T16:49:00.003+01:00

I grew up always having relatives and older people in our house, although i am the first child of my parents. Looking back now, i can't remember a time when there was no aunt or uncle or cousin staying with us. Some of those people have helped to shape in who i've become today and some of them have left a bitter taste in my mouth.

First was my Aunt Y whom i loved so much and i still love a lot. She's my mum's half sister and she made the house fun. She was so loving and hardworking. We all simply adored her. At the same time Aunt Y lived with us, we had Aunt B who is my cousin actually on my dad's side. Aunt B had a meanness sent from hell and a special dislike for me. Till this day, I don't know why! Maybe cos she knew i was close to my mum. I don't know. Aunt B grew up to become promiscous and unfortunately,Aunt Y had to stop living with us. She was our shield from Aunt B's wrath and i cried when she left us. I love her so much.

Then Aunt B alone lived with us for a very long time and when my mum was running a course which took her away from home a lot, Aunt B brought home different men and sometimes didn't make food for us. I was only 6, there was little i could do. Aunt B beat me so much i took to running away from home to stay at my mum's friend's a lot of times. Gosh i was so afraid of her! At a time, us kids planned to deal with her and we all said we'd teach her a lesson and beat her...well she came in and only my immediate sis had the guts to pounce on her, rest of us were shaking like leaves. Oh! My poor sis got the beating of her life that day! Sis, i'm still sorry we were all cowards that day! We shoulda fought and taught her a lesson. Maybe the abuse would have reduced if not stopped!

I have a scar on my right arm because of aunt B's disappearing act. My mum was out to school and it was getting rather late. There was no dinner. I was about 6 or 7 and we were all hungry so i decided to fry plantain. Well i did fry the plantain but ended up with a swollen thumb on my right hand for about a month. I had to go dress it at the clinic and all that. I almost hated Aunt B

Fast forward 20 years, Aunt B is a mother of 2 who abused her pastor husband to the point that he left her when his manhood was almost taken from him. Guess what, Aunt B wanted moi, yes moi, to assist her with money and stuff like that. She actually came begging to my house. I am generally not a heartless person and i did give her some money but i made my dad warn her not to come back. My parents did their best to bring her up in the right way and after all they did, i shouldn't have to continue! What goes around comes around. Maybe she remembered her ill treatment of me or not, i really don't know.

While Aunt B lived with us, several other cousins used our house as stopovers or a place to fill in the blanks in their lives either temporarily or not! My mum, God bless her, she's too accommodating. There's an incident that's never left me, i was about eight, i was lying on the bed and my cousin, a guy said we should wrestle. He was short, very short and must have been about 8 years older. It sounded like fun and i was all for it till he was lying on top of me and i just felt what he was doing didn't make sense. I told him i wanted to stop. I got off the bed and left the room not really understanding what happened till several years later. I remember on a particular day he locked me and a guy in the room and i kept screaming and throwing stools before i was let out. His intention, i don't know till today but i'm glad i came out of it untouched. He still visits, he's close to my mum, but somewhere in my head, i can't get over it. I never told my mum though.

I won't ramble on and on, there were too many...too many of them and some of the experiences were horrible. It was an older cousin who made sure we never had whole pieces of meat to ourselves for a long time. She'd divide them, we were too young to eat whole pieces of meat. It was the same cousin who made sure my sis who i'm only a year older stop calling me by my name and added the Sister prefix, i think that 'almost' killed our relationship and i'm not sure we eevr recovered from it. I wish i could rewind and fight her with all my might now!

There were too many incidents but I've come to a decision, while my kids are growing up, i shall have no relative living with me. I don't want a wedge between my kids and i. I don't want them influenced wrongly, i don't want so many things...

This post has made me very emotional...it was inspired by GNG's post. I just went down memory lane. I know it's not that bad and a lot of people when through worse things. But i'm angry i did, i'm angry there were too many people in our house, i'm angry for a long time, we didn't get to be a real family....but i guess there's some therapy in writing.

I won't let them stay, call me a witch or not but i will protect my kids from external influence as much as i can and trust God to do the rest. Would you let them stay?

My Humourous? Letter of Thanks

2009-04-29T09:33:00.005+01:00

Dear God,

I'm not going to ask how you are today because i know you're always fine. You're probably even laughing right now, the bible says you laugh in heaven. How're the angels? I know you always dispatch them to me. Maybe i should still ask though, i hope you're fine up there...if so doxology (lol)

Well I'm fine down here. You keep giving me a lot of blessings, a lot of which I don't even deserve. The purpose of my writing this letter to you is to tell you how grateful I am to you and to let you know the reasons that I'm grateful. Who knows? I might even get more blessings! (yes i'm greedy like that lord)

I'm very hardheaded, i know dear Lord but you take me as I am, you let me throw my tantrum, sometimes permit me to go my own way and then you wait for me to come back to you. Thank you for always giving this stubborn, hard headed child of yours a second chance and never giving up on me.

I was wondering God about my husband and my marriage and I'd like to know why you blessed me so much. I guess I can say it's grace. We have no problems here, and I'm grateful for that. Infact Lord, the hubby has been very wonderful to me (i know it's thanksgiving but can i just make a lil request that you let it continue this way...i know, i know i'm oliver twist! oh and can i also ask that i continue to be a good wife also? and one more thing Lord...ok, i know you know it already!..).

You know Lord, i was wondering about what makes my life so blessed and my friends are a great reason. You've given me very few great ones and i love it that way. I really am not sure i could cope with a lot of them. You know how i like to be all lovey dovey and connected with my friends. Well they're simply amazing and wonderful and i wanted to just say i love them and i'm glad you gave them to me.

Oh we've been enjoyin good health too and i just wanted to say i love how that has been. No one in my family is sick. Mr and i are in good health. All my friends are well and i don't take this for granted. You know how those ulcers were really bothering me, i'm glad that they're mostly gone. They're not as frequent as they used to be and i thank you because soon they won't even come back anymore...i'm sure you know how much of a pain they can be. The little buggers! (Do you even like that word i just used?)

I'm grateful how you keep bringing the right people my way, the ones who can help me, the ones i can help..the ones we can share stuff with each other..My sister, i'm thankful how you made her journey safe and despite her running around everywhere like a headless chicken, you continue to keep her.

I know i've been whining a lot lately and i know you just wonder why i do it. I know i shouldn't. And I just want to say I'm thankful i have people who look up to me and i can be a blessing to materially or otherwise. You have given me much and much is required of me..

You know sometimes Lord, i wonder why i go through some things and why i just won't let me scale the hurdle like a lot of people would so easily but i know you have given me strength and i'm thankful for that strength. I'm a strong woman, and i thank you for it. I'm thankful for those i've been comparing myself to also (and as an aside, i'm sorry), for all that you're doing in their lives.

You know i could write on and on and there'll be so much to say but i need to go and do that script i've been procrastinating (did i even spell that word right?) . But you know how grateful i am right? I really am grateful

Oh i should let you know about that chic in the hospital who took my blood yesterday. I'm thankful she didn't break the needle in my arm. Sometimes she seems to like her job, at other times she's so insensitive but that doctor that made me smile...thank you for him, you know how to bring me a smile even when i'm scared. So thank you Lord that she didn't break the needle in my arm again!

Let me drop my golden pen here so that i can go and do some work. But before i do that i will like to say you're the butter in my bread and the sugar in my tea. Infact you're the real ISH!

Yours Sincerely,

Becoming my mother....

2009-04-19T16:13:00.002+01:00

When i was a kid, my mum would not let us especially me being the first child sleep till the living room and kitchen were sparkling clean. Behind her, we all called her a freak. Like really, couldn't it have waited till morning. No way, you couldn't reason with my mum on that.

If she woke up at 2am and the house was untidy, trust me, she was heading to my bed. Initially i used to argue and beg her to let it wait but i found out that never worked. I would spend several minutes begging her, then spend the rest tidying up, so i decided to do it in good grace always telling myself that one day i would have my own home and be able to make my own rules.

Trust me, i love my mum so much, she just had her idiosyncracies. A lot of our times spent together, which was most times with my siblings, we'd all tease her and tell her she needed to relax or else her grey hairs would increase. lol..well that never stopped mama writefreak.

If you were sleeping at 6a.m, my mum thought that was a huge offence, even on Saturdays. It took my dad's intervention for her to allow us sleep in a bit on Saturdays. And even at that, she'd walk all over the house, making comments about how we all were refusing to get up early in the morning and asking what we were still doing in bed. Considering i am a light sleeper, i used to just get up in annoyance and say 'ok mummy what do you want me to do'? My siblings would just hold the covers over their heads tighter.

Can you imagine that even after i got married, my mum still did this and my husband and i just teased her and said she should relax cos we weren't getting out of bed yet. Lol...she got the message and we all had a good laugh about it. It doesn't mean though that if i go tomorro to visit Mama and Papa Writefreak, she still wouldn't try her luck...lol. My mum is just an amazing woman, so strong and clean.

Fast forward 10 years after this, Writefreak has been married a while, has her own home that she dreamed of and can do anything she likes. Yeah anything she likes! First thing Writefreak will notice when she had a few siblings staying with her was anything that wasn't in place. Calssic Mama Writefreak attitude, infact, my mother would start asking why some things were not in place as she settled down once she entered the house. My siblings pointed out i was exactly like our mum and i said rubbish, you're just lazy...

Recently, i found myself tidying the sitting room at 3 am and i didn't think it was wrong, i only wanted to do it so things would be easier for me when i woke up the following day. Wait, isn't that reasonable? What if that's what my mother would have done.

A few days ago, night owl that i am, i was chatting with a few friends and working at about 2:30 am when i got very hungry. I decided to get a slice of bread from the fridge (yeah, yeah, i know better, it's not healthy to eat at such od dhours and bla bla..), i got to the fridge and i promptly ignored the bread. Yours truly noticed some dirt spots inside the fridge and just swung into action. I cleaned two layers and then it occured to me it was the early hours of the morning already. I got my bread deliberately and came to the living room but i just couldn't take my mind off it. I really wanted to clean the fridge at that time. I forced myself not to, it could wait till morning. It took a lot of will though. My mother would have done the same, maybe even done the cleaning at that time.

Help! Am i becoming my mother?

Enter His Gates....

2009-04-15T10:28:00.005+01:00

Giving thanks keeps things in perspective. It makes you focus on what is going right and shift your attention(even if temporarily) from the negatives. It makes you acknowledge that things are not so bad.
When you graduate from thanksgiving to worship, it gives you a sense of reckless abandonment. You move your focus entirely from the natural to the supernatural and it's almost a case of 'i don't send, God's got it all now'.
Singing praises, giving thanks open doors to great things. Closed doors are open...

'But at midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the prisoners were listening to them. Suddenly there was a great earthquake, so that the foundations of the prison were shaken; and immediately all the doors were opened and everyone’s chains were loosed.'. Acts 16:25-26

This is my 10th thankful post and i am not giving up...I am thankful for the following:

1. I am thankful for the death and ressurection of Jesus. So many lessons to learn from it!

2. I am thankful for the Easter holidays, it's one of the best Mr and i have had in a long time....talk of just lounging. No details all you aprokos...lol!

3. I am thankful for my marriage, for a man that loves me and whom i love in return, for the ability to continue seeing the best in each other. I don't take this for granted

4. I'm thankful for a safe trip. Mr and I went to Lagos and came back safely

5. I'm thankful for my family. I saw all my siblings except one last week and I'm glad they're all doing ok.

6. I'm thankful for my nephew and niece who seem to be growing in leaps and bounds.

7. I'm thankful for my health. Sometimes my digestive system just seems to be on a break, it was yesterday but today I feel a lot better.

8. I'm thankful for good and godly friends and the ability to be able to stick together in good or bad times.

What are you thankful for?

ps: i'm seriously beginning to think i should be able to get paid for blogging. i'd rather blog than do my work...help people! but erm, i'm beginning to think if i got paid for it, won't i also start seeing it as a job, not so? i love blogging jo! lol

*Pls swing by soulsistas to read our latest post*

What's with the tagging sef?

2009-04-11T09:31:00.005+01:00

So i got tagged by Temite and i thought i'd just ignore her and not do it but then...i can't say no to her...so here i am doing a tag on a Saturday morning...mschew.

Here are the rules

*Use the first letter of your name to answer each of the following questions.
*They have to be real...nothing made up! If the person before you had the same first initial, you must use different answers.
*You cannot use any word twice and you can't use your name for the boy/girl name question.
* Dont google ur answers.
*Make it as interesting and fun as you can.

1. What is your name: writefreak
2. A four Letter Word: Warm
3. A boy's Name: Wonuola
4. A girl's Name: Wunmi
5. An occupation: Writer; writers rule men!
6. A color: White
7. Something you'll wear: White PJs
9. A food: Wice (i can't think of any food that starts with W now jo and some people actually get away with pronouncing it like that)
10. Something found in the bathroom: Water
11. A place: Warri (maybe i should take a trip !mistook 12 noon for 12 midnight! lol
13. Something you'd shout: WHY ME! lol
14. A movie title: Wanted
15. Something you drink: Water
16. A musical group: West Life
17. An animal: Wild animal...hehehehe...which animal name starts with W sef? mscheew
18. A street name: erm...what if i create my own street name? Wale street...lol
19. A type of car: Wine Range Rover!
20. The title of a song: Worship Again

Got some very bad news yesterday. Our friends; a couple had a baby yesterday, a little girl and they lost her, i'm just trying to understand it but i've found out i can't. Please help me say a prayer for my friends..i can't imagine the grief they're going through right now. I won't question...whatever the case is, i know God loves them and He loves us all. It is well. *sighs*

Ps: It's my lovely friend Aloted's birthday today. She's such a wonderful person, y'all give her a shout. Babe you know there's nothing but love for you here and may this be the best year you ever lived!
Oh it's Enkay's birthday too...happy birthday babe. May it be your best year ever!

Have a great Easter everyone!

Only By Grace...

2009-04-08T11:52:00.002+01:00

It is by His grace that we're not consumed. It is by His grace that we shut our eyes to sleep for the night and wake up and it's morning. You lift your hands, they're working perfectly...the eyes see, your legs work, your brain hasn't shut down. Your family is intact, you can think clearly...it is only by His grace. C'mon someone must be behind all that...it is God and He deserves some praise.

Atimes we don't think clearly, our problems seem to be so huge that we forget the goodness of God and His faithfulness to us. What i hear clearly in my spirit this morning is that even if you're going through stuff, things that you don't understand, you're going through them only because you can bear them, you're strong enough and at the end of it, you will come out tried and tested, purified! Can i get an Amen? I am speaking to myself and I'm speaking to you...whatever you're going through right now is not permanent..it will COME TO PASS....

Just look very well, think deeply, there is at least something you can be thankful for even in the eye of the storm!

So here goes my own list:

1. I am thankful for grace. Grace is what makes it possible for me to keep having several chances with God.

2. I am thankful for my life companion, the man God has given me, what we have is special and i'm just glad I have him to walk life's road with.

3. I am thankful for great friends, those who will listen to you rant and not think you have a nut unscrewed in your head....those friends like sisters who are ever there to catch you when you seem to be falling. It's a blessing and I don't take it for granted.

4. I am thankful for my health. Every part of my body works, it is only by His grace.

5. I am thankful for that phone call...the one that got me searching my soul and got me saying some things over and over to myself. Thanks for that sis, it was a blessing and i know i'm blessed!

6. I am thankful that I finally got to take that step...it just might be a window to great things...

7. I'm thankful that hubby got to stay home with me instead of being away for two days. I hate the home alone days and when i got that text saying 'have you been praying about my journey?' I knew he was staying home...yay! lol

8. I'm thankful for Midnight crew and their inspiration to sing IGWE....i'm just so hooked on that song at the moment...yeah yeah, i know, i'm beginning to sound like a broken record. I'm still thankful for them anyways!

9. I'm thankful for blogville....it's just a blessed community.

That's my list, are you making yours?

Happy midweek!

Ungrateful like GNG + IGWE

2009-04-06T11:05:00.009+01:00

I'm loving this song...i am so loving it...it's been on repeat in my house since yesterday...i'm playing it now and i don't know how many more times i'm going to play it today. It's not that new i know, infact i've heard it several times before but all of a sudden, i just lurrrrrve it. I love the beat and it just lifts my spirit!

No king like God now...abi? So i'm loving Midnight Crew's Igwe and i was playing the CD and dancing in ma living room yesterday when ma (former friend Good Naija Gir l came online. I couldn't contain my excitement so i asked if she'd heard the song before and she said she'd look for it in YouTube. She found it right...and got hooked, she was loving it! So i asked if she'd thank me for helping her find some good music for her soul on a good Sunday afternoon...guess what, she refused to pay for this awesome service i did her, neither was she grateful. Instead, she told me she'd give me the honour of remaining my friend. What! Isn't that just the most conceited thing i ever heard? So i said i will report her to the gbogbo blogville o! What do you guys think? Should i remain friends with her or not? She said you guys will take her side, is that true? I'm about to make her a former friend, shouldn't i? GNG, you ain't got nothing on me!

And then i got my lovely sis Temite to listen to it, she loved it so much and i could hear her gratitude over the phone when i spoke to her. GNG, you need to learn some tips from my aburo. She sure knows what gratitude is! That's how she got hooked o and was playing the thing over and over too...and i thought...see what you done Writefreak! You've inspired another Igwe addict. Nurrin do you jare aburo mi. I love you like that.

It doesn't matter i had to tell them both what Igwe means although i'm not Ibo and i don't understand most of the words in the song...hehehe...See...GNG, another service i rendered, translation...one more reason to be grateful and to get paid! lol. So i said i would get Temite to side with me ( i know she knows people who know people who know people...that can...GNG, you berra watch ya back!) . I think she's got a mafia boyfie sef. GNG, are you shaking yet? Temite, over to you, time to fight for your big sis!

And btw GNG, i have tabled your matter to aloted. You know we're like 5 and 6 and she's got powerful people in blogville. You should be shaking already. Gosh, i'd be scared in your shoes!

So y'all enjoy these videos from Midnight Crew (after all the messing around). Take your pick, they have two vides for the same song. IGWE. I can almost hear that word in my sleep. lol

Have a nice week my good people!

Thank you dear father

2009-04-02T12:57:00.001+01:00

I missed my thankful post yesterday, it doesnt mean i'm not grateful, it just means i was tied up...but God sees my heart and he knows that i love Him so much...He's afterall the giver of life, He's the one whogives me hope, makes me wake up each day and know i want to continue living....because with Him, life is just starting!

He's afterall the one who can turn around seemingly hopeless situations and infuse life into them...i've seen Him do this, so i choose to not believe otherwise. I'm going through a phase, sometimes it's tough and i feel like i can't go on, but then my eyes are open to the things that are working and i know for a certainty that I am indeed blessed! I shouldn't even think otherwise...

Ah, this was supposed to be a thankful post and that is what it shall be, not a random one! Gosh, i feel so random! Lolo

So i am thankful for the following reasons:

1. I am thankful for hope and faith. Two days ago, i felt like i was in a hopeless situation. I questioned God, i despaired, i grieved...but He infused hope into me again, His word is my anchor and I will not let go! He is the giver of hope! And someday I will smile over that situation (pls say Amen)

2. I am thankful for a husband who loves me deeply and thinks about me. The little things He does makes me thank God and i am not taking them for granted. He considers me and will still buy me ice cream and sharwama (without me asking) on a day that I'm feeling blue and have forgotten to eat...gosh, i love my husband and God i thank you for Him.

3. For the wonderful friends He has surrounded me with. It's sad to walk life's journey alone and i'm blessed i don't have to do that. They might be very few, infact a trickle, but they're lovely.

4. I 'm thankful for that ray of light that is shining through, it might be very faint now, but i see it there...and i know for a fact that it will get brighter.

5. I'm thankful for the script He just gave me the grace to complete. For the friends that i peppered with questions...and for the fact that I know it's going out in favour!

6. I'm thankful for provision. He continues to meet our needs...these are difficult times but He keeps giving us a song...and i can confidently say 'when men say there's a casting down, we say there's a lifting up'

7. I'm thankful that although i dont have a grand plan written out for my life, i consistently know what to do and where I'm going...

8. I'm thankful for life and love...for the laughter i share with my husband and the people close to me.

I'm thankful! What are you thankful for?

He makes all things beautiful in HIS time....Amen!

My name is Writefreak and...

2009-03-30T12:15:00.000+01:00

This is probably the randomest post you read from me..brace yourself! Lol

I don't know why I fight wearing my glasses so much! Actually I can see clearly without them..but I get these huge headaches when I neglect them like a reminder to pick them up. Hubby bought me this posh Ferre Gamo frames but o ti o, yours truly will hide them in the bag. Well staring at my system all day hasn't helped so much so I have decided to be friends with my posh glasses...don't advice me to wear contacts! I think it's torture!

Or is it cos I've been looking like a nerd that I avoid wearing them glasses? With my braids packed up and the glasses, I think I'm a perfect fit for a nerd or is it a strict teacher? Not sure...wish I could post pictures...lol

I'm very clumsy! Yes! I hit things, I get burns and scratch myself so many times. I just can't help it. I try so hard. I'm not as bad but Susan in Desperate Housewives remind me of myself! I try but maybe I really don't care. *shrugs*

The past one week has seen me sleeping at some very odd hours- 5a.m, 6a.m. I write late into the night and do some chatting. The guilty parties know themselves! Keeping me awake all night but really it's more of working! I have now decided to be a normal human being so I shall not be staying up longer than 2a.m anymore so help me God!

There are honest Nigerians and I believe in this great country of ours. I left my second phone on the car yesterday mistakenly. Mr and I went to cut his hair and we were there for like ages...actually we were the last to leave the shopping centre. The gateman came to us as we drove out and wanted to know if we lost a phone. I was so sure, I said No. The guy wouldn't let up so Mr asked him for the fone and dialed it, voila, it was mine! It's a cheap phone but replacing would have been an agony! We gave him a tip and Mr said to him 'with people like you, there's hope for Nigeria'...yes there is! Thanks Titus for being a honest Nigerian.

I hate not getting what I want when I want it! It sucks when I don't but delay isn't denial. I'm learning that God knows what I need per time and I should just trust Him. I hear him saying daughter, just trust fully, one day at a time. I make all things beautiful I'm MY time. Teach me to trust daddy...my life is in your hands.

I'm thinking of moving to MTN blackberry. Zain has been ripping me off! Why pay more when I can pay a flat rate? Ehn?

I love sleeping in. Why can't everyday be like Sunday? Dear God forgive me, I didn't go to church yesterday. But I woke up after noon and I felt blessed. The whole house was tidy..Mr had done all the chores. Dear God, I want more Sundays!

I shop for food once a month but I absolutely don't like it. I need a paradigm shift. I wonder what can make me like it now..it's that time of the month when my fridge is getting empty and I'm thinking oh God not again! Lol

Is it wrong for me not to have all them grand 5 to 10 year plans? I do have things written down and I know where I'm going. I just like to live one day at a time resting it all in my Father's hands!

I have less owambes to attend and I'm not feeling guilty about it. Now when I'm invited, I have the luxury of sayin...'Eh ya and I'm not in lagos o'...that is such a tenable excuse! And I'm loving it!

I miss my Mom! Am I too old for that? I wasn't home throughout last year, mostly cos she and my dad visited us a few times but I still miss her. I think I might spend some time with them over Easter!

I've been wishing I could be a child again! Honestly this growing up business isn't just for me. What happened to the days of not thinking about anything and having all my needs met by someone...having my bath in the rain though I knew it would make me sick. That's it! I am declaring that I Writefreak refuse to become an adult, I am still a child...maybe my dream will come true if I say it long enough...but wait o, there is a time for everything. God! You just know how to put me right!

My brother got posted to the outskirts of a city in Imo. He's going to be a secondary school teacher. There's no light, as in NEPA hasn't been giving them at all (not like we're better off here) and his salary from the school is 2k...I'm rotfl as I say it...isn't that just a joke. Isn't it time the govt did something about corpers' allowance? 7k5 or 9k..absolutely ridiculous!

Abuja drivers are driving me nuts! They just plain can't drive or is it that the roads are too wide and too good to be true?

I love my two year old nephew who wants to talk to me on the phone all the time! He doesn't know how to say l, he says n..so he says to me all the time - 'I nove you aunty...he says the l in my name with an n'. He's adorable! And everytime I speak to him now, no matter the time of the day, he says 'I haven't eaten all day aunty'. I hear his mum screaming 'it's a lie'. Children are such a delight!

God gave me a new sister and she rocks! We happened on each other and she's just so cute! I've learnt a lot from her and I dare to call her 'my blessing'. Temite my lovely sister with a pink heart who can't spell... I love ya! You're my blessing and I won't stop believing in you.

I forgot to add that I did this whole entry on my phone! Am I an addict or what? That's a whole entry on its own!

The first time..

2009-03-22T15:38:00.003+01:00

The first time for a lot of people is always the best, for some it's memorable, for some it's very embarassing....

X was a sophomore student in the University and had just made a decision to change her place of worship and found somewhere more comfortable on the campus, a fellowship that made her feel at home.

Part of the requirements for new members was to attend a basic class called Foundation school. Students were divided into small groups with volunteer teachers who were also all students who had been in the fellowship for a while.

Her friend Y, was a teacher at the Foundation shcool and she wanted so badly to be in her friend's group. The list came out and she was disappointed to find out she had been put in the class of someone that she didn't even know. She went to ask her Y why she wasn't in her class, why gave an unintelligible answer. X expressed her disappointment for being put in A's class.
She turned her nose up, disappointment and cynicism written all over her face and she turned to Y and asked 'please tell me who is that A sef?'. Y smiled and X was irritated. X persisted in her quest to know. Please tell me, i hope he's a nice person and not someone that'll put me off this Foundation school o.

The answer came soon enough, 'he's right there behind you'.
X felt like the ground should open up and swallow her. Embarassment written all over her face, she turned and said 'A, nice to meet you. I didn't mean what i said the way it sounded'. A flashed a smile and said 'it's ok don't worry, see you in class'. He sauntered off leaving X all purple faced.
Interestingly, their relationship blossomed after that, they became best of friends and six and half years later, they got married.

Yeah, that's how Writefreak met her hubby the first time...lol, you wanna share how you met your husband, wife, fiancee/fiance or boyfriend? Would love to hear...

Hope you all had a good weekend. Wish you a pleasant week ahead!

Baba, you're too much!

2009-03-18T14:00:00.008+01:00

Our God is worthy to be praised!

A scripture says 'though he slays me, i will praise Him'. What manner of faith! I wonder if i can have such faith, He will not slay me, i know but even if i go through the storm, i know He's there with me. He's an awesome God and i hope somedayi will be able to have as much faith as to be able to say 'though he slays me....'

I thought of Job and all He had to go through and His faith was still strong inspite of all the trials and tribulations. And i asked the Lord to increase my faith. He will not allow us to be tested more than we can bear but when i am going through that which He knows i can bear, may i not give in to fear and doubt, may i be able to stand strong in my faith knowing He will not allow me to go through what i cannot bear.

God is awesome and i praise Him for these reasons:

1. For my wonderful husband, he just sent me a text message that made me smile and think oh God, you gave me the best man! I'm thankful for a man who is not afraid to acknowledge his shortcomings and is willing to walk hand in hand. And oh, should i say i'm thankful that i have him to walk this journey of life with?

2. I'm thankful for my friends. A good number of them are pregnant, i pray for them everyday and God is keeping them and working in their lives.

3. I thank God for friends who help me when i need it, whether virtual or real life. Thanks FG and No Limit for your contributions to the work i'm doing now

4. I'm thankful to God for constructive criticism because through it, i get better

5. I'm thankful to God for a second, third, fourth, fifth and uncountable chances He continues to give me. Even when i choose to be faithless, i am able to go back to Him and He restores my soul.

6. I'm thankful to God for helping me be a blessing to people around me. He gives me a word in season and i am able to encourage!

7. I'm thankful to God for provision. He's an awesome God. I never lack and good thing

8. I'm thankful to God for this work in progress (me) that He keeps guiding and leading by the hand

9. I'm thankful for Standtall and what she's doing. Yours truly is this week's celebrity, Standtall has the privilege of interviewing me (hehehe, how conceited), you ran read it here.

10. I thank God for my Ayefele cd which is now my dance exercise cd..lol

11. Lastly, i thank God for you all!

Baba you're too much! May you continue to bless all my friends in blogville and their families!

All in a Week...

2009-03-15T13:45:00.006+01:00

What do i blog about today?
Should i write another Memoir from my childhood?
Should i make it random?
Should it be about things that happened recently? Ok let's try...i'll keep typing, you'll get a post, whichever thoughts my hyper active mind decide are dominant at the moment...then we will give it a title...deal! You don't have an option not to deal. lol

BobTV film festival took place here in Abuja this last week and i attended at the Sheraton hotel. I was particularly interested in a class on Story writing. I got there first day and i didn't know it was such an organised event. There were ushers in red checking out tags and asking people to come register. My friend; a screen writer who omitted details had omitted the fact that i would have to register with five grand. I didn't have that much cash, i try not to carry cash on me cos i just end up spending what i don't need. Thankfully i had my ATM card, i got to the machines and in the whole of Sheraton, not one machince carried cash. That pissed me off.

My friend was blogging the event so i waited for him outside, i got a number of hellos from random guys who were also attending the festival and i tried to wear my nice cap. Several minutes later i was still waiting and one of the guys who had said hello earlier walked up to me.

Random guy: Hi, you're still outside?

*alarm bells go off in my head* i'm thinking obviously...would you see me outside if i wasn't outside? I humour him and instead i say

Me: 'yes'

Random guy: You must be a student. What school are you from?

For crying out loud, i tried my best to look a bit responsible. Not my usual top and jeans, i was wearing a nice indian top with jeans. How exactly do i look like a student? Once again i humour him

Me: No, i'm a writer

Random guy: What newspaper do you write for?

Oh my God! This guy is so mumu! Does every writer write for a newspaper? Dude still lives in the dark ages

Me: No i am a freelance writer. I write for screen, i write fiction....(i'm tired, i don't owe him an explanation)

Random guy: *takes a look at me from head to toe* But you're also a student?

Now i'm really annoyed, did i not just tell this dude that i'm not a student? I suppose to him i looked to young or small to be anything else? I wonder if he was trying to hit on me or not but for crying out loud, i wear two rings on my wedding finger...maybe most guys think they're a joke! Who knows?

Me: Do you know how many years ago i graduated?

I walk off and hear him say after me, has it really been that long then? Dude, yes it's been a while, almost 7 and it would have been more, no thanks to the strikes when i was in Uni.

Cabbage diet
I decided to do the cabbage diet for a week as African weight loss diva recommended. It's supposed to help lose 4kg in a week. I desire to weigh less than 65kg, i now weigh between 67 and 68kg and i thought, why not take a short cut? Cabbage gave me so much gas, i gave up the diet after three days and concluded...a lifestyle change is better than a quick fix programme. Lesson learnt the hard way, i still have some of the gas and i'm hardly able to eat. Hubby laughed at me so hard and he said...'i know we don't say i told you so, but if there was a worst line right now, i should use it...' I eyed him, i should have thrown a pillow at him..lol

I have a confession to make, i haven't gone jogging in a month! A whole month...i'm now thinking of exercising in a structured manner, like maybe register in a gym here, used to go to one in Lagos. Or maybe swim on particular days during the week and have a set number of laps...still thinking about it...your thoughts are welcome

I'm writing a screenplay, still putting the story together and now my characters are creeping into my sleep, help!

I took an afternoon nap, and dreamt that Simeone did a post, wanting to know about something personal, i'm not telling exactly what but i'm wondering ok, why is Simeone creeping into my dream? Whatever thoughts you're entertaining about me dude, time to spill..lol..Blogville, you sometimes gives me the creeps!

Ok, peace out! off to watch rubbish tv with Mr and enjoy some laughter together.

Thankful Wednesday + Comparison Trap

2009-03-11T10:21:00.001+01:00

'For we dare not class ourselves or compare ourselves with those who commend themselves. But they, measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise'.
2 Cor 10: 11-12

Ok so what is Writefreak saying today? God is teaching me some lessons and i'd like to leave a bit of them with you my family on blogville. Comparing yourself with anyone, anyone at all, is a sign of foolishness! Have you ever heard yourself say things like these:

1. Why me?
2. All my mates are getting married, why not me?
3. All my friends have kids but me
4. Why is my life so different?

There are so many ways we compare ourselves with others and instead of focusing on what is important, we're caught in trying to be like Mr A or Mrs B. How dare you? When God has made only one YOU; each of us with unique gifts and abilities, some have disovered theirs, others are working out theirs while some are being too lazy to work it out. Whatever point we are in our lives, the focus should be on what God wants for us per time and not what the other person is about. And if we're being lazy, then we need to step up our game!

It's not easy not to compare because you always have people around you who will help you do it anyway. Even when you don't want to, folks compare you to others and poison your minds.

Real life scenario. A phone call comes in from a friend you haven't heard from in a long time. It goes, how're you doing? It's been a long time, the last time i heard from you was over a year ago at your wedding. You're happy to hear from the long time friend and you tell her, oh yes, it's been way too long! Then she asks you if everything is alright. In your innocence, you go oh sure all is perfect! Then she teasingly asks if you have a baby on the way and you say hmmm,not yet. Then she goes, oh i hope all is well....my friend who got married with you on the same day just had a baby. My response; don't you ever compare me with anyone, God has a plan for each of our lives and whatever His plan is for my life i'm sure is not the same with that of your friend's. So my dear, when are you getting married? You guessed right, the call ended. Even if you don't want to compare, people help you to.

Asking Why me is a major pointer to the fact that you're comparing yourself to others. The experiences we go through in life are meant to shape us into who we eventually become and since you didn't make yourself, you need to let Him work out His will in your life...When gold has been tried, it becomes pure.

I'm learning that no one has it perfect and the person you're comparing yourself to has also got an area where their shoes pinch. You're not wearing their shoes so you don't know where it hurts and a lot of people wear theirs gracefully!

There's a unique YOU that no one else can be like. It's questioning God's word and authority when you ask Him why can't i be like so so person....being in the comparison trap is the worst place one can get stuck in. I'm not exonerating myself cos i've been guilty so many times, asking God questions and mentioning names sometimes. It's ok to ask God questions but don't get stuck there...move on!

What does His word say regarding me? What does His word say regarding any situation i'm in? Focus on that and not what is not working in your life but working in your friend or colleague's life. When you're going through something, it's for something glorious to come in the end...('For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory') " Cor 4:17.

Also you need to block out every factor, including humans that want to make you stay in the dumps and judge the situation of your life by that of others. Stay focused on God and what you know He has in store for you. When you fall into the comparison trap, ask Him to forgive you and help you see the greater good He has for your life. It doesn't seem like it sometimes but trust me, He's got a greater good He's cooking up most times when everything looks turpsy turvy!

On the whole, know that God never wants to punish you, the devil will bring afflictions your way that is certain but God always has a way out, an escape route...you might not see it immediately because God doesn't work like a microwave, it might take time but your beauty will shine forth. Isaac got married to Rebekkah at 40 years, he asked God for children, Esau and Jacob came when he was 60 years. Yeah that seems like a very long time, i must commend his faith cos i think in his shows, i'd be tempted to throw in the towel and sit somewhere moping and asking God WHY ME? It might take time, your life might not look as glamorous as that of folks around you now but with your trust in Him and letting Him work in you daily, you will get there.

Be wise, do not compare yourself to others!

So it's a Wednesday and i'm definitely thankful to God for His numerous blessings. These are some of my own reasons:
1. I am thankful to God for the lessons He continuously teaches me. Right now, i am thankful that my life is not defined by anybody's opinion but by His word
2. I am thankful for the public holiday on Monday, hubby and i got to spend time together at home and it was bliss
3. I am thankful that once again, i am strong and my mind is being renewed, i'm out of the dumps, halleluyah!
4. I am thankful that God gave me the wisdom to download the display driver for my laptop using Mozilla cos IE kept terminating. Now y computer looks good! Yay!
5. I am thankful to God for family and what it means. My parents seem to bug me with their calls all the time and though i lament at how many questions they ask, i am very thankful that they care.
6. I am thankful that God helped me out with the manic cab driver i used yesterday night and He gave me patience to handle the situation. I tell you that wasn't me, typical WF would freak out! (to hear the story, you have to pay me!)
7. I am thankful that i know the one who holds tomorrow so the future is certain.
8. I am once again thankful for provision for Mr and I. We never lack and all our needs are met. Infact i don't think i have real 'needs', just wants..and God still meets them. Halleluyah
9. I am thankful for God's protection over our lives. We go out and come in with no incidents. Praise the Lord!

There must be something you're thankful for, wanna shar e?

Ps: check out the soulsistas blog if you haven't done so.

The Teacher Got a Lesson

2009-03-07T12:04:00.007+01:00

How many of you had Ghanaian ( i don't even think i know how to spell that...chei) lesson teachers as kids? I did, we had far too many and i thought my parents were just being wicked. While other kids played outside, we were on the balcony with our teachers learning and relearning and yearning to go play outside with out mates. Once the lesson was over, we made up for it by over playing. Mind you, it's not like my parents forbade us to play, they just made sure we studied first.

My parents were really into education and now i'm really grateful for that, when i was a kid, it definitely felt like punishment. My mum is a teacher and my dad used to work in the Ministry of Education, dad is one of the few civil servants who did the jobs to the letter. Anyway, so you can imagine the burden of being saddled with two educationists as parents. Arrrggghhh...lol. I remember once i was very ill and it was close to exam periods, i was in JS1 i think, my mum sat beside me going through my school notebooks with me and reading them to me and making sure i understood what she read. Please, i was ill, could i not be exempted from reading...lol

When i was about 6 or 7 years i think, we had this teacher who was really really mean. Or was he? I don't remember but we didn't like him. The guy just wasn't plain nice and to our kid minds, he just plain hated us. So we decided he deserved to be punished. There was me, my sister, my youngest sister who was too young to be part of the classes, we seriously envied her and then there were our two friends, they're sisters and we were neighbours; L and B. So we kids got together and plotted a coup for our lesson teacher. We didn't consider the consequence i think. We were too young to consider the consequences of our actions.

It was a typical evening ,we were being taught but we weren't concentrating. We were waiting for it to happen. We kept staring at each other and waiting for our moments of glory, would it ever come? Then just as we were going to give up, it happened. Our wicked teacher fell inside the chair he was sitting on and it was a very bad fall. He screamed! We laughed! Silly children, he turned his wrath on us, he didn't beat us but he resigned his position. My mum wasn't sure why he had to resign because he fell. If only she knew.

The day before, we had gotten together, us kids, wondering how we could deal with our teacher and then it came to us. I can't remember who has the credit for such a brilliant idea but between us kids, we decided on the punishment. We initially thought of putting pins in his seat but we knew that would be too easy. He'd know they were planted. Then we remembered our almost abandoned dining chair which always fell in. Remember what dining chairs used to look like in the 80s? Well the cushion of this particular chair had been attached from the wood that held it but it could be placed properly and you'd hardly know. For us kids, it was easy to not fall into it but and adult weight would definitely not hold for too long. We decided to give him this chair and humiliate him.

He comfortably sat in the chair wagging his finger at us if he asked a question and we didn't know the answer. Then our moment of glory came, he fell! We had punished him. We laughed, we couldn't contain our joy and i'm sure he could tell from our faces that we planned it. I'm sure guilt and pure joy were written all over our little faces.

The teacher resigned and we were free to do as we pleased, only for a short while though. I'm not saying we were right but i guess this was part of what being a child was about.Our joy was short lived though, my mum found us a new Ghanaian lesson teacher!

Thankful Again

2009-03-05T00:43:00.001+01:00

Thank you all for your comments on my last post. I'm feeling so much love from blogville, it's amazing! It's interesting that although I don't know 99 percent of those on blogville physically, I feel like we share a connection. it's as if I know you all, although I don't if that makes sense. I'm glad to be part of the movement called blogville!
Once again I'm giving God the glory cos He alone deserves it. These are some of the reasons:
1. I'm thankful that hubby and I are alive and we have seen the 3rd month of the year(is it me or is time running by)!Only the living can praise God!
2. I'm thankful that once again God has opened my eyes to see that behind every cloud is a silver lining. It might not look like it all the time but there definitely is one! Thank you Lord for showing me that no situation is ever as bad as it seems...
3. I'm thankful for aloted's dad. God saved Him from armed robbers and I trust God for His perfect healing
4. I am thankful for the material blessing I received from a friend. It's proof to me once again that God is interested in the minutest detail of my life and will position people to help me.
5. I am thankful for a husband who constantly makes sure that I don't lack. Thank you father for provision. May our cruise of oil never fail (and yours too as you read this post)
6.I am thankful that my laptop has been fixed and is now in good working condition. Now u don't have to keep trying to get the charger to make a connection with the port
7. I am thankful that Arewa is back on blogville after 8 months absence and she is even married now!
8. And lastly I am thankful for all my friends on blogville who make it a worthwhile place. I love you all!
There's a lot more I could write...but there's so much typing one can do on a phone. I just had to put this up. God bless you all and I pray you will always see that no situation is ever as bad as it seems!

Ps: I forgot to ask....what are you thankful for?

On Myself and other things- Totally Random!

2009-02-27T14:08:00.007+01:00

I've wanted to write a post for a few days, wanted to put pen to paper but the zeal was just not there...or maybe the zeal was there but i didn't have the strength, whatever! I see posts flashing from my favourite blogs and i just ignore them, strange but i just didn't feel like it. Was a bit tired physically and then i was kinda feeling antisocial.

I had a guest (who manages to turn up at my house everyday) and i honestly almost walked her out. I wanted to be alone and i guess she just didn't get the message...hmmph...i had so many reasons to be thankful but i couldn't even bring myself to do my thankful post. I'm not in a bad mood, and i'm not unhappy, i'm just a bit unmotivated! And i keep getting questions from people 'are you alright'?
Yes i'm very very alright, just having one of those moments when you need to recharge and refresh (like the coke promo that was cancelled, the maximum you could win was 50 bucks when you've even bought the cold for 60 bucks, awon ole!*)lol...i'm an eagle, i need time to renew myself, guess that's where i've been the past few days.

What's it with Naija service providers??? They just make me wanna pull out my hair! In the last few days, i've had issues with everything i own that has some form of technology; internet on my computer, my blackberry, even DSTV joined them today. What do the customer service guys in Multichoice do for crying out loud! No offences meant but i was on the phone with them for at least 4 minutes about 5 times today and they couldn't resolve my issue. Crap! They all seemed to be reeling out info from the same textbook...pshew. Bring out your smartcard, switch off your decoder and reinstall dish then insert your smsrt card again, it will work'. Duh, did i not just tell you i've done that like 10 times already?? Arrgghhh...they make me wanna pull out my hair! But i won't o, i'm even braiding it at the moment. Ok lemme spare you the lamentation.

What do you do when someone keeps showing up at your house almost every blessed day unannounced? They make themselves welcome and treat themselves to goodies from the fridge. We're not the best of friends but we're not enemies either. I feel as if i gave this person too much access but i just can't stick it anymore. I'm sure i'm a nice person but i'm starting to feeI 'unnice'. I love my ME time and i honestly don't stay home to play, I WORK FROM HOME!!! I've asked a few friends and their opinion have helped me. I actually gave the security instructions yesterday that i didn't want a guest, i don't know if the person in question showed up or not and i really don't care. Some people don't just get hints. There are some people i like to see everyday but unfortunately this person doesn't fall within that category. How would you handle the situation? I think somewhere in the book of Proverbs, the bible says something like 'withdraw your feet from your neighbour's house lest he hates you'. I'd like to hear your views.

On a good note my brother just got his NYSC posting to Imo state. Did anyone serve there? Any helpful tips you can give me for him? I'd appreciate it.

Will be back soon with a post from memoirs of my childhood! Remember my Iyabo post?

Have a nice weekend all!
*the thieves

Thankful Wednesday on Thursday

2009-02-19T15:16:00.009+01:00

My people, it's Thursday, but yours truly forgot to put up a thankful post yesterday cos i was neck deep in work...and then i had guests who i had to attend to..what else? I can come up with a million and one excuses..lol.
I already thought i'd just leave it till next week until Caelestis reminded me, here i am doing my thankful post because God is indeed worthy of all the praise and glory! Thanks babe
So i am thankful for the following reasons

1. I am thankful for the wonderful man God has blessed me with and for my marriage. Valentine's day was wonderful. I had planned hubby's surprise, i wasn't focusing on what i could get. Dude had sent a message the previous day saying not to bother with a gift but he didn't know i had things planned. I played along. Should i just say eh was surprised? I got flowers and some other stuff ...*winks
2. I am thankful because Mr and i are in one accord. Without previous discussion, i bought him 9 cards and he bought me 9 roses, we both had the same thing in mind, we've been together 9 years in total!
3. I thank God for new godly friends. I'm in a new city, i know very few people but God is gradually bringing people that love Him my way; the kind of people i can be proud to associate with
4. I am thankful for open doors, He sets before me an open door and no man can shut it. Halleluyah!
5. I am thankful for Vera's valentine's day. I prayed she would get a surprise and she did..hehehe
6. I am thankful for my dad's life. Yesterday, he turned a year older. God continues to keep him and the rest of my family
7. I am thankful for friends who can tell me the truth without fear.
8. I am thankful for provision. God continues to meet our needs
9. I am thankful that my neighbour's wife had a safe delivery and he goes to see his wife and first born son on Sunday. God is good!

I am thankful for a lot of things, but if i decide to fill this page, i won't be able to accommodate your list, lol..so what are you thankful for?

Ps: Blogville help me o, i have a stalker and because of him i have stopped jogging! He met me one day in the morning while i was going and he said he was a health instructor and i was doing the wrong thing, depleting minerals in my body without replacing them. Jogging isn't good for me bla bla...i told him well thank you, can i continue? He said he trains pple, dance classes, mild yoga etc. Where? On a schoolfield, i said ok, even asked the address to get him off my back. I didn't go jogging for a few days cos i wasn't feeling too good...only yesterday i wanted to go out jogging and the security guy came with a flier in his hands from this guy. He said the guy dropped it.
Please help me, blogville, how did this guy find my house? I'm scared to go out now o!
Remember to swing by www.soulsistasheart.blogspot.com

(I've had to remove the hyperlinks because i think they're making it difficult to open my blog, i wonder why!)

Honest Scrap Award!

2009-02-16T20:54:00.004+01:00

Happy Valentine's day all (in arrears). Hope you had fun, mine was splendid..my hubby made it worthwhile. Roses, cards..etc...i leave you to imagine the rest. lol

So i got tagged by YNC on the honest scrap award, so i am telling you ten things about myself that i hope i haven't shared before. If you've read it here before, just act surprised still..lol

The Rules
1) Choose a minimum of 7 blogs that you find brilliant in content or design
2) Show the 7 winners names and links on your blog, and leave a comment informing them that they were prized with "Honest Scrap." Well, there's no prize, but they can keep the nifty icon :)
3) List at least 10 honest things about yourself

So here goes:

1. I once fooled myself that i could be left handed cos i thought most left handed people were brilliant

2. I'd rather write how i feel than talk about it. Maybe i'm shy?

3. I've worn glasses since i was in SS2 but i tend to deceive myself that i have great eyesight until i get them nasty headaches

4. I got married two years and two months ago to my first real boyfriend who i met in Uni(as a virgin) and we're still madly in love

5. At a time in my life, i thought only prostitutes polished their nails and had more than one ear piercing

6. I graduated as the best student in my class in University

7. I have always left my jobs since i graduated except for one although at the point of leaving i never was sure of what i would do (think i'm crazy?)

8. I write very fast and hate to re-read anything i write. Most of my posts are first drafts

9. I hate onions, infact i hardly eat them and i pick them aside when i see them in food

10. I didn't have a train when i got married, only a maid of honour because i don't like the stress....

I think i'll add another one..lol though it's meant to be 10

11. I love God with all of my heart!

I think i'm very weird or very honest cos i can come up with a lot more things about myself but i'm guessing that's the same for a lot of people..

Enjoy the rest of your week people!

Ps: I don't think i'm tagging anyone, ok i tag y'all who haven't done this...!

Thankful Wednesday from grumpy WF..lol

2009-02-11T19:05:00.005+01:00

I don't feel like being thankful today, i really don't feel like, it's one of those days when i look around me and although there's much to be thankful for, there's also a number of things that could be better...but Writefreak is walking by faith and not by sight, so i am choosing to be thankful for the things that are working in my life...cos trust me, there are a lot!

I am thankful for a safe trip to and fro for hubby and i

I am thankful for friends who i can rant at when i feel like. Thanks for the listening ear guys

I am thankful for though it seems some things are not working, i have an assurance in the word of God and a more sure word of prophecy! I am thankful for all the scriptures that bring peace in my heart

I am thankful that i got healed from the terrible cold that got me down

I am thankful for potential opportunities

I am thankful for the wonderful relationship i have with my husband and for the things God is working out in our lives.

Everything might not be perfect right now but there's always a reason to be thankful, what are you thankful for?

Ps: for those of you who read our other blog ,it will be updated in the next couple of days

Thankful Wednesday

2009-02-04T10:53:00.002+01:00

I didnt do my thankful wednesday last week, not because i didn't want to but i was really busy. I have a lot of things to be thankful for but the chief of them are these:

1. I am thankful for the gift of life, being able to sleep and wake up is a miracle and i don't take it for granted.

2. I am thankful for the most amazing news i received from my very good friend...i prayed and God answered. Father i am indeed grateful

3. For bringing our household stuff to Abuja safely from Lagos.

4. For the 1kg i lost in the past one week....still about 3 more kgs, Lord i know you can do it.

5. For my husband who is totally open and honest with me. Thank you Lord for giving me a good man

6. For the friends i made on blogville recently. You guys rock!

7. For the miracle He is about to perform in my life. I know it! i just know it!

8. I am thankful for the hope God has given me in His word, He continues to open my eyes.

9. For the healing He gave me from headache once i stood on His word

10. For the may blessings He continues to shower on me..some i might not remember but i am indeed very grateful!

'Great is your faithfulness o Lord my father'

What are you thankful for?

Randy Landlord (the conclusion)

2009-02-02T10:50:00.004+01:00

So sorry i am only just putting the conclusion of Randy Landlord up.I had some family matters to attend to but i'm back now If you didn't read the first part, you can find it below or here . So y'all enjoy the rest of the story and let me know what you think still...

The next week I got a simple email from him telling me he was working onsomething and he would get in touch as soon as he finished. I was mad, this was no way for a man to treat his wife. Had he even forgotten about our son?

My landlord and his wife paid us a visit someday and the woman in her caring way wanted to know what was going on. I surprised myself when I burst into tears, I had been bottling up my emotion. The woman just came to me, wrapped me in a hug and promised me that she was sure whatever the situation was, everything would be ok. The husband had an ‘I knew it’ look on his face and I hated myself for breaking down in their presence. When I calmed down, my landlord’s wife turned to him and said: ‘’honey, why don’t you take our young friend with you to the club today to get her mind off things? I really don’t want to go, you can cheer her up and you will have company. I’ll take Dammy (my son) for the evening’’

I wondered if this woman could not tell that her husband was hitting on me. Why had fate planned it this way. I tried to get out of it but she would hear none of my protests. I needed to go out and be cheerful. I was stuck with the old goat.

I was tense all the way to the club and barely said a word throughout the drive. After having a few drinks though, I relaxed and an evening with ‘the old goat’ as I was fond of calling him turned out not too bad after all, he had a great sense of humour and made me laugh a lot forgetting my problems. I must have been tipsy a bit. I was surprised he didn’t ask me for anything that night, he only asked if I wanted to do it again with a glint in his eyes. I found myself saying yes and I knew the next time, there might be no turning back. He put an envelope in my hands as he said goodnight, when I opened it, there was a sum of N20,000. My heart leapt for joy. I needed cash at the time.

We had a nice evening and he introduced me to some of his friends at the club as his friend and also his tenant, one of them winked knowingly at me and I felt a pang of guilt. I was probably not the first lady my landlord had brought to this place. We enjoyed the evening and I braced myself for what I knew would happen when we left the club

My landlord instructed his driver to drive to a popular hotel far from where we lived. My heart was pounding in my chest as I knew what I was about to embark on was unfaithfulness to my husband and our marriage vows but I rationalised that a woman had needs and my husband had not been there in a long time to fulfil those needs or do his duties. I rationalised that my move was justified. My body craved intimacy and my purse needed cash. My landlord was providing both.

I went into the bathroom to have a shower and left my landlord on the bed, it kept occurring to me that I was doing the wrong thing and I would live to regret it. In all our married years, this had not happened once, not even when we were dating. Would I be able to live with the consequences. I begged my heart to let me rest, afterall I had committed the adultery in my heart already but it would not be quiet. I was wondering if I could go through with the deceit and ever look my husband in the face again or even the landlord. What could be the end of this affair but shame?

I walked out of the bathroom and heard my phone beep with a text message. It was from my husband and it simply said: ‘baby I love you, I am sorry for the agony I have put you through. Please forgive me. I’ll be home tomorrow morning and we can work things out. I am very sorry’

I looked at my landlord, shook my head and told him I couldn’t go through with it, grabbed my clothes, hurriedly wore them and ran out of the hotel room, leaving the man watching after me with mouth agape.

PS:

Hope you guys liked the conclusion, if not, you can write your own ending in your comment...I know..lol

Have a nice week!
Also remember to take a look at the blog aloted and i cohost

Mr Randy Landlord

2009-01-25T12:20:00.003+01:00

Hi peeps, hope you had a good week. And that you're well rested for the coming one...i was going to write another memoir from my childhood but right now i'm feeling quite lazy so i thought i'd put up one of my short stories and you guys can let me know what you think. Hope you have a nice read.
Please don't forget to visit the blog aloted and i are cohosting if you haven't been there.

The Randy Landlord

‘Come out now and defend yourself’, I heard a distant voice behind my bedroom window. I refused to respond thinking it was Bola and his wife my next door neighbours who were constantly at each other’s throat. His wife was always accusing him of cheating on her and in return he would beat her mercilessly. I had gone to separate them while fighting on several occasions. I decided to ignore them and thought they would see reason and carry the fight to their flat.
I turned to the other side, covering my head with the pillow, then I heard loud banging on my door and decided to check the clock by my bedside, it was 12 midnight. ‘Won’t these people just leave me alone?’ I said as I decided to ignore the knock, hoping the caller would take the hint they were unwelcome and go away. It seemed the caller was hell bent on waking me because the knock became louder and more persistent. I listened, trying to grasp what the person was saying. Which of the other tenants would be calling on me at this time of the night? I concluded it could only be Bola and his wife and I got up, ready to go and give them a piece of my mind. If they could not stay married in peace then it was best they separated from each other.
As I wore my dressing gown over my night dress, I could make out the voice of my landlord, ‘useless woman, come out now and defend yourself on why you’ve been rude to my wife’. It was my landlord’s voice alright and I wondered what he was talking about. Did this man know the time was the thought in my head as I stumbled to my door, sleep still very heavy in my eyes.
I opened the door and he was standing right there, half naked, just a wrapper wrapped around his waist. I didn’t even know some men still wore that these days. ‘Good evening sir or should I say good morning? To what do I owe this honour of you waking me up at this time of the night?’
I expected him to be shouting considering what I heard before opening the door but he was all smiles, grinning like an overfed cat, his pot belly thumping up and down
‘Won’t you ask me in?’ He said revealing the gap between his teeth.
‘No sir, I will not let you in, it is the middle of the night and you should go and sleep in your house while you let me sleep.’
‘You’re being rude to me this girl’, he said, holding on to my door so I wouldn’t close it in his face.
‘It’s late sir, we can discuss whatever you need to discuss with me when day breaks’
‘No this cannot wait’, he said as he pointed to the bulge under his towel
‘God forbid! I am a respectably married woman and I will not take kindly to such things. Please leave now before I get very nasty’
‘Relax, young woman, you claim to be married, yet your husband leaves you alone in this house almost half of the year. Let me keep you warm when your husband is away. I can do that very well’
I wondered what to say to this man. I had wondered at the attention he was paying my son and I recently. He would go out and stop by our flat some evenings claiming to have a gift for him. My 4 year old son had even taken to calling him Grandpa and was growing very fond of him. It all made sense now; his sudden interest in our well being, his constant stopping by, his gifts, offering to call his mechanic when my car had a fault, everything made sense now. Wale my husband had told me to be careful with him the last time I hinted him of how nice our landlord was. I playfully told him he was being jealous since he was far away. He told me he was only protecting his family and that he had a feeling the man was not genuine. We did not conclude on what to do but I was not going to treat a nice man with disdain.
Now it all made sense. Why did Wale’s office have to station him outside the city where we live for months on end? His company only allowed him come home for a few weekends. I had complained, prayed and hoped. Now I was just accepting it and hoping our situation would change soon. If my husband was home with me, this old goat would not stand at my door asking me to let him keep me warm.
I came back to the present and shouted so other tenants would hear. ‘Please sir, leave now, my son is sleeping and I would not want you to wake him up’. What was he even thinking standing there in his loin cloth? What would other tenants think if they saw him coming from my door like that? Bisi and Angela were the house gossips; they both lived in the mini flats at the back of the house and made every other person’s business theirs. Rumour had it that Angela was the cause of the fight between Bola and his wife and she endlessly tempted the young man when his wife was not around.
I succeeded at sending our landlord away that night but for the next two months, I constantly received such knocks on my door every night. I complained to my husband who said I should be careful and make sure the door was always locked when we were around at home. He was sorry he could not come home yet, he was on a project and he could nto leave. What kind of job would make a man desert his family in time of need, I wondered. I was upset with him and we had a fight on the phone. He was neglecting me and our son, I told him in plain words. For several months, I had endured the loneliness of a married woman living as a single woman. I lashed out at him with all the frustration I felt and all he could say was how he was sorry for putting me through hell. I ended the call and told him when he had worked something out, he could call me.
Amidst all this, my landlord did not relent in his effort to get me into his bed, he constantly harassed me when other people were there shouting that I was being rude to his wife, then at midnight he would sneak to my window and beg me to open the door just that once and how he would satisfy me. He told me of how he knew I could not be enjoying life with my husband so far away.
My husband continued sending me text messages to say how sorry he was but I knew something was wrong. One of the days when I thought deeply of our situation and how much I loved my husband and was not willing to give up on our marriage, I replied him and asked what was going on. All he could say was ‘I will explain in due time but for now, bear with me, I can’t come home yet’. What was going on? Then, he stopped communicating; he had not sent money to us in the past two months. First month, I thought he was broke and overlooked it, this was the second month and he was incommunicado. I was devastated, I knew I declared the war but it was not like my husband to have both his cell phones turned off. He was not replying his emails either. I thought something bad must have happened to him, but reasoned with myself that his office would have called me. I decided to be brave and called his Lagos office. What I heard was a rude shock, ‘your husband no longer works with us’, the receptionist said in an icy voice, ‘’Do you know why’’? I asked her. Her response sounded impatient: ‘’madam, there was a fraud, your husband was involved in it, any other thing you want to find out?’’ ‘’No, thank you’’, I replied. My world came crashing down. The project he was working on now made sense. My husband was jobless and was now avoiding getting in touch with me. What did he think I would do??? .....to be continued

Thankful Wednesday

2009-01-21T09:15:00.005+01:00

This is my third week doing my thankful list and i haven't had any regrets. It's helping me to see God working in my life everyday and not take things for granted...the list continues to grow.

-I'm thankful for our new dvd/home theatre that accepts USB and alllows me play my favourite worship songs that hubby copied from my laptop.... i am loving the one playing right now, it's on repeat... the song goes...

'I trust in You my faithful Lord
How perfect is Your love
You answer me before I call
My hope my strength my song
And I shout for joy
I thank You Lord
Your plan stands firm for ever
And Your praise will be, continually
Pouring from my heart

I will bless Your Lord
I will bless You Lord
How my soul cries out
For You my God
I will bless You Lord'

- I'm thankful for my hubby who knows how to reach me and always has a word of encouragement for me. The guy believes in me like no other person! Lord i thank you for this wonderful man you have given me!

- I'm thankful to God for giving me a word in season for those who need it

- I'm thankful for the idea He's given me and won't allow me to let go of. Provision is coming for the vision, watch this space! lol

- I'm thankful because PHCN has been good to us sice yesterday. Two days ago i almost exhausted a gallon of fuel. I prayed and God answered

- I'm thankful that i was able to finish my cooking yesterday before the cooking gas ran out*
- I thank God for His provision. He has been good to hubby and i

- I'm thankful that our security was able to kill the rat i sighted in our store last week. I hate rats! Thank God i have been rid of that one and may no other one show up...Amen

-I'm thankful that my blackberry is functioning properly now, it got sprayed with water two nights ago and some of the keys were malfunctioning.

- I'm thankful for Obama. Somehow the thought of him being killed occured to me, i know i have an overactive imagination...lol...thank God His inauguration went well and He has now made history. Yes we can!

-Lastly i am thankful for the new blog aloted and I are co-hosting. And for those of you who have been there already..

May we always have reasons to be thankful and may joy never cease from your homes!

*wait o, Abuja people, where's best to buy gas? this one didn't even last one month, in Lagos, my gas dey last 3 months...pls holla.

Iyabo and I...going down memory lane

2009-01-18T16:21:00.002+01:00

I was in Primary 3 or was it 4, can’t remember, I was really cute, not small…lol, I was the youngest in my class and the few friends I had were at least one year older than I was. They were more aware than I was, I’ve always been very naïve till recently. I digress, that’s not the point of this post.

So I was in primary 3 and Iyabo was one of my friends, we weren’t too close but we were friends. I used to get to school early because my mum taught in the school I went to, remember I said I was underage, she had to register me in her school when I was going to start because all the private schools said to come back the following year, she took me to her school, I was in primary 1 and I aced the exams, I got promoted and there was no looking back. Public schools were much better in those days anyway….i digress again

Iyabo always had something to say, there was always gist. This morning, we were early to school so a few of us gathered around before the assembly and she told of how a boy was hitting on her, yes, we were in Primary 4 and Iyabo knew what it meant to be hit on, they all had stories of a boy or the other, I had none. I thought of something to say quickly and then I remembered my friend, let’s call his name M, I liked him and he liked me, we just used to say hi and smile at each other sheepishly. So I said ‘can you imagine what M did a few days ago when I went to the bathroom? He was also coming out and he kissed me lightly’. I made her swear she wouldn’t tell anyone and she did. I didn’t even know what being kissed meant but I needed something to say. It was a lie and I felt very guilty afterwards, asking God to forgive me and that was the end of it or so I thought.

We were making a lot of noise in the class, I think it was a few days later, and our teacher said to put our heads on our table and hold our lips, of course, we’d still whisper underneath. Some gist was flying around and then it got to my partner who said ‘you got kissed by Muyiwa’. I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me. Nap time was over, everyone wanted to ask me how it was, I burst into tears and ran to my mum’s class.

My mum’s partner; her friend, asked me what the tears were for. I said ‘where is my mummy?’ My mum was right there and they both wanted to know what was wrong. With the tears running down, I said ‘Iyabo said Muyiwa kissed me’. Of course, I couldn’t tell what story I cooked up. My mum’s friend made matters worse when she said ‘so is that why you’re crying? How many women has your dad kissed?’ That made me cry the more!

My mum gave me a hug and thankfully it was already closing time. I couldn’t face my classmates’ humiliation anymore. I know,it was my fault. I lied, I wanted to belong but my friend betrayed me. She promised not to tell anyone. Every time I hear the name Iyabo, it takes me down memory lane. I hate the name Iyabo (please pardon me if you happen to have that name). Till date, I don’t think I’ve ever had any other friend called Iyabo. When I hear Iyabo, my head goes ‘olofofo’*. I know that’s not true but it scarred my innocent mind…lol

I don’t know why but in recent times, memories from my childhood keep flashing in my head…I don’t like the name Iyabo, maybe hate is too strong a word!

*tell tale

Thankful Wednesday

2009-01-14T19:41:00.002+01:00

Last week, i said i was going to dedicate my Wednesday posts to thanking God and so although my laptop is acting up, i have to keep holding the charger for it to make connection, my internet is being naughty and there are factors militating against it, I am putting up my thanksgiving post! nothing is going to stop me from giving my God all the glory He deserves.

''Ti omode ba dupe oore ana, a ri imii gba''*. Oh Lord i am a child in your hands and i thank you for holding my hands and leading me and for carrying me on your shoulders when the road seems to difficult to walk.

It's another Wednesday and for the following reasons, i am once again grateful:

-I praise Him for breath in my nostrils! He kept me from last week till now

-God delivered me from depression. I had a particular situation I was feeling very blue about at the end of last week but God used hubby and some good friends to encourage and bring me out of it

-He gave me the patience and wisdom to handle a trivial family situation that might have become a crisis

-For my dinner bill at Hilton that got picked up by someone

-For giving me direction and helping me to know what to do at the right time

-For helping me to lose some of my weight, now I can fit back into that size 10 dress I was given! Dear God, thank you..but I still need your help on this…

-And I thank God for my hubby who always knows how to make me laugh….even when things don’t seem too right…

Our God is a good God. You only need to look deep enough to know there’s always a reason to thank Him. He’s worthy of our praises! What are you thankful for?

Ps: My people, abeg I am raising an appeal fund for a new laptop so if God has laid it on your heart, pls do not hesitate to obey Him..lol...Really does anyone know if and where there is a HP service centre in Abuja?

* If a child appreciates the goodness of yesterday, he will be able to receive more

A day at the amusement park

2009-01-11T14:51:00.001+01:00

It’s a Sunday afternoon, I’m seated in the living room with my laptop in front of me, jumping from one blog to another, reading, laughing and leaving comments…the TV tuned to Africa Magic, watching a very silly Yoruba movie and chit chatting with hubby all at the same time…he’s holding a glass of cold chocolate and I think ok, maybe I should update my blog…

Last week we had guests, our friends from Lagos came to spend the New year with us and it was fun, they were supposed to leave on Saturday but somehow we convinced them to change their flight to Sunday …I’ve been meaning to visit the amusement park since we moved to Abuja but somehow it hadn’t happened so I convinced the whole crew and off we went to the Amusement park.

It’s called Wonderland and we paid the required fee at the entrance (I’ve forgotten how much we paid), the guys picked up the bill. We decided to walk around the place first before choosing the rides to go on. Our first stop was something called the Pirate ship, it was a ship suspended in the air with some iron like things, pardon me, I don’t know how to describe it. But the pully kinda goes back and forth with the ship swaying from one side to the other. The people on it were screaming and we wondered what they were screaming about. One of our friends was convinced it couldn’t be that bad considering they had been on a more difficult one in SA so we continued our walk.

We went to do the bumper rides and it was fun, it felt like being kids again…it took me back to age 9 when the Ibadan Amusement park was still new and we’d go there to have fun, Yes it was a lot of fun. Hubby said he’d watch so four of us went and rode the bumper cars while hubby captured the moment on video. It was fun, we were laughing and bumping into each other. The ride was too short though, the space wasn’t enough for the cars and it was sort of an anti climax. It ended just when it was being the most fun..but it was fun all the same. I was a kid again! I’m always a kid anyway, people are surprised when they learn I’m just a year away from being thirty (oops, there I told you my age, but isn’t it just a number?)

So we decided it was the Pirate ship next. My friend said she wasn’t going on it, she’d be too scared. We all convinced her and I even told hubby it would give us a chance to make out in our own seat…lol…well we went on the ship, I was really excited. Then the ride started, oh it was the ride of my life..i must say I’ve never been on anything like that. As the ship swayed from side to side doing about 180 degrees turn (hope I’m right cos my maths sucks), I felt like I was coming out of my body and the only thing I could do was scream, scream like I heard those people who were on it earlier did. I was not only screaming, yours truly was shouting yeeeh…one of our friends was at the back and we had recently watched Jenifa (that Yoruba movie, the first part cracked us up) and he said no Writefreak, say ouch, not yeeh and I said ‘Nooooo…it’s yeeeh not ouch’ and continued screaming. All of hubby’s attempts to keep his wife quiet went futile, I didn’t even remember I wanted to make out, the only contact I remember having with me though he was by my side was grabbing his jeans and shouting yeeeeeeh! I think I even teared up at some point, not sure. I looked to the side, my friend wasn’t shouting but it was obvious whatever was happening in that seat between her and her hubby, we’d all pay for it later.

I only got comfortable just as the ride was coming to an end, by then my throat ached! I was glad to come down from that ship, that made me feel like I was coming out of my body. It was wild and crazy fun. Will I do it again? Yes! I’m crazy I know but now I know what to expect and I will definitely have the Mr beside me the next time so I can make good on my promise to make out on a pirate ship suspended in the air…that’s if I’m not screaming again and begging them to stop!

Apparently my friend had threatened to divorce her husband if he didn’t make them stop..she had been saying ‘I’m not marrying you again’ to him. She was shaking when we got off and was useless the rest of our stay at the Amusement park. Not me, I was ready to try other things although my throat burned from too much screaming.

First I opted for a ride that’ll calm me after all the excitement. I convinced hubby to go on a ride where we’d see the whole city from up and just go round, I’ve forgotten the name. We were up there waving at our friends (the other guys thought it was a sissy ride, I didn’t care…and I love my hubby, he humours me). It was calming, just getting fresh breeze and looking at the world from up there, it ended too soon and it wasn’t scary at all!

My friend’s husband was still petting her when we came down ..in my head I was like haba no be the same ride. She was dolling out warnings to him quietly and shaking. We didn’t force her now though we convinced her. We were all scared up there but hey we’ve come down, move on and have some fun, but no way!

There was some water ride which hubby and I and our other friend with no Mrs went to look at, I seriously wanted to get on it but they didn’t want to get wet. There was another dangerous ride, we went there, my friend left his Mrs to calm down. I heard a girl screaming there but I was like, if I went through that pirate ship, I can do this too. The cars go up and down some kinda maze and bump into the sides of the iron maze. I wanted to ride with my Mr but thanks to his long legs, we couldn’t so I had to go alone. I was scared to pieces but I wasn’t chickening out…not when I’d said I’m a tough girl.

So I got in my own car. Held on to the iron rail very well and watch myself travel up and down bumping into things. It was like playing real life car race only I was alone and bumping myself. Was it fun? I’m not sure cos I felt like I was hurting myself for nothing but putting up my face and feeling the breeze while I did that was. What’s life without some excitement? Some adrenaline rush!

We ended it with another go on the bumper cars, my friend was still too shaken to come so she stayed behind with our friend without the Mrs and hubby joined in this time. It was fun bumping into ourselves but once again, the ride was too short and my car sorta liked to drive only in reverse

For me it was fun, crazy fun, reliving my childhood and being kids again with my hubby and friends. Who wants to grow up when you can be a child? lol

Thankful Wednesday

2009-01-07T12:24:00.000+01:00

''Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded...'' James 4:8 (NKJV)

I feel Him nudging my heart and telling me to acknowledge Him more in everything even the little things of life...My praise is not enough. When we praise Him, He appears on the scene and dwells in our praise!

So from now till when God tells me to do something else, i will be dedicating my Wednesday posts to thanking Him and picking out some things i'm thankful for...He's a good God, there's always a reason to praise Him.

I am thankful to God for these reasons:

1. For making hubby and i see a new year

2. For giving me the strength to go jogging almost everyday

3. For giving us a house that met most of our specification contrary to people's negative opinion

4. For aloted and her hubby whose first wedding anniversary is in a few days (she used me no be small for this wedding)

5. For my health and hubby's. E don tey wey we enter hospital, glory be to God

6. For HIs faithfulness to me even when i shenk Him and refuse to acknowledge His presence

7. For the lovely gifts i got over Christmas

8. For the idea brewing in my heart that He will bring to pass...

For these and more o Lord i am thankful.

My God you're faithful and no one compares to you

Heaven and earth declare your wondrous works o my father
Great is your faithfulness!

On a light note, i was jogging a few days ago and willing myself to go on when i heard a loud honk, i knew it belonged to a truck only for me to look beside me and all the people in the truck were hailing me and shouting well done! 9ja for life!

A police officer also asked me if he could join me and i told him to come along, he said not to worry, he would follow me in his car, lol...hubby said the guy for just die, when last did he exercise? lol

It's a New Dawn

2009-01-05T14:52:00.000+01:00

Welcome to 2009...the year the Lord has made.

2008 is gone, it's a new dawn, a new season, a new day

Many great things happened in the past year, some moments were thrilling, some were sad, some we hoped never to have again...the year is gone now, never to come back...

For the past year, i am so thankful, the good Lord saw me through it, and us all and has brought us to see a new year, that is enough reason to sing His worship.

I am set for new things, i am not looking back, i am making new decisions, decision determines your destiny, i'm not making resolutions...decision...discipline...
Just reposting this to check my blog feed, i have an issue with the feed, it seems to be showing my last post as 2 weeks ago so i need to check...pls bear with me...

I am making decisions that will determine my future and preparing myself for the future the Lord has prepared for me..

He has prepared a future for you also, prepare yourself...

With excitement i go into this year, let's go in with a song of praise in our hearts and a prayer on our lips...may this be the best year you ever lived!

May you never have a better last year!

Much love

Ps: To those who read my blogs in 2008, thank you so much, for your wonderful comments, i really am grateful. Blogville, you've shared my laughter moments and my moments of grief. You guys have been there for me and i am most grateful to you all...for being like a family.

It's a new dawn....

2009-01-02T15:00:00.000+01:00

Welcome to 2009...the year the Lord has made.

2008 is gone, it's a new dawn, a new season, a new day

Many great things happened in the past year, some moments were thrilling, some were sad, some we hoped never to have again...the year is gone now, never to come back...

For the past year, i am so thankful, the good Lord saw me through it, and us all and has brought us to see a new year, that is enough reason to sing His worship.

I am set for new things, i am not looking back, i am making new decisions, decision determines your destiny, i'm not making resolutions...decision...discipline...

I am making decisions that will determine my future and preparing myself for the future the Lord has prepared for me..

He has prepared a future for you also, prepare yourself...

With excitement i go into this year, let's go in with a song of praise in our hearts and a prayer on our lips...may this be the best year you ever lived!

May you never have a better last year!

Much love

Ps: To those who read my blogs in 2008, thank you so much, for your wonderful comments, i really am grateful. Blogville, you've shared my laughter moments and my moments of grief. You guys have been there for me and i am most grateful to you all...for being like a family.
Let's do it again in 2009!

Mr Gardener's suggestion and update...

2008-12-19T17:48:00.001+01:00

Moving into a new house requires a lot and oh yes one begins to experience a lot of new things. The staff in my house are giving me a source of concern or should i say they're not ceasing to amaze me.

They recently installed prepaid metres for all the flats in my house and i was a bit fascinated by it since i didn't have it in my old house. I discovered how to recharge it first of all my neighbours so i kinda helped everybody out with theirs so i was feeling like a kingpin...

Well like two days after, i had an issue with electricity so i was asking the security for electrician's number when the gardener came up to me looking all decked up and smiling..He bent a bit greeting me and said 'aunty good epening'. I said 'Yahaya good evening, how're you today'?. He said 'aunty pine, fine thank you. he was smiling again'. I thought ok maybe Yahaya has won the jackpot..

Then he said 'aunty you know say this metre e dey run well well. E go good make we work for am'. I didn't get him so i said 'what?'
He said 'my brother e dey po (for) nefa (nepa) and e pit helf you work po am. E go just adjust am small and the money no go run. Na only small money you go gip am'
I got the message, this guy wanted me to defraud PHCN. For what reason? I was a bit taken aback so i just told him ok.
Like a lot of people will say 'my hand fell'. Later i thought of a million and one things i could have said to him but i was just too shocked. I didn't know people did such things with prepaid metres

I would never defraud, it's part of the reason our beloved country is still where it is now. Am i overreacting? Or will you take your gardener's suggestion?

Meanwhile, i thought i had seen the end of it with my security guy's begging...only to be wowed. I kept getting calls from a carpenter i used to do a few things in the house to the point that i felt i was being stalked.

While jogging in the morning sometimes last week, he suddenly appeared out of nowhere when i slowed down and greeted me, i wondered where he came out of. He wanted to know if i knew about the person in my BQ and if they needed a wardrobe as he could construct for them. This was after he has called randomly thrice. I said i'd let him know if i found out, he also wanted to know if i was travelling out of Abuja.

Later in the day, he paid a visit, said his wife wanted to say hello...in my head, i was like what for...then i told them to come in, she said no, they would stay outside but she wanted to see me. Then she started the cock and bull story of how her husband had not been paid by people who owe him, how everyone in their family was sick, the carpenter even wanted me to see his nose since there was a boil in there...how gross...the long and short of the story, aunty please help us.

I was speechless, the stalking made sense...i went inside to talk to my friend that was visiting and he suggested i give them some money so they could go away. I wanted to give them 1k but ended up giving them 2k because he thought 1k was too small (i felt bad i didn't follow my instincts afterwards)...anyway so i gave them 2k and sent them off.

Next i walked to the gate and had a frank talk with one of our security guys, never let anyone in unless you clear with me. See me see peace o!

Christmas was fun, we were in Lagos for a few days and it was a flurry of activities. Hubby got me a nice perfume and i also got a nice swatch wristwatch and a blackberry phone from my friends...Hope you guys had a fun christmas and remember the reason for the season- Christ the saviour!

Cheers y'all

When should i give?

2008-12-19T17:27:00.000+01:00

I'm a bit confused as per what circumstances one should give people money. I deliberately don't give beggars money, i don't believe in it cos a lot of them are actually ok and fit enough to work, i'd rather give someone i know who is ready to work and actually struggling to make a living than just open my purse and dash everyone who begs on the street money.

I remember i became tougher on this issue when one Sunday in my church a lady approached me with 2 children in hand and said she needed transport fare to get she and her children home from church. I immediately pitied her and asked where she lived, asked how much would get her there and even added extra. I walked away and came back to meet this woman telling someone else the same story. Apparently this was her source of income, i felt used and since then i would always direct any such people to the welfare department in church. They give stuff after service on sundays. This was about 3 years ago, will it be surprising to say i still saw the same woman a few weeks back, still holding two children and doing the same trade-begging. Why would an able bodied woman use such tactics to extort money from people? It's beyond me.

There's also this guy who has told my hubby this same 'i need transport fare' story in church almost every sunday for over a year. He makes a point of sending him to the welfare department like me. I wonder if the guy doesn't remember his face cos he asks him every Sunday and gets the same response.

So we recently moved into a new place where the security guys and gardener are paid by the tenants. I have given them a tip once in a while when i send them to do stuff and maybe that has made them bold i wonder. A few days ago, the two security guys were both talking about how they were expected to send money to their folks back in the village, even the younger looking of both of them said he was married and had a son, i was like wow. They jokingly said 'aunty make una help us o' and i responded by saying God will help us all.

A few days later, i heard the door bell early in the morning, i was home alone and wasn't expecting anybody only for me to open the door and it was one of the security guys. I asked what he wanted, he said they were suffering and even money to eat was a problem and he wanted to ask me to give them anything i could. I thought that was really bold of him. He complained they were only paid half salary for last month, i just moved into the house this month and i don't know how true this is. He earns 15 grand a month. Unfortunately for him, i had no cash in the house and i told him so. I asked if he wanted food stuff as i could give him that but he said no, he wanted money. E gba mi o (help me)

So i was wondering, is this right? I have given them stuff a few times though i haven't lived in the house too long. I try to extend a geneours hand to people who work around me and i know are in need but is it right for my security guy to knock on my door like that? I just wonder

What he did has really turned me off to be honest and i almost find it difficult to give them anything now, what do you guys think?

Two Splendid Years!

2008-12-08T19:59:00.000+01:00

This time two years ago, i was rocking to some good naija music in my father's compound with the love of my life...we had just been traditionally married, we were looking forward to the next day and to a wonderful future together.

I'm glad to look back and say the past two years have been the most wonderful i remember, waking up and knowing that i have someone to love and who loves me back just makes my days. We took our vows seriously and with our hearts lifted to God and i'm glad to say we have had no cause to regret.

We've had very very few rough patches, almost can't remember them, we never argue pointlessly, we always resolve our issues amicably and there has never been a fight between us. Infact i can't remember going to bed angry with my husband. How can i be angry with myself? The two are one

I have a wonderful marriage even if i say so myself and so for this i thank the Lord. He is the divine orchestrator who brought us together eight years ago, kept us for six years in His will, helped us to keep the marriage bed undefiled...and now He is working out in us a heaven on earth marriage. I feel blessed, i am humbled that God has chosen to bless my life so much. My marriage will be two years tomorrow and it doesn't even feel like a year yet.

I have a womderful hubby, and i am grateful to God for him. This post is dedicated to the love of my life, the man of my dreams, my best friend and dream partner, the father of my children and my soul mate...blogville please help me stand up and give the Lord and my husband a standing ovation.

It's been two wonderful years and if i were to borrow a song from Styl Plus, i would say:

Two years don waka,
we still dey carry go,
nobody waka
nobody go solo,
baba God e, na our case o,
na your grace o...
A dupe o!

It feels like yesterday...i am grateful!

I Believe in God...

2008-12-01T07:22:00.000+01:00

I believe in God...for so many reasons, these are only a few...

The skies- i look at them and can only come to a conclusion that a supreme being is behind it all
There is day and there is night! They just didn't happen, someone created them and it's definitely not someone like me
Oh we also have the moon and the stars, they testify
I see Him working in my life everyday! I sleep and i'm able to wake up whole. There is a God
When i look at the progress of a pregnant woman, from the moment of conception to the point of birth, only an intelligent God can make it so!
The different stages of the development of a child from when he starts suckling to sitting, crawling and taking the first few steps tell me there is a God, that just didn't happen!
The different abilities that humans have and the distinct qualities, only a God with endless resources can give such diversity!
How many two people share the same thumbprint? None! God is the master architect!
Not forgetting, i have personal testimonies of the existence of God, the almighty! There have been so many miracles over the years that i'm sure I BELIEVE IN GOD!
And more importantly, beyond what i can see and feel, my spirit bears witness, i know deep down that there is a God. Don't ask me to prove it, i can't but i know it! Faith is from the inside, not the outside.
Though i can't prove it, there are signs that tell us everyday that there is a God, only a fool (according to the bible which i also believe in) will say there is no God.
This is my creed- I believe in God! He exists in my past, present and future!
I could come up with a million and one reasons why i believe in God, these are only a few.
I believe in God. Do you?

JJC - Lots of change....

2008-11-21T21:58:00.000+01:00

A lot is changing in my life..a lot has changed and a lot more is going to change.

Dear husband got an offer in Abuja, yes the federal capital territory, he wasn't so sure of it initially partly because we'd have to relocate our lives but i encourgaed him because i knew it was a very good move for him, so now he has taken the job and our lives will never remain the same again..

So i am a jjc in a city i have visited a few times before, i used to see it as a vacation spot cos Mr used to be on projects there and i would go and spend some time, living la vida loca, staying in hotels etc...now i see the city differently, trying to picture it as my new home.

I have had almost two weeks there, i love the wide roads, the calm spirit and we have both decided it's a good place to bring up kids. I love the fact that the streets have side walks and that they have street lights though a number of them are no longer working (we miss you El Rufai). I love the fact that cabs are cheap...i love a lot of things in Abuja but i hate the fact that accommodation in the main city (not on the outskirts) is so expensive. We have decided it's no use staying outside the town..i so hate Abuja landlords, but i will soon be one myself by God's grace..

Our first few days, we took a walk and i said wow, i almost have no friends in this city and we agreed in no time, we'd make new ones, then hubby suggested i title my next blog post JJC- friends wanted..lol..

I am back in lagos for a few days and strange i miss Abuja a lot, traffic in Lagos is running me mad, i drove a 5 minute distance for over an hour yesterday. I am hating the traffic so much! I am looking forward to making a new home, although i wish the home was set and all i had to do was move into it. Now i have to set up a new home, great! But for now, i live in two worlds!

I see it as a new season and one that is full of blessings for my husband and i. I am looking forward to settling down in the new city and will hopefully fill you all in on how i get on....maybe a weekly update? Might be awol for a few days again considering i'm up and down but i will always be back, i love blogville too much!

Have a nice weekend people!

Who do i say that i am???

2008-11-06T14:45:00.000+01:00

Recently i have been going through some re-assessment and deciding what my next move is, a lot of changes will be happening in my life soon and i wanted to make sure that i'm prepared..will unfold the changes in bits...chief is that we'll be moving to another city..Part of the things i came up with is that i have been so bored and while i am doing business, it doesn't always occupy my time so i thought it might be nice to get a job even if it's part time while i write and run my business (which isn't bringing in so much money yet)...
You know those times we wonder if our lives have had any meaning recently..if we're really doing anything worthwhile and what we can do to change things..that's where i've been. Well in my typical fashion (that is changing now, i have promised myself)..i decided to talk to a friend who was in the process of giving me some business to do about it.. how i have been thinking and how i want to get a job when we move bla bla. You know, i just felt like i could be doing more and that there's more to me than the WF that wakes up now..
So i decided to talk to my friend on IM and the next thing she typed to me was ''you know your problem? you're lazy!'' Wow...where did that come from? All i wanted to say evaporated, this was an assessment of me i'd not heard before..then i turned to my hubby and asked him ''do you think i'm lazy?'..He was like 'no, i don't think so at all', his answer satisfied me but i thought 'ok he's my husband and won't want to hurt me'. So i sent aloted a text 'do you think i'm lazy?'She also didn't think i am. So where is this assessment coming from?
I asked my friend while we were still chatting and she said she'd talk to me about it later, what qualifies me as lazy, i wanted to know. I let her know though that i was not happy with her. Is it the fact that i left my job to see if i could hold my own in this society and make something out of a business, or is it the fact that i graduated with a 2:1? is it the fact that i am a writer who is yet to get published? Is it the fact that i don't have the dream job right now? So many thoughts raced through my head and it was a very demoralising day for me. I told my hubby,if i had the ideal job even if i didn't like it, had an official car and a driver although i didn't do anything all day, would i be termed as lazy?
Her hubby and i talked about it later in the day and guess what, my friend was upset with me for being upset about what she said. She was trying to push me she said as she knows i can be better than this. Did she have the right approach...i doubt it. She threw me into self doubt for a whole day and what was supposed to be a chat between two friends turned into a quarrel that their husbands had to get involved in, we're all family friends.
Well, we sort of resolved the issue but i had to deal with it on my own. This is not about my friend and anything she said to me, this is about me! I am not lazy, that i am sure of and what my friend or anyone says about me does not define who i am. What defines who i am is what God says about me and what i say about myself.
I might nto be at my destination yet, i might have missed it a number or times, i might have made some wrong decisions but i am a work in progress and i will get there, God willing! I am on my way to my destination and i will get there!!!
So how do you define yourself? I for a moment there allowed what a friend said about me to define me. We need to know who we really are, hold on to that and go back to check it when contrary situations come our way
Have a nice weekend everyone!

Whom God has blessed!

2008-10-24T12:38:00.000+01:00

Hey my peeps, once again been a while,i tend to run away for a few weeks and then come back. Don't mind me my people, you know there are just times you want to be in seclusion and sort yourself out, i've just had one of those times...And i learnt a bit i want to share with y'all. Meanwhile my dear friend aloted gave me the ''i love your blog award though the reason she loves my blog is still in contention...i'm grateful to her..lol''. I'm supposed to pass on the award to 7 people but i'm going to disobey the rule..to everyone reading this, if i've been on your blog, believe me, i love it! Thanks for being part of this blog family and sharing your life with us...And if i haven't been on your blog before, it doesn't mean i don't love it, trust me, i only need to discover it!

Anyone went to Sunday School here? Remember the story of Balak and Balam? Well i was looking for a particular scripture to encourage me and remind me of how God will always be true to His word so i searched on my phone. God bless the makers of bible software!

Anyway so i put in enchantment into my bible software, i was looking for Numbers 23:23 apparently and when the scripture came up, i decided why not read the whole chapter to get the background story. So Balak had asked Balam to curse the children of Israel and he took him someplace and built 7 altars to the Lord...you can read the whole story..Numbers chapter 23

God refused to curse the Israelites, they're a chosen people, He won't go back on that and instead of Balam cursing them when he came back to Balak, he started heaping blessings on the Israelites. This he repeated about three times and Balak got upset. Balam tells him he cannot curse anyone the Lord has not cursed. God has blessed me, i am His child and no one can curse me, first thing that struck me in that chapter...and i'm like God, thank you i'm invincible...too strong to be defeated..

Verse 19 talks about the infallibility of God's word.''God is not a man that he should lie, neither is he the son of man that he should repent..has he said and he would not do it, has he spoken and He will not bring it to pass..''. What is it that i want? Is it in the word, do i have promises to stand on? Then He will do it! He is not a man to lie..

Verse 23 that i was looking for ...''there is no enchantment against Jacob and no divination against Israel''. In recent times, i've heard some lies and it seemed they were seeping into my heart..you know how Africans tend to think when something is not right, it must be some old woman back in the village. Don't say not me until you're in a particular situation. I always told myself i don't believe that crap but in recent times i've heard it a lot..i was beginning to think what if? God called my attention to His word and i am glad He did...i don't need any more encourgement than what that scripture tells me...no matter what obtains in my environment, i am a blessed child..

God's word never fails, it works so long as we have faith...It's as simple as this..am i a child of God? Yes..Then i am blessed and no one can curse me! I am she whom God has blessed!

So are you...if you have a relationship with Him

God bless y'all!

Finally, we went to Ilorin!

2008-10-07T20:58:00.000+01:00

For the past two years or so, hubby has developed a habit of saying he'll go to Ilorin once he's talking of running away from something or going on a road trip! It became a private joke and i promised him if i wanted to give him a treat i would take him to Ilorin to fulfill his dream..lol..Be careful what you ask for, cos you just might get it!

A very good friend of ours announced he was getting married a couple of months back and guess where the wedding was at..yeah you're right Ilorin. It was not a wedding we were permitted to miss so i told him..''guess what baby, your dreams are about to come true!''

We weren't sure if we would drive or not then our friends; a couple said they were going so we agreed we'd ride together, hubby was saved the hassle of driving. Thank God we didn't, we'd have been so lost! The journey took about 5 hours by road, from Lagos to Ibadan was a smooth ride apart from some traffic on the way, we've all done that before so it wasn't anything new...it was a nice journey, four friends travelling together, we had fun gisting and stepping to each other.

Then we got to the second part of the journey. Our friend who was driving knew a route that would cut out the bad parts of the road and save us some good time, only we saw some indigenes telling us to change our route, we didn't know the reason but saw a few other cars turned back. We were left with the Oyo road...very terrible road i must say! Then i knew why most people don't mention travelling to Ilorin!

There were several trucks travelling on both sides of the road and the road was quite bad, i didn't sleep well the previous night and would have closed my eyes for a nap but the road was pretty bad and we all had ot be alert...i still managed about thirty minutes nap though! lol

We were really late for the wedding! The church service was over so we went for the reception, i'll save the reception gist...so we waited till that was over and went in search of a good hotel to lodge in. We had planned to spend the night in Ilorin since it was such a long trip and it was an opportunity to relax..

Making a hotel decision was easy after checking two places; Kwara Hotels and another one i don't remember the name. Kwara hotels was the winner as it was a big and nice hotel and the prices were unbelievable reasonable! The pool got us tempted! My friend bought herself a swimsuit though she can't swim..lol

I needed to buy some medication so my friend's hubby and i drove to the town, it's quite easy to find almost anywhere in Ilorin as there's one long major road from which you can connect almost anywhere...hubby and my friend had a swim. I really wished i could swim too but the weather had turned cold and i was nursing the start of a flu. We had drinks and some suya and decided to go in search of pounded yam at about 9:00pm after the rain started..crazy!

So we went to the first place we were directed and they didn't have..oh no! We decided to ask them for another place and they described the way to go to Iya Yussuf's canteen. Iya Yussuf's canteen did not disappoint us though we were surprised in a good way! We all ate and had about three pieces of meat each, the food came to less than N900! Can you beat that?

It's such a peaceful city and food is so cheap! We had a buffet breakfast the following morning, the 4 of us and it only cost us 6 grand! Can you imagine? I wished i could import Ilorin to Lagos...it was so much like being on a vacation and it made me realise that there are several places in Nigeria where one can go to relax and have fun.

We came back to Lagos on Sunday, hubby's dream fulfilled and we're still talking about the trip. I won't be making the road trip anytime soon though! Lol

Lifemate or Baby

2008-09-24T08:26:00.000+01:00

I had an interesting discussion with a friend a few days back which inspired some thoughts that i'd like to share. We were talking about a couple going through some challenges in their marriage and it sent me down the thought path as usual. Speaking of challenges in marriage, it seems a lot of people are having it really rough and wearing plastic smiles to cover it up. I hear a lot of stories these days and i can't but be thankful for what hubby and i share.

Ok so we were talking about kids and how for some people, that seems to be the only thing keeping their marriage going. All their discussions and time together is spent either taking care of the kids or talking to each other about the kids. It amazes me how a couple who used to be so in love can almost become strangers to each other. What they were quick to overlook before or forgive become an unpardonable sin! What was the attraction then becomes a note of repulsion.

We have a culture that celebrates mediocrity and that does not pay attention to the most important things. A couple who has been married ten years and are obviously in love are a failure because they have no child yet but a school drop out who is a single parent (don't get me wrong, i am not castigating single parents) or a forced second wife is a woman and has more respect because of a child. I feel like swearing...*hiss*. I digress a bit but is this the most important thing?

I have seen how many women have kids and it's as if everything including their husbands just fall into last place. The only thing that matters becomes the kids and this definitely creates a rift between the man and the woman. Some men will complain and if no changes made, eventually seek solace outside the home or some will just bear the pain alone and wonder if it would be selfish to demand attention from their wives considering they have a baby at hand.

I know it can't be easy and i haven't done it before so pardon me if i am not talking from experience but some things just require common sense. It must be a tough call but one that every woman who wants a loving and lasting relationship needs to take. Hubby and i will have enough children, as much as we like but they are secondary to our relationship, not that i don't intend to take care of my kids but not at the detriment of our relationship. Children will leave the nest and then what will be left?

I will always remember how i fell in love, how i was swept off my feet, i will always remember what being naive and being in love is like and i will always remember the times my husband and i have spent together. They are memories to cherish and give me something to look forward to. So is it worth jeopardising this for kids who will eventually have their own lives???

Maybe if a lot of women have at the back of their minds that they are only wards over their children and the kids are not their property, it might bring things in perspective and let us hold on to what is important! I hear a lot about how marriage is not worth it without children and yada yada. I beg to differ, i would rather have a loving marriage with no kids than have a loveless marriage with many children. And thank God i don't even have to choose. I will have both!

So my question is this what would you rather have? Would you rather have a baby or loving relationship? Or to rephrase, which should take priority? A baby or one's partner? Would love to hear your responses!

Blogville Award + Update

2008-09-22T17:06:00.000+01:00

Yay!! I received a blogville award from aloted

I'm grateful for the award and feel humbled by it, it makes me happy when all of y'all come up here and say something i wrote blessed you or you enjoyed it!

To everyone who reads my blogs, i say thank you, to all of you who check me up even when i'm missing in action, thank you so much. You all are wonderful and i love being a part of blogville!

Ok Here are the rules to follow:
1. When you receive the prize you must write a post showing it, together with the name of who has given it to you, and link them back
2. Choose a minimum of 7 blogs (or even more) that you find brilliant in their content or design.
3. Show their names and links and leave them a comment informing they were prized with an award
4. Show a picture of those who awarded you and those you give the prize (optional).
5. And then pass it on!

I hereby pass on the award to the following in no particular order:

Aloted
Oluwadee
LG
Allied
Jaycee
Solomonsydelle
Aijay
I love you and your blogs and I think you deserve this award. Take care

So where have i been? I just want to thank God for His mercies and taking care of me when i was down. I was really ill and couldn't even do anything but now i'm back on my feet, thanks to God and my wonderful husband who is always there for me when i need him, i'm almost as good as new and you guys definitely aren't rid of me yet!

Feels good to be back!

...And the airbags came out!

2008-08-29T15:55:00.000+01:00

I've been in two accidents, both time i was driving. The difference is that the first time i was a learner but the second time, i can't really explain what happened.
Saturday night, i drove to my house at night from some far away place like this and although the roads were dark, i didn't have an accident.
Sunday morning, i felt reluctant to go to cchurch, i was tired but i pushed myself and got off the bed. Afterall the children in junior church would be there and i should be a responsible teacher, so i forced myself to get up. No one else in my house wanted to go to church, hubby was tired from his friend's wedding runs and he said he'd meet me in church for the last service.
I drove all the way to church...and passed through several major roads and didn;t have an accident. An evil thought crept in my mind as i was driving of someone dying in an accident and i quickly rejected the thought, covered my family members with the blood of Jesus and quoted scriptures on protection that came to my mind. I continued listening to the praise and worship cd i was playing.
I was almost in church and the traffic light went red, i was next in line and could have run it but i am a responsible citizen clamouring for a new Nigeria, i shouldn't run the light so i waited for the light to go green again and once it did, i moved my car, and the next three minutes, i was in an accident.
A commercial bus was at the bus stop which unfortunately leads to the entrance of the church car park which also is a secondary school and as i took the turn, the bus made to move, i was avoiding being hit from the back and then i saw people in front of me, in a moment of confusion, i swerved too much to the right and next thing i new, i heard a very very loud crash coming from the right side of my car...there was smoke all over the car and the air bags...both of them were out.
When i got out, i was shaking so much from the shock, must have taken me about 10 minutes to regain a bit of composure..for cyring out loud, this was the church entrance, i had driven all the way to have an accident.
I couldn't make sense of it and i asked God if it would have been right for me to stay at home instead of driving to His place of worship. I asked several questions as the whole thing kept replaying in my mind. What could i have done differently?
I placed a call to hubby, my anchor...i smile as i write this..cos he truly is! He asked if I was ok, I said yes, he said go and attend service and I’ll meet you. I was like what! He said what did you go to church for…so I went and attended service as an obedient wife that I was and kept getting stares from different angles, a few bold ones asked why I wasn’t looking my usual self, to those I was interested in telling, I explained what happened and everyone was ooing and ahing…so sorry…like that answers my questions or makes me feel any better. But hey, it’s not my friends’ fault; they’re only trying to help!
Hubby came and accessed the damage and met me wailing in the car…everything was just too much for me at that point, he told me to stop crying…he was trying to deal with the issue.. it was obvious we couldn’t move the car out of the church car park where it was pushed that day, we had to wait till Monday.
Well I cried myself to sleep again that night because I was feeling very guilty, we were planning a vacation and it looked like because of the accident, we might not be able to have one anymore. A friend mentioned that I should be grateful but it didn’t register then. On Monday morning, hubby hugged me and told me not to beat myself up about it, I should take responsibility but shouldn’t sink in guilt and that everything will be fine. I felt much better!
The car is at the mechanic’s getting a face lift and I am grateful to God that I wasn’t hurt, the windscreen got broken and I could have hit my head. I am not blaming God, He never promised a life without challenges and although many are the afflictions of the righteous, the Lord delivers him from them all!

A Masterpiece!

2008-08-19T12:09:00.000+01:00

My head is so full right now, so many things i could write about, so many thoughts in my head and i'm wondering which of them i want to share. My life is evolving and i am wondering what the master potter wants to do with it...but i know it's something good, something really beautiful because He makes all things beautiful in His time

March i left my job, it was a crazy move but i knew i had to do it for my sanity and i started learning to walk on water, the first few days were tough, i wasn't certain of anything and then i went for a 3 week leadership course in church, got an interview offer with a talk show and voila i applied, under a week i had the job.

It was a pay cut from my last job but it was a step closer to developing my God given gift and although i had mixed feelings about it, i was enthusiastic after all i had applied for the position of a writer...note the word applied! Then i started the job and my role was not just writer, i was to find guests, interview them and write scripts, i didn't mind but it wasn't what i applied for. It was exciting at the same time, meeting people i didn't dream of meeting..it was exciting, for once i had a job that was 'almost' fun except for my boss'(let's call her A) once in a while rants..which i thought i could deal with, afterall we weren't interfacing with each other much!

It was easy for me to find my guests, i was almost a natural, only had to make a few calls and they were available, writing my scripts wasn't so much of an issue though i kept going to my direct boss(let's call her Z) for help, she liked that...and she always gave me positive comments, i was her best hand of all the new people she hired and stuff like that..

Then we started shooting and i noticed things that made me rethink taking the job. A number of times i wanted to take a walk andgo home, wondering if i left a crappy job to come meet another crap and since i was no longer afraid of leaving a job, looked like it could be the next move. A was temperamental and verbally abuses people, she said things to me i can't recount for no just reason and a lot of people thought it was because she knew i wasn't desperate for the job and also because she knew i had my pride and would not suck up, is that a crime?

Well, i kept telling hubby i might want to leave the job considering the things going on and he kept reminding me of why i took it and that i should think of spending one more season. In a week, i got all my episodes that i worked on scrapped, had to work on new ones afresh and i did a good job of it even if i say so myself...i got some positive comments...

Then we went back to the office and i had this strange feeling that i needed to resign, my heart just wasn't in the job anymore, it wasn't really all i bargained for and not at this age will i receive verbal abuse from anyone..no i wasn't desperate...they were having meetings..and then we all had a meeting and there was much talk about the coming season, then Z singled me out and said she needed to talk to me. I just knew it wasn't good news

So she said i should take a break from work because i had said i wanted to travel in August and work was going to be evry busy then. The logic was she couldn't tell me not to travel since i was a woman in my own right and no one should toss me around. I faulted her logic in my head immediately and i just knew that was the end of the road for us...my doubts were confirmed! I didn't respond, just said ok, i needed time to process it. You see the organisation has a reputation of a very high staff turnover..

When i told hubby, he said he was sure i wasn't being laid off in a sly manner and even if they wanted me to go, they should come out and say it, i agreed. So i made a call to Z and asked if i decided not to travel anymore, would it still be necessary to take the break? Well to not drag it, by the next morning, she came out with the truth 'we're going to have to let you go'. I felt relieved, cos i knew i achieved something, i pushed her to the wall and it felt good. I'm not someone to walk all over and thanks to my hubby who made me do it..we talked, we strategised and when i told him he was mad. When i asked for a reason, i didn't get anything reasonable, the only thing i could gather was my personality is a problem for A and Z has to do her bidding, just she's a very sly and cunning one...thank God i don't swear..

So i left with my head held high, what am i going to do? My response was a lot! Hubby has always been my anchor, he left work, this was mid day and came to meet me although i had the car..the guy is my anchor, walahi! My life without him would be a mess! So i didn't have a job anymore although i wasn't sure i had it in the first place, i see it more as a contract, we didn't even have a signed contract!

It felt great to know i had support from hubby. The first few days, it sunk in, and it felt horrible, i'd always left my job by myself...and to be relieved of a contract for no just reason was a mess. I think what i felt was more of anger! And then i had to decide what to do...i wasn't going to start writing applications. I was done with that! I had to start walking on water once again! The master had taught me, i only needed to put my hands in his and He would lead me, it was still a bit tough to accept. No income was coming from anywhere, hubby said he didn't mind but how could i depend totally on him? He assured me we'd be fine, not like my salary was so much anyway...

We had this business idea we had been toying with so hubby said it was 'my baby' and i decided to give it a try. How would it be like to be my own boss? I had run a business before but i wondered if i could do it again...then i stepped out...i decided i would run our business and be a writer at my own volition..a freelance writer..

I didn't share it then because i needed to deal with the issues and now i feel like i can...I have put my hands in the master's. He is leading me and i am following, sometimes it's hard not knowing where the next income is coming from but i know He has my back and although i am sowing in tears, i will reap in joy. And my hubby? He has been wonderful, doesn't make me miss working a 9-5...and i honestly don't really miss that life!

He's the potter, i am the clay and He is making me into a masterpiece!

....Escape continued

2008-08-12T14:28:00.001+01:00

By popular demand and a lot of begging (hehehe)..here's the continuation of Escape, hope you guys will enjoy reading it. You can find the beginning of the short story here
It's a long one cos i didn't want to break it and risk the likes of LG begging me to update and conclude the story...Have a nice read

My performances in front of the mirror were judged by myself, I couldn't trust anyone to come into my sanctuary. The only person I informed about the audition in my family was my older brother who advised me to be careful. I was a bit disappointed because I expected more from him. A week to the audition, I checked myself in the mirror and the only thing missing was the hairstyle. I had cornrows and was
sure no artist wore them except the old fashioned ones. I begged Sikira to buy me a wig out of the savings I had in my kolo, she almost refused but I gave her a tip. She asked what I needed it for; my response was that she should not bother. She gave me a quizzical look and shrugged. It was none of her business!
I went for the audition under the pretext that I was visiting a friend. When I saw the calibre of people that came for the audition, I knew I stood no chance. Some of them were at least twice my age and really beautiful. They exuded confidence and I felt tiny, I felt lost.
I decided then I should have come with my brother for some encouragement. I sat alone trying to keep my confidence and pretending to read a book I was holding. The
only problem was I had been reading the same line for about an hour and still could not remember what I read. At least, it was better than staring at the experienced ladies.
When I heard my name, my heart jumped out of my chest and I walked to the podium with legs that almost seemed replaced with lead. I was shaking uncontrollably and one of the judges told me to calm down. I took a deep breath, accepted the microphone that was offered and in a few minutes I was pretending to be one of the popular artists that sang on TV. I transported myself to my sanctuary at home where there were no judges but me and sang my song. I noticed as I closed that the judges and my fellow contestants were on their feet clapping for me. I remember one of the judges saying ‘young lady, your voice is bigger than you!’ I smiled as I left the podium knowing I had given my best. Ola was one of the judges and he flashed me a smile as I left, my heart skipped a beat. I saw him whispering to the other judges and I became confident that I would hear my name when the winners were announced.
Two hours later, winners were announced and I heard my name. Three of us were going to join Ola’s group as back up singers. I was ecstatic. My only problem remained how to convince my parents it was a right move but I was determined not to miss the opportunity. This was my chance to become a successful singer and nothing was going to stop me. I headed home and the only thought that ran through my head was how I would tell my parents.
My parents had a habit of listening to the 9pm news on NTA so I sat with them pretending to listen to the news. Immediately the broadcaster finished, it was my turn. I broke the news to my parents and I saw my father’s face go ashen. My mother immediately shouted ‘lailai, over our dead bodies’. My dad’s only words were ‘no daughter of mine will join a music group and that is final’. I went on my knees begging my parents to understand how this was a dream of a lifetime and telling them how much it meant to me. I watched as my father got up and went into their room; my mother also got up and followed him not forgetting to tell me ‘see what you have caused’.
For several days, I woke up everyday to kneel before my father and explain what it meant to me to join the group and promised I would not let him down. I saw my mother soften and try to talk to my father but he had a wall around him that could not be penetrated. After several attempts, I devised a plan to run away from home. I told my brother who advised me against it but he cooperated with me when he found out that my mind was made up.
The day I left home, both my parents were out and my brother escorted me to the hotel where Ola was staying. It was the day he would leave with those of us that were lucky to be chosen. I couldn’t make his performances as I was not allowed. His face broadened into a smile as I entered his hotel room. He looked at me and said ‘I was beginning to think the best of the lot would not show up, what took you so long?’ I was flattered and could not find my voice. After a few minutes and smiling politely, I introduced my brother to him. They chatted for a while and I heard Femi; my brother say: “please take care of my little sister”. Tears rushed to my eyes, what was I doing running away from home? Was I making a mistake? Should I pick up my bag and go back home with my brother? It was not late yet, my parents were not aware and I could go back home and pretend nothing had happened. But on the other hand, this was my opportunity of a lifetime, my claim to fame. I refused to give in to my childish thoughts.
I walked my brother out of the hotel and we embraced. He told me: “Tope, you know it’s not too late for you to change your mind. Are you sure this is right for you?” I held on to him sobbing and told him I would definitely keep in touch when I reached my destination. He knew my mind was made up and told me he would expect to hear from me waving once and not turning back. I watched him leave till I could see no more trace of him, then I walked into my future.
Joining Ola’s band was initially a lot of fun; we travelled a lot, met people, slept in hotels and bought nice things. I sometimes missed my family but I was learning a lot about my career that I pushed it to the back of my mind. Once I settled down, I had called my parents to apologise for disappointing them and that I loved them. My father told me it was ok, I had chosen my own path. My mother said she loved me and if I ever wanted to come home, they would be there waiting for me. Of course there was no going back; this was my claim to fame.
Ola started to pay me more attention than he did the other ladies. After performances, he would ask me to come and sit at the same table with him, telling me how beautiful I looked and how I was the best singer he had. I was flattered. A lot of times I saw the other ladies look at me with jealousy. They would give arms and legs to be his girlfriends and here was I not even trying at all. I was indeed flattered.
Ola wooed me gradually, and the day he asked me to be his wife was a very memorable one. We had been into the relationship almost a year, he treated me with respect, opened the car door for me, bought me nice and expensive gifts and I was the envy of all ladies. He asked me for sex several times but I told him no I wanted us to wait and do it properly on our wedding night, he obliged.
I informed my parents I was getting married and my mother tried to reason with me that I was too young and should give myself time to become more matured. I was nineteen at the time. It was two years after I left home. My father was very displeased with the news but they were at the wedding ceremony all the same. It was a quiet ceremony at a registry with a small reception. Later in the evening though, Ola entertained a lot of his friends in our new home, they made noise and drank too much. I didn’t like it but I couldn’t complain. I knew Ola himself drank a lot but I was head over heels in love.
We went on honeymoon for only a few days as we had performances lined up. When we got back, I prepared myself for the trip and was packing when I heard him say: “what are you doing?” I told him I was getting ready for the trip and he said he wouldn’t want his new bride on the road. I needed to get used to life as a married woman so I should stay behind. He would be back soon he promised. I was sad but I thought he had my interest at heart.
Ola was gone for two whole weeks and boredom became my best companion, my only saving grace were the few novels I bought. I devoured them quickly and watched a lot of Television feeling useless. The past two years of my life had been spent on the road and when we were not performing, we were rehearsing for the next performance. The rest of the time, I was with Ola.
I was ecstatic when he came back. He bought me many gifts and gave me all the attention for the first day. On his second night back, he said he had been invited to a friend’s party, I asked to be taken along and he said no; “a woman’s place is at home”. This shocked me, before we got married, we went everywhere together. I waited for him for several hours and about 12 midnight, he called the house, sounding very incoherent. All I could gather was he was not coming home anymore that night and I could go to bed.
It occurred to me I had made a mistake in marrying him and that I should have stayed with my parents and gone to the University after all. I was not going to tell them we were having any problems though and whenever I spoke to them on the phone, I always lied that things were very fine.
Gradually I found out that Ola did not want me to accompany him on his tours anymore. I was relegated to the home front now, and I could not even go out anymore without seeking his permission. This was not the life I dreamt of; I was supposed to be living in pure bliss with my knight in shining armour and making waves as a singer. When I tried to talk to him about the issues we were having, he told me I was only being stubborn and that if I would just be a dutiful wife and not make complaints, life would be good for us.
I spent many lonely nights, crying into my pillow and begging God to show me a way of escape. Tales of Ola’s randy lifestyle came back to me but I chose not to dwell on them. My whole life since I left home was one big mistake and I was waiting for the day I would be able to make a break and start all over. I was too proud though to ask my parents for help. On the one occasion when they visited, my mum called me aside and tried to find out how things were and I gave her a very fake smile. “Ola is such a good husband”, I lied through my teeth.
I had very few friends who were not allowed to visit, except Ola was not around and we had to make it secret, I was not sure if he had people watching me or not. Out of boredom, I registered for a media course online and whenever he was not around I would settle down to do my assignments. The shipping address I used to get my materials was my friend’s house address and she delivered them to me when I told her it was ok to. The books were kept very safely in the store, hidden in different parts so he would not see them. This was the second year of our marriage and I could count the number of times we had been under the same roof together. My marriage was a prison.
In the third year of our marriage, I got pregnant but miscarried the baby. He was away on a trip and I had to cope with the loss by myself. When he came back, he pampered me a bit and told me we would definitely have another one.
‘Don’t worry yourself my dear, is that why you’re acting like a widow? These things happen. You will have another one. My three sisters, you know the story, they all lost their first pregnancies, look at them now breeding like rats....’’ I tuned my mind off not wanting to listen to his insensitive ramblings.
He made to hug me after delivering his speech but even that felt very cold and he ended up patting me on the back instead. I lost a baby; our fist baby when my husband was away and that was all he could say to me. It made me sad that I wasn’t wise enough to see this side of him before I foolishly gave in to his advances.
It felt as if a part of me died all over’ it died when the baby died but my husband helped to kill it again.
To him, life seemed to be a big joke and nothing apart from keeping me for himself seemed to matter to him. He treated the matter so casually that I wondered for a while if he ever wanted the baby, although I later found out, he only did that to mask his feelings. He wanted the baby more than I did. I found out one night he was drunk.
‘My silly wife, just a child, the only thing I thought she would be good for was baby making and look what happened. She lost the baby. That baby would have been the most important thing to me’. I was shocked at his words because as the Yoruba adage says ‘nkan toti ba ba ninu eyan lo n pa’yan ba’. That was what my husband thought of me. I made up my mind not to get pregnant anymore until I was sure of the direction my life would take. With the help of my friend, I got some birth control pills that I kept safe in my wardrobe.
This was the 5th year of our marriage and I had completed my online media course. There were a few occasions where I was almost found out but providence was on my side and he never was so inquisitive, he only made reference to the fact that my computer was at least a good enough companion when he was not around. I remember on one occasion he snooped behind me and the next thing I knew he was staring into my computer, I was so sure I had been found out and instinctively, my hand found its way to the hibernate button. I was shocked when he treated the matter with such levity. I’m sure he never thought I was capable of doing anything phenomenal.
‘Why are you closing your computer? I wonder what you’re doing on it but it’s ok, you don’t want me to see what it is right?’ Just as soon as he said that, he moved on to another conversation and for once I was very grateful that he was a flighty person.
The idea that I could escape this prison began to brood in my mind and I began to devise the plan. So it was on this day that I called my brother and opened up to him, he told me I should have called earlier and didn’t need to suffer in silence. I told him I needed to be sure the direction my life was taking and that now I was armed for the future with a degree and a will to stand on my own. We agreed he would inform my parents that I was leaving my husband; the jailor and the home I had known for five years. I got a call from my parents the evening I called my brother and I can still remember the conversation.
‘Tope, why did you not tell us all this time? Why? I somehow knew things weren’t right between you and that husband of yours’
By now, I could hear her sniffing, my mother was crying and I was ashamed. Remorse washed over me. I should have listened to my parents and obeyed them. We were both crying now
‘‘I will speak to your brother, we will arrange where you’ll stay once you leave that prison, and we will all stand by you. My mother declared with authority in her voice. Your father is here and he said I should tell you he is not angry with you'’
That made me cry the more; the prodigal daughter was going home to her parents
‘I’m sorry, I’m so sorry’, was all I could manage to say on the phone.
For several minutes after I finished making the call, I just sat down there and wept, for the lost years and for what my disobedience had made me go through.
I waited till he went on his next trip; I was more than happy to see him leave. He told me he was going to be away for two weeks and I pretended to be the loving wife who hated to see her husband go. I told him leaving me at home all the time wasn’t fair
‘Ola, you know it’s not fair to just leave me at home all by myself all the time. We’re trying to have a baby, yet you won’t even stay at home, all you do is get on the road and you won’t even take me with you’
He looked at me and didn’t respond to what I said which was typical. I decided to make things hard for him so I sulked for hours. I knew the right card to play was the pregnancy one. I knew how much he longed to have his own children so it was only a matter of time before he responded to me.
‘Ok Tope dear, I know it’s hard to be home alone by yourself all the time, I promise we will go together on my next trip. Even if we’re unable to spend all the time together, we can spend the evenings in our bed’. He winked at me. I felt like grabbing a knife to castrate him. That was the only thing I was good for to him; the idiot! Well, I had achieved my aim; he would never suspect what I was up to.
The evening he travelled, I called my brother and all I told him was ‘it’s time’’ and he understood.
‘‘I’ll meet you in half an hour’’, he said and disconnected the call. My brother had come to town the previous day and was staying in a hotel not too far from our house. We had agreed he would not visit so as not to arouse any form of suspicion. My family members did not visit often. I set to work and finished packing my bags, a routine I had gotten used to in all my married years, I had done it on countless occasions, the only difference this time was that I was actually going through with the plan,.
I sat down watching the clock and hoping my brother would arrive earlier than he said. I was very anxious. What if Ola showed up and said his trip had been cancelled. What if he had sent a spy to me? My mind was in turmoil. Five minutes before my brother said he would arrive; I heard the door bell and ran to the door. God had answered my prayer and my brother was early.
What I saw when I opened the door made my heart skip several beats. Standing at our doorstep was not my brother but Ola’s friend; Joseph. His friends usually came over when he was away but not the next day. I knew he sent them as spies to check on meI but I wasn’t expecting one this early, that was part of the reason, I had planned my escape for the day after his departure.
I greeted Joseph with the best smile I could put up and refused to step aside for him to come into the house. I didn’t like Joseph, he was a very lousy young man and all he did at our place was eat and drink, then drink some more. A lot of times, he and Ola would get drunk together and I would have to clean up after them. We both knew there was no love lost between us.
‘I am sorry Joseph but I can’t entertain a guest now. I’m getting ready to go out’
He gave me a quizzical look
‘Is that the way to welcome your husband’s friend? You want to turn me back at the door?’
I was determined not to let him in as that would only jeopardise my escape. My boxes were already in the living room and it would be obvious to any idiot that I wasn’t taking a vacation, I was leaving for good.
‘What are you doing in the house that you won’t let me in? Oh you are entertaining a boyfriend and you’re afraid I will tell Ola? Well everyday is for the thief, today is for the owner. You will let me in and I will call your husband immediately’
‘No you cannot come in and if you try to touch me, I will scream at the top of my voice’. I knew that would not help much because our house was fenced all around.
I was silently praying that he would leave and that my brother would not come while we were there.
Joseph was not going to budge easily because he stayed rooted there and shouted to his driver to park the car properly. I saw my brother’s car in the driveway and I removed the key from the lock, stepped outside and closed the door. I suppose I was too fast for him to comprehend what was happening.
‘Well the reason I told you I could not entertain you is here; it’s my brother and we plan to go somewhere together’. I was not going to let my brother meet us at the door. I left him at the door shouting at the top of his voice
‘Ola must hear this, you shameless woman, you prostitute’. I got to my brother’s car as he parked and as I stepped in, I commanded him to move the car.
‘What’s going on Tope? Where is your luggage?’ I didn’t answer and he asked no further questions. He just drove.
I explained what happened to him once we got out of the compound. We agreed to stay together all day and delay our plans by a day. My brother checked out of his hotel and we took a room under false names in another part of town since we were not sure if Joseph had carried out his threat and if we were being followed.
Later that night when it was dark, my brother went alone, we agreed it was safer to move my things. I paced the room up and down till I heard his knock on the door. We had agreed he would knock thrice before I opened the door. I hugged him in broke down, tears of joy and relief flowing from my eyes.
We talked into the night about the fateful day he helped me to leave home, the last 5 years of my life and my plans for the future. By 5 am the next morning, we were ready to leave; I stepped into the car, armed with a degree in Media studies and into my real future. My brother drove away and I did not look back.

* kolo – A traditional form of piggy bank for kids
*‘nkan toti ba ba ninu eyan lo n pa’yan ba’- a drunk man’s ramblings will be inspired by the thoughts he has had before

I hope you guys liked the story...please feel free to let me know what you think. Have a fantastic week!

....Escape continued

2008-08-12T14:28:00.000+01:00

Back to the Treadmill

2008-08-08T14:25:00.000+01:00

Earlier in the year, i made a resolve to join a gym and go thrice a week, i had moved from a size 8 to a 10 and didn't want to go any further than that, some flabs were beginning to appear in the wrong places..i had to keep in shape so i registered, even got hubby to go with me a few times, trust me that was a huge achievement, lol. This was about the time i left my job so i had no reason not to go, i started out with a lot of enthusiasm, i loved working out so much i would never drop out!
My gym instructor was very impressed with me, i was very consistent and even lost 2kg, dropping from 65 to 63 kg in less than two weeks, i was happy with my achievement, my target was to go back to 60kg and stay there and keep fit..then i started a training program and it became hard to go to the gym although i finished in the early afternoons. I had sound excuses not to go and workout.
For a while, i maintained a lazy routine at home and kept promising myself i would go to the gym tomorrow or the day after, good thing is tomorrow never ends...se, all you procrastinators (i have a right to form my own English words seeing that Soyinka is one of my mentors) in the house, please nod your heads with me!
Then i got an assignment somewhere on the Island and stayed out till like 7pm most days..there went my gym resolve, out of the window! No more gym, it was a nice plan, it just wasn't convenient anymore, being busy helped my wwight remain constant but i had reneged on my resolve even on weekends...then gradually i let go of my routine at home and i was no longer exercising...i was back to my 65kg!
A few days ago, here i am months after leaving my last assignment and working from home, i took a look at my tummy and i didn't really like what i saw, looked like the onset of a bump, now that would be fantastic if i was pregnant but as my normal tummy, it's not really allowed so i started doing sit ups at home and hubby laughed at me asking me what happened to my plans to go to the gym. He reminded me of how he complimented me when i was going religiously and how i looked trim. I felt bad and took it as a challenge and i took the car keys, put on my trainers and off i went to they gym.
I hope i can keep it up...will maybe give you the details of the gym escapades later, though nothing interesting really there except for miss i'm sexy, i wear make up to the gym and i call the instructor every two minutes!
How many times have we started out on something that seems to be a very good plan, starting with a lot of zeal and passion and then weeks or months down the line, we get tired, or we meet some obstacles and we throw in the towel. Good intentions are never enough, what you do with the good intentions or what you keep doing with the good intentions is what matters. I'l throw this question to you, what will you do with what you know to do in the face of contrary circumstances? Would you just let go of your belief or would you press on and consistently do what you believe?

Anyway, enough about my gyming experience and philosophising...i'm working on a short story and want to give you guys a sneak peek into it, let's title it Escape...
Curtains open..reveal characters...

ESCAPE
I woke up to plan my escape from a prison, not a typical kind of jail but a prison all the same. My husband or whoever he is to me went on a music tour and didn’t take me along. He is a musician, and I joined him as a back up singer out of admiration. He took a special liking to me out of all his singers and I felt privileged. I was too naive to differentiate between love and lust or the desire of a man to acquire a woman as his personal belonging.
I come from a very conservative home. My father was a director in the civil service while my mother was a primary school teacher. They had great plans for me; I was going to the higher institution to study Economics or Accounting after which I would graduate and do them proud.
Ola came to Ilu tuntun, the small city where we lived, on a performance tour and the organisation that brought him to our city called for auditions of young talents. He had given them the mandate to do so. I went to audition without my parents’ knowledge. I was only seventeen but I was wiser than my parents or so I thought. I knew if they found out, they would be disappointed that I did not mention it to them but I was also sure that they would frown at the idea. I registered for the audition and began preparing myself for my debut performance. I had a dress I wanted to wear in mind; the one that mother bought for me last Christmas. Everyone complimented me when I wore it and all the young boys around my area wanted to court me.
I would lock the door, dress up, and sing in front of the mirror, trying to imitate the artists I so much admired and watched on the TV all the time. Most days I would watch them and imagine myself on the stage instead of them. I was enchanted. Mother never allowed me to watch them until I turned sixteen and finished my Secondary education.
I had a secret admiration for them and a few times when I attempted to tell Mother how I would love to be like them. She would shake her head and say 'Tope, you will not become a harlot, not while your father and I are alive. No child of mine will be a singer, God forbid!’ She would snap her fingers over her head in the usual Yoruba fashion.
I decided not to talk to her about it anymore. She was too old fashioned anyway and I was convinced all artists could not be women of easy virtue. Sikira, our house maid suffered for it though as I perpetually bore her with tales of how I would one day become a star and sing all over the world and how I would then tell my mother not all musicians were loose people..... (to be continued maybe..hehehe)

All I'll Ever Need- Point of Grace

2008-08-01T12:13:00.000+01:00

I got tagged by Taureen minx, i take it to mean i was tagged because she tagged anyone that wants to do this. Lol, it’s fun, and i think i cheated on one, i don’t have to tell you which one o
MEME Rules

1. Put Your iTunes/ music player on Shuffle
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER WHAT!!!

After you’ve answered all of the questions, tag 5 other people and then let them know they’ve been tagged to do the meme themselves!

Here we go

IF SOMEONE SAYS “IS THIS OKAY” YOU SAY?

Beautiful Saviour- Darlene Zcech
I let the saviour lead me...so things are ok

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
Silent Night-Yolanda Adams

I don’t know how to interprete this jo!

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL
Be Without You- Mary J Blige
Erm ok, i cant be without the man in my life!

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
I Need You- Marc Anthony
I need the Lord, i need my hubby...erm yah

WHAT IS YOUR LIFES PURPOSE?
Breath of God- Point of Grace
My life’s purpose is for the breath of God to fill my life, every one of my moves and steps

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
See mi So- 2 Face
I'm sure they think that God has blessed me and blessed them with me! Hehehe...how conceited!

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
You Are My All in All- Point of Grace
My parents are my treasure...after God and hubby , they’re all in all...there was a point in my life that they were my all in all sef, like when i was a baby..lol

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN
Careless Whisper- Dave Coz
Loyalty to the people i love!

WHAT IS 2+2?
Gringo – Akon
I don’t even know the song o, 2+2 is 4 jare..or ..i don’t know

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BESTFRIEND?
Happy People- R Kelly.
When i think of my best friends, i am happy and thoughts of them sometimes...mark the word sometimes..want to make me dance..

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Promise of Prayers- Point of Grace
I always have my hubby covered, i’m sure he can count on me. I will always be a friend

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Nothing For You- Lagbaja
Before hubby, there was nothing for any of the guys that came my way

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
When U Cry- TOK
This song i don’t even know. Am i allowed to cheat and go to the next song. Yes i will, who made the rules sef? Oh ok, it’s saying Lord help me, when you cry i cry...i know the song o...Ok,,i want to be a pillar of support to people who are close to me, smiling when they smile and crying with them when they need me to. I want people to be able to look up to me. And i want the father to always help me

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
My heart is set on you- Point of Grace
Of course he knows my heart always belongs to him, no space for anyone else...no other love will do!

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Give Thanks- Don Moen
I think my parents will always give thanks when they remember me. And oh yes my name even testifies to that!

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
If Love Is A Crime- 2Face Idibia
I don’t know if this can be a wedding song, I definitely din’t dance to this on my wedding day but still everytime that i look into his eyes.....fill in the gap

WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Shout to the Lord- Darlene Zschech
Yes o there is none like the Lord, i will be with him so they can as well worship Him on my behalf after i have lived a good, godly and full life

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
More Love More Power- Michael W Smith
Hmmm i always want to show someone love anyways

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Promise- Darlene Zschech
My biggest secret...running into God arms when i think i have fallen out of grace, weeping my eyes out in His presence and telling Him to meet my needs

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Spirit- R Kelly
The Spirit leads us and brings us together...He guides us together

WHAT SHOULD YOU POST THIS AS?
All I’ll Ever Need- Point of Grace
Yes o God is all I’ll ever need!

I had a lot of fun doing this!
I’m not tagging anyone because i think almost everyone has done it! Except me of course!

A real post will follow this soon..feeling lazy at the moment and i think i am battling with flu...will soon go sleep my eyes out! Cheers