Writefreak Blogs Again; Who Do I say I Am?

Say what? I thought she was gone for good...

Hmmm, I thought so too. For some reason, I've been so engrossed in being a wife, a mom, an entrepreneur, a home maker that blogging hasnt been high on my list of priorities. A few times, I actually came here and then I silently went back out. I didn't know what to write. Yep, Writefreak, didn't know what to write! How ironic! I'm not out of ideas, it's just been tedious putting it together.
Maybe I'm back fully, maybe I'm not, I dont know. But it's my space and I can come as I wish, I think....Thanks to a friend who reminded me on yahoo messenger that I'm a blogger..:)

Loads have happened in the past 6 months for which I'm eternally grateful. Hopefully, gradually, I might get to share. For today, I'm blogging about an idea I got from aloted's.

I'm writing Ten good things about me.

1. I love God and seek His opinion on all the matters of my life, even the minutest details.

2. I'm very dedicated to my family. My hubby takes no 1 priority in my life, then comes my little boy (chairman). My siblings and parents are also always top on my mind. I make sacrifices for them everyday and i'm always willing to do it.

3. I'm a good writer. I get compliments about my writing skills all the time.

4. I am compassionate. I think people find it easy to talk to me about their problems. Hubby jokes all the time about me starting a Dear Aunt Pam column in a magazine.

5. I cook well. Hubby says my food is the best :) Not just him anyway because he'll be a partial judge LOL.

6. I am very neat and organised. I can't function properly in an untidy space. I like everthing spick and span.

7. I am quite amiable. People find me very likeable and i am easy to talk to.

8. I am easygoing and don't fish for trouble. I've never kept malice with anyone, I don't know how to do it.

9. I am entreprenuerial. I always quit my jobs to start something, so I have chosen to be my own boss.

10. I love children. I connect with them easily and people find it easy to leave their kids with me.

Gosh! There are actually so many good things about me, I could go on and on..

I'll stop there for now and leave you with this..I'm totally awesome! *cheeky grin*

Writefreak Plus One

Writefreak returns o! Well, she didnt really go away. She was just quiet...very! So I return and I'm not alone. My husband and I welcomed our little man on the 5th of February. Yes, God blessed us with a little charmer...our son.
We feel so blessed to have been chosen by God to become his parents. Everytime I look at him, he reminds me of the faithfulness and awesomeness of Jehovah Elshadai.
I'm grateful to know the joy(s) of being pregnant and eventually giving birth. It can only be God!
This is a short post, my attention is needed but I have to say this to someone. God never forgets us, He will never deny us and if there's something you're trusting Him for, hang in there, hold on to Him, stay in Him and in His word. He'll come through for you. He did for us.
God bless you all. Have to go. The king calls! :)

Thankful

My BBM status all of yesterday was 'Lord I know you are faithful, even when life seems so unfair'. My hubby joked that it was sounding like the kind of things people write to each other in a polygamous home and i told him not to worry, everyone know he only has one wife and he is faithful to her. He was kidding but i was serious about the status. A lot of times, we feel we haven't gotten what we deserve, or maybe people close to us but the bible makes me realise that God is ever faithful and He does no wickedness. Every good and perfect gift is from the father of light.

I know the God I serve, a faithful one and I'm thankful for the so many ways He is showing His faithfulness in my life and that of those close to me. I am thankful for the following reasons.

I can call God my father without a shadow of doubt, I can call Him my friend. I have access to the throne of grace anytime and everytime of the day. I am awed at this fact that God calls me His own and I am just thankful that I have a personal walk with Him.

I have a loving and faithful husband who never gives me a cause to doubt his love for me. We can talk about anything and everything without fear of being judged.I don't take this for granted. We share a beautiful relationship and it's not just because we know how to, it's because we have Christ at the centre of it all. Thank you Lord.

I'm thankful for the ability to be able to call on friends to pray and know that they will. It's awesome when you know there are people all around who cover you in prayer and that when you call on them, they will answer.

I've been in good health. My family and I are well. This is something I think I might have taken for granted but events in the past few days have made me realise that health is nothing to be taken for granted. Dear Lord, I am grateful!

It's awesome when you know you can minister to and inspire someone. I had one of such opportunities again yesterday and I'm thankful that God used me to turn a heart that was going astray back to Himself. He has given me the tongue of the learned that I may know how to speak a word in season to those who are weary!

A friend has been in hospital and although it seems she might have lost something, all is not totally lost. What the enemy meant for evil is turning out to not be a total loss. For this I'm extremely grateful.

Lastly, The Soulsistas are back! Aloted and I took an extended break from our blog but we're back now and for good this time I believe. I'm thankful that both our lives are wholesome enough for us to know we have things to say to our generation!

I could go on and on, God has been faithful to me. What are you thankful for?

Ps: We have a post up on the soulsistas blog, please check it out and don't hesitate to leave your comments.

Much love peeps!

Are we really free or Neo-colonised?

It's Wednesday, and I'm so thankful for God's grace and mercy. There are so many amazing miracles around me that I can't count.

But it's not really a thankful post. I'm bothered about something and I need to let it out. Aloted wrote a post recently and although I didn't comment on it, I was saying hear hear!

I know a lot of us would rather lose our green passport if we carry any and pick up a blue or red one for life. We hate this country. Does anything even work here? And for some of those who live abroad, when I hear comments they make about Nigeria, it makes me want to cry. There's nothing wrong with living abroad or anywhere but there's something wrong when you see no good in your own roots or your own culture.

Trust me, I know a lot is wrong with this country that should be fixed. We have a million and one challenges. Governance, leadership, etc etc..but it's not all gloom and doom. I watched a show yesterday and all the expatriates that were interviewed had one word in common about being here- opportunities. I kept listening for that word, which sadly a lot of my country men and women don't see.
This is actually not a post about patriotism either. I'd like you to be patriotic though. Your country is your country and even if you do carry another passport, your roots are here. Neo-colonialism is a word I'm sure a number of us are familiar with and I'm seeing a trend that is just making me so sad.

I have been guilty of it too. On Independence day, I asked hubby why the president couldn't have worn a suit and he wisely asked me why he should. Should he wear a suit so he can look colonised? That word got me thinking. But I had my pay back time a few days later (lol). Hubby accused me jokingly of speaking too much Yoruba when we visited a friend. I let him finish and I reminded him of what he told me. I asked him what was wrong with speaking too much Yoruba, not enough colonialism in that, is there? We all laughed.

I speak a lot of Yoruba, I grew up speaking mostly Yoruba to my parents and none of us (my siblings and I) has turned out badly in the English speaking department. Infact, two out of us five have English degrees, and the third person is on his way to bagging one. I speak very good English if I dare say so myself. My mum majored in English for her teaching certificate and she made sure we said English words with the right diction but she taught her children Yoruba. I see it as an advantage, I can hold my own speaking the two languages. Maybe she should have insisted I learnt a third language. I don't write Yoruba too well but I can write it.

On the show yesterday, a black American woman who had lived here for 33 years said she migrated because she wanted her kids to have a culture and a root and she insisted that they spoke only Yoruba in their house while growing up. She said we have a rich culture but we're losing it gradually. I agree and it's extremely sad. I don't do Yoruba traditional worship in case you're wondering lol.

These days I hear of kids who live here in Nigeria but can't eat any real Nigerian food. What in God's name is that? They can't even pronounce their own names correctly! And they think it's 'razz' to speak their native languages. If they can't speak, how can they write??? I'll blame a lot of it on their parents who have given them no sense of pride in their heritage. Some kids won't touch native wear ever, when they can wear jeans.

I saw something on facebook a few days ago and I actually ranted on my profile. Someone wrote 'erekpa lo wah shey'. Is that Yoruba or some foreign language??? I can understand when a non Yoruba peron writes like that but for a Yoruba grown man, it's just totally unacceptable. We should be able to write the basics of our own language. Erekpa is erepa, wah is wa and shey is se. I felt like giving him a lecture...I have seen people write 'jo' as jor. Please it's not an English word, no yoruba word ends with an R.

I bet such blunders might be going on with other Nigerian languages, only I don't know those languages.

I reject every form of colonialism, I am free and I refuse to resell my birthright. I'm proudly African, proudly Nigerian and proudly Yoruba. We should be proud of our rich heritage. I'm afraid the younger generation will meet no culture if we go on this way. God forbid that I let that happen to my children!

Living with the Parents

I have a bit time on my hands so I've been watching some TV, actually maybe too much TV...:)
This post is inspired by a movie I saw on Africa Magic Yoruba. An elderly couple decide to go and live with their two sons. The younger initially refused but the older prevailed on him. The agreement is that each parent will spend six months each with their sons and swap.
The mother gives the wife a tough time, and gets angry when her son does not greet her before going to work. She wakes up early in the morning and goes to sit in their room saying she wanted to talk to her son. The wife walks out (I'm getting pissed already)
The father dishes out his own medicine. He won't let anyone serve him food aside his son's wife. If she goes out for hours, he refuses food lamenting that his son's wife is punishing him. Wife is watching a movie, he asks, and she says she's been watching out for the second part of the movie so she's happy they're showing it. Father in law decides he wants to play a music video at the same time. So she stops watching her movie.
The brothers eventually decide to send their parents back home since they were beginning to have problems in their marriages. I'm totally in support, infact, they shouldn't have waited that long.
Go forward some time, apparently their parents are cut off from them. Both children are having problems in their lives and the younger consults an Islamic cleric (the way they always go in our movies) and the cleric says he needs to get his parents shoes. The son says it's an impossibility. Eventually the cleric goes with him and they make up with the parents.
We're made to understand that these two young men are having problems because they sent their parents out of their home.
I've got a good question for the writer of this movie: does it mean children can't do right by their parents if they're not living together?
We later find out that the parents were informed by a herbalist to stay with their children for some time and pronounce blessings on them daily to make sure they have no issues in life. They're supposed to keep it a secret from the children.
I have another question. Do people actually consult herbalists in real life? Can't we reach resolutions in our movies without involving the spiritual? I'm a believer and I trust in God for solutions but I don't go round consulting different pastors! Ok, this actually isn't about me..
Are we still such a fetisg society?
The brothers find peace after they make up with their parents and their parents pray for them and forgive them.
No mention was made of what the parents did to their daughters in lawnd how they almost ruined their homes. The writer's focus was on the children sending their parents out.
Does it mean parents have a right to run their children's lives or take over their homes because they suffered for them and fended for them. So it's pay time and they must move in?
I'm totally for taking care of one's parents and supporting them. The bible encourages honouring our parents but I believe parents should allow their children live their own lives. Parents who respect themselves don't impose on their children in my opinion. I know there are circumstances when a parent has to live with their child, sometimes in case of illness or some other unforeseen circumstances. A lot of times though, a parent will side with their child against a spouse which might cause problems in the marriage. Many wives have been known to contend with mothers in law for their husbands' love while a lot of husbands have been made to suffer the wrath of protective mothers in law.
Our society believes children are parents' investments and a parent must depend on children as they get older. I've seen different cases though.
I won't flog it. We all should take care of our parents and not abandon them. Please honour your father and mother so you may live long and it may be well with you.
My question to you is this though; will you bring your parent to live permanently in your home with your spouse?

Pick A Side

Anyone who knows me well enough knows that I am a stickler for what I believer, most of the time when it comes to making a decision or taking a stand, I say what I believe unapologetically. I try not to be obnoxious though. If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything, I totally agree with that and believe it.

There was a time when if you met a believer, by their words and action, you could say this person is indeed different or indeed a believer. Now, don't get me wrong, it's not about the mode of dressing. It's just something about them, it's the way they conduct themselves. Their conduct is not an arrogant air, it's just a calm assurance that comes from believing and having a relationship with someone greater.

I'll use the word Christian for a believer. Why the name? They were first Christians in the bible because they were Christ like. Their actions were different. They walked and talked differently and people said indeed they must be Christians. Everyone is a Christian now, so long as they belong to a church. Christianity is no religion, it is a way of life! Does Christ rule your actions and thoughts? Do you submit to His lordship?

In the book of James, the apostle said 'a double minded man is unstable in all his ways, let that man not think that he can receive anything from the Lord'. Who is a double minded man? One who can't make up his mind..one who can't decide where he wants to be, what he wants to be and how he wants to be. One who has refused to choose a side!

An interesting discussion ensued between some friends and I a couple of days ago and it has not stopped bothering me. It makes me ask the question are there still Christians (definitely)? Are we still allowing the author of life to reign in our thoughts and actions?

I came up with a story and said a believer I know is asking his wife to have an abortion since she's pregnant the third time and they're both workers in church. If she didn't do it, he was going to leave her. I said what I thought, abortion is murder and the fact that you didn't plan another kid is not enough to go ahead and kill a life you didn't give. I know pro choice ( or whatever people will have my head), no apologies, I believe the bible. Thou shall not kill has not been removed from the word of God.

The interesting bit is that I was said to be judging and that in matters of relationship between a man and a woman, every relationship has its own uniqueness. I don't really like arguing, most times I make my point and back down but you'll know where I stand. The conversation generated several topics but my issue was not resolved. It was painful to me that we were all Christians and subtly, the guy was excused from his 'sin'. A Christian guy would not be leaving his wife and asking her to have an abortion...afterall the bible says God hates putting away.

I know nothing is cast in stone and there are not only black and white lines, sometimes they're grey...with the word of God though, it's usually grey or white. God doesn't sit on the fence. I think that's why He said, 'choose o man, who you will serve'. I could rewrite that and say, 'dear human, you're either for or against me, pick a side'!

Do our unique circumstances sometimes excuse us from living as Christians, definitely not! If you have chosen to be a believer, please uphold the name of our God and live by His word. His commandments are not grievous!

On another note, women who have had real and serious reasons to terminate pregnancies (mostly medical) know how painful it is emotionally and physically and I think it's so superficial to go through it because you didn't plan another child. Can that person plan when to die? If you can, then pls plan when to give life.

I said to my friends, what if you did everything, took all measures (of family planning) and still ended up getting pregnant. It was disturbing for me that it was silently considered ok to make the choice you have to. Someone said 'if the husband allows her, she'll have a fourth'. And I dare say, it's not their fault, it's because they never stayed awake at night asking God for just one child. If they ever went through the pain of infertility, they would not think it's ok to end a life just because 'it was not in the plan'.

Part of the conclusion was that I'm too shielded, my marriage is too wonderful for me to know what's reality and I was priviledged to meet someone who really loves me and vice versa. I know I am but that was beside the point. There were insinuations that the said woman might have planned to get pregnant. In my story, she didn't plan it but I guess each person chose what they wanted to hear.

This is just one of many instances. The 21st century does not change the word of God. He is the same yesterday, today and forever. He won't change His mind about what He has said.

Whose side are you on? Please pick a side and live on the principles of that side.
The grass withers, the flower fades but the word of our God stands sure forever! Isaiah 40 : 8

Ps. Thank you Rita for inspiring me out of my hiatus. I don't promise to be here everytime just yet but I'll be back..
A lot happened while I was away, I added a year, a milestone, I turned 30, might talk about that later. I love you all bloggers and I kinda miss you :)

Thankful

Bless the Lord o my soul and everything within me, bless His holy name...

I'm thankful for so many things that might sound very basic but I never ever want to take God's blessings in my life for granted.

For being a daughter to God and having a relationship where I can call Him my loving father.

For being married to the most wonderful man. My husband is very busy and under a lot of pressure but he never neglects me or our relationship.

For laughter in my home constantly. There's always a reason to smile even on the very blue days!

For my mum and dad and my siblings..God continually keeps them in good and perfect health.

For my sisters in law and their kids and husbands and for my brother in law. God continually keeps them all in health and we have peace.

For healthy, safety, and provision for hubby and I. It's wonderful to know God consistently watches over us.

For the way God always tries to get my attention and get His word to me. This week I have once again been reminded of how He alone should be first place in my life and not allow anyone or anything take His place. Thank you father for reminding me of what is most important.

For the wonderful friends that surround me. Sometimes I don't find comfort/understanding where I expect but God has given me some friends who continue to stand by me.

I'm thankful for all these and more, what are you thankful for???

Random Rants!

I've been jogging almost everyday for the past one month, well over a month, remember the 3Ps, i sorta continued after the first 30 days and just intensified the pace. I cut short my length and now jog all the way for about 25 minutes and then get back. I must say it's not been the easiest thing to do, getting out of bed at 6:15 am but it's been good. I love the adrenaline rush i get from running, i love that i can talk to God as i get out that early and it has sort of helped give my day more order. I now have to make sure i shower early and start my day on time. It's had a good number of benefits. I haven't lost that much weight but i think i'll get there if i don't give up. I'm going to be adding some more ingredients to the mix that will help me lose weight...so help me God.

Even hubby has commended me on how disciplined and focused I've been. He thinks I'm really trying hard, so imagine how upset I am when I met some spoilt brat yesterday. I haven't seen this person in about 6 years and infact I didnt recognise her. She called my name while hubby was introducing me to someone important and I thought the fact that I didn't have my glasses on had something to do with me not recognising this person. I walked up to her and she introduced herself. So I was like oh yeah, sorry it's been long, I just didnt recognise you. She said something i thought wasn't funny then went on to ask me why i had added so much weight. I smiled politely, then she went on to let me know how after having two kids, she's slimmer than me (not having any kids yet). She was like 'this is not good, not good', go and lose some weight, infact you should start jogging.

I just stood there tongue tied, typical reaction when i'm upset. I wish i could be more outspoken in instances like that. I didnt bother asking for her number or anything, I don't want to remain in contact with such people. I walked back to hubby and told him what had transpired. He was very angry and said i shouldn't have let her get off with it. I wish i didn't and a part of me just wants to email to call her to order.

In the first place, Mrs 'i'm slimmer than you', who is in a competition with you? Is it my fault you have such a low self esteem that you must make yourself feel good by comparing yourself to others? You should watch it because someday you will meet your match or someone more brutal than yourself, and you could just end up with a slap. Infact, I might be glad to be the one doing the slapping! You don't know anything about me, you don't know me, other than seeing me once 6 years ago, so how dare you run your mouth like that! Just warning you, you prolly won't be reading but i'm telling you...NEVER ever stick your nose in my business again! I love myself the way i am, you don't know the effort i'm making...and just don't stick your nose in my business.

I don't know why people think it's a prerequisite to make comments on someone else's weight if they haven't seen the person in a while. Stop it! It doesn't make for good conversation. Learn some tact if you haven't got it. Unless someone asks your opinion about their weight, no matter what it is, please shove it! Or well, unless you're very close to them and it's not too personal to talk about! The next time i get unsolicited advice or comment about my weight, i would be really nasty, i think! ( i wish i could do that!. You'd think i am that big sef...nonsense.

My hair is pretty damaged, i just found out. I'm trying to decide what to do about that. I just noticed one whole side is pretty much shorter than the rest. I think i might have to let it grow naturally for some time and trim it all to the same length. It's so painful though. I remember some years back, something like that happened to me but it was even worse, oen side went bald. I really need to find me a good salon/hairdresser in this city of Abuja.

Ok, rant over, i got me some work to do!

Have a nice week everyone! :-)

A Tale of My Blenders

Any woman who has a good relationship with her kitchen knows blenders are a very essential tool in the kitchen. Blenders, you gotta love them! I have a good relationship with my pink kitchen, yes my kitchen is pink! Some days, it’s a love hate relationship as I sweat over different meals bt when I see the outcome, I fall in love all over with my kitchen.
Ok so the kitchen can’t steal the shine from its component today. The story is about my blenders. They serve me so well, I’m sure sometimes, they want to flee the kitchen as I work them to death! I don’t do the usual grinding with machines that people do. I blend everything, even the beans for moinmoin!
Five years ago, I bought a blender, it was a Kenwood one. At the time, I thought it was a bit costly as I priced others of different makes but the black and silver was so sexy to me, it got me and I had to buy it! See, I don’t like white gadgets in the kitchen, everything in my kitchen that I had an input in how they got there are silver and black/grey. I will never use my money to buy anything white, to me they’re just too clinical! I kind of kept the blender till I almost got married, so let’s say that blender has served me four years!
As wedding gifts, you get a lot of gift items, mundane and useful ones. Several weeks after our wedding, a cousin deposited a gift from an uncle to my house, it was a Binatone blender. I unwrapped it and one look at it, I thought, no way, this doesn’t belong in my kitchen. Yep, you guessed right, it was a white blender with green controls. I decided to keep it anyway as a smoothie/fruit blender. It served its purpose once in a while. I didn’t use it much. My Kenwood on the other hand was always at work!
After serving me almost three years, one of the components gave out, I replaced it with the one in the smaller cup and it continued working. Some months back, I was blending pepper, or was it beans, I don’t remember. The controls between the upper and lower part wasn’t connecting. The blender wasn’t rolling. Alas, my invincible Kenwood blender had given up. I mourned its loss but refused to part with it. I packed it up and kept it in the kitchen cabinet. I brought out the Binatone that hasn’t seen much work.
The think about the Kenwood is that the parts are collapsible, you can couple it yourself. It’s not the same with the Binatone, the only detachable part is the cup. After using for a few months though, the blender gave out on me while Jhazmyn was here. I was making moinmoin for her and her husband (points accusing finger). I used the small cup and finished it up. The plastic on the control part got burnt and that was it, the end of my Binatone blender that I had no real sentiments towards, except necessity. Two blenders laid to rest in my Pink kitchen L
Two nights ago, No Limit was here (yeah, I know, bloggers visit me and I love to entertain them J), and I was cooking, I needed to blend some pepper and it just occurred to me that I could try my Kenwood blender again. Well I brought it out, changed some of the parts of the big cup to the old one, coupled it and tried my luck. Yes, you guessed right, it worked! It so worked! I came to the living room and exclaimed to hubby and the friend that was here; ‘Kenwood rules baby’! I explained to the friend who is getting married in a few weeks how Kenwood kitchen gadgets would be better for their kitchen. He listened attentively, probably just humouring me and wondering what on earth this woman was going on about. Well, hubby told me, his wife is the convert I need to explain my theory to.
So my Kenwood blender is back, in top form, I still used it this night. And one word of advice for you ladies, Kenwood rules! Never buy inferior gadgets for your kitchen!
Have a nice weekend y’all!

Ps; the 3Ps are going well..I think I've only missed two days since starting, Sunday and the day I had shin splints...

Day 2 of the 3Ps

I got out the door at 7:46 a.m, I got back at 8:39a.m. My maths is not so good..o can't calculate how long that was. I only calculate money well :-)

I must be looking hot, two young guys said hello and winked at me as I was rounding the bend from my street. They waved and I waved back. I didn't hear them with my ipod plugged in and very loud. I waved back. It was a good start to my walk! Lol
I must make a playlist of my favourite worship songs, I had to look for them manually this morning as I went. I ws in my own world, at peace with the world and in tune with God. I played a song 'Usher me' by Aretha Murril-Crooms among others. I don't know why some drivers hooted as I went, I was on the side-walk, a few even waved at me. I don't know why! Maybe they were just fascinated! The same car passed by me twice, I wonder where he was going, it was on the same side both times.

I felt like I could go on for a while longer , maybe because I was praying but I decided not to overdo it.

Mystoriesmytestimonies, I prayed for you and I do believe you'll pass that board exam this time. Will keep thanking God for you.

Jaycee is my only committed partner, thanks girl for agreeing to do this with me. If you're interested, you can still join us...not too late!

For those of you who just want to do the 2Ps, you're welcome. I'm sure we will have testimonies in these 30 days!

YNB, thanks for thinking of me, you can see I did this!

Love and peace y'all.

Hope the formating isn't too bad! On my mobile.