Thursday, May 10, 2007

Encounters with Naija Police

Recently i was watching NUMBERS; one of the numerous series that film makers are occupying us with and i told God! death and sleep no be the same thing at all...Yoruba people will say "a o le fi iku we orun" (same thing i wrote in English)....Naija police need a lot of help. The way the FBI operates in that series, i know is probably exaggerated but carries an element of truth.

They have access to information; our own police, can some of them even read properly? How many of them can even boot a computer? The police want to nab yahoo guys (fraudsters) who operate mainly on the internet but they cannot use or do not have access to the internet...quite hilarious isn't it? How will they catch a monkey if they cannot even pretend to be one? Just thinking...

Now i think that's even taking it too far. The other day, my husband was on his way to the airport and the police stopped him (as usual, they always stop and search him...only God knows why!). They were asking for his particulars! God in heaven! How can a human being have particulars??? Please help me laugh o! Well, sharp guy, he gave them the right answer. " am not a car! What would you like me to do for you?". They ended up searching through his things, from office documents to personal effects. i wonder what they were looking for? Have you noticed how they stop you when they think you are young and doing's disturbing.

After talking to over a hundred subscriber sometime back, a colleague and i were going home (he was driving) and they stopped us a few metres from the office....
Police: Hey stop!
My Colleague: Ok
Police : Are you coming from (they mentioned my company name)?
Police: Where did you get money to buy this fine car? You these small boys, they will be paying you big money, next thing, you will take one million naira loan then go and buy flashy cars, this world is spoilt..

My colleaugue and i look at each other and share a knowing smile. We were stopped for driving a nice car...hmmmph! Anyway, after waiting a while, they told us we could go after the most confrontational one of them offered "some fatherly advice".

So who do we blame for all these? I could count on and on or write on and on about encounters with the police...who is to blame? The government? The policemen themselves? Anyway, i know the government could do a bit more for our police force, what with being paid stipends and also they could also do better in their services. A lot of them see their guns and sticks more as tools of oppression than protection. A lot could change really. We have seen some change agents among them that will not even accept bribes.

I dream of the Nigeria where the police will in truth be able to say "the police is your friend" as their slogan is!


Elemoso said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Elemoso said...

I stumbled on your blog looking for some naija blogs to read. I do also blog. I had the same experience with the Nigerian police sometimes ago in 1998/99. I just graduated then from Ife and got this job with this company. The company was/is situated in VI and one of my colleagues and I had to go solve an incident somewhere in lagos Island. Because the incident was urgent and we couldnt get the company car and had to call a cab. Of course our cab was stopped just after bonny camp befeor you go on that bridge that link both islands.

We were asked to produce the receipt of our laptop - This is a company issues laptop and the two of us bursted into laughter. Actually I think it went this way:

1st Policeman - what do you guys have in your bags?

My colleague - Just a computer and some other tools we use

Policeman - Are you sure it is computer you have in this small bag?

Me - yes, It is a computer - we use it to work. we are IT engineers.

2nd Policeman - You think we are kids, you are lying to us that you put computer in the bag. You better bring what you have in the bad out before I arrest you.

Me - I go open my bag and let you see what we have.

I brought out the Toshiba laptop and powered it up and it was running a Windows NT 4 client. They both marvelled that something that small could be a computer. You would think they would just let us go the next thing I heard -

1st policeman - Where is the receipt for the computer?

me - Oga, this is a tool. It is like someone asking you the receipt for your gun. I be computer engineer and just like you carry gun as a policeman and a mechanic carry screwdriver, I carry small computer to go solve a problem.

Them just they look us like mumu and just asked us to go

Writefreak said...

elemoso, thanks for the comment. How do you think they will know laptop? Lol, i guess some of them do anyway, they should all be taken on computer courses...

Will visit ur blog definitely

Tayo said...

Na wa o! lol @ the laptop scenario. Our police dept really needs a revamp. I hope it'll be a priority for the new government

aloted said...

Nigeria police are useless! I have had about two encounters with them, one of which was VERY eventful. I hate to remember the details!