Pick A Side

Anyone who knows me well enough knows that I am a stickler for what I believer, most of the time when it comes to making a decision or taking a stand, I say what I believe unapologetically. I try not to be obnoxious though. If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything, I totally agree with that and believe it.

There was a time when if you met a believer, by their words and action, you could say this person is indeed different or indeed a believer. Now, don't get me wrong, it's not about the mode of dressing. It's just something about them, it's the way they conduct themselves. Their conduct is not an arrogant air, it's just a calm assurance that comes from believing and having a relationship with someone greater.

I'll use the word Christian for a believer. Why the name? They were first Christians in the bible because they were Christ like. Their actions were different. They walked and talked differently and people said indeed they must be Christians. Everyone is a Christian now, so long as they belong to a church. Christianity is no religion, it is a way of life! Does Christ rule your actions and thoughts? Do you submit to His lordship?

In the book of James, the apostle said 'a double minded man is unstable in all his ways, let that man not think that he can receive anything from the Lord'. Who is a double minded man? One who can't make up his mind..one who can't decide where he wants to be, what he wants to be and how he wants to be. One who has refused to choose a side!

An interesting discussion ensued between some friends and I a couple of days ago and it has not stopped bothering me. It makes me ask the question are there still Christians (definitely)? Are we still allowing the author of life to reign in our thoughts and actions?

I came up with a story and said a believer I know is asking his wife to have an abortion since she's pregnant the third time and they're both workers in church. If she didn't do it, he was going to leave her. I said what I thought, abortion is murder and the fact that you didn't plan another kid is not enough to go ahead and kill a life you didn't give. I know pro choice ( or whatever people will have my head), no apologies, I believe the bible. Thou shall not kill has not been removed from the word of God.

The interesting bit is that I was said to be judging and that in matters of relationship between a man and a woman, every relationship has its own uniqueness. I don't really like arguing, most times I make my point and back down but you'll know where I stand. The conversation generated several topics but my issue was not resolved. It was painful to me that we were all Christians and subtly, the guy was excused from his 'sin'. A Christian guy would not be leaving his wife and asking her to have an abortion...afterall the bible says God hates putting away.

I know nothing is cast in stone and there are not only black and white lines, sometimes they're grey...with the word of God though, it's usually grey or white. God doesn't sit on the fence. I think that's why He said, 'choose o man, who you will serve'. I could rewrite that and say, 'dear human, you're either for or against me, pick a side'!

Do our unique circumstances sometimes excuse us from living as Christians, definitely not! If you have chosen to be a believer, please uphold the name of our God and live by His word. His commandments are not grievous!

On another note, women who have had real and serious reasons to terminate pregnancies (mostly medical) know how painful it is emotionally and physically and I think it's so superficial to go through it because you didn't plan another child. Can that person plan when to die? If you can, then pls plan when to give life.

I said to my friends, what if you did everything, took all measures (of family planning) and still ended up getting pregnant. It was disturbing for me that it was silently considered ok to make the choice you have to. Someone said 'if the husband allows her, she'll have a fourth'. And I dare say, it's not their fault, it's because they never stayed awake at night asking God for just one child. If they ever went through the pain of infertility, they would not think it's ok to end a life just because 'it was not in the plan'.

Part of the conclusion was that I'm too shielded, my marriage is too wonderful for me to know what's reality and I was priviledged to meet someone who really loves me and vice versa. I know I am but that was beside the point. There were insinuations that the said woman might have planned to get pregnant. In my story, she didn't plan it but I guess each person chose what they wanted to hear.

This is just one of many instances. The 21st century does not change the word of God. He is the same yesterday, today and forever. He won't change His mind about what He has said.

Whose side are you on? Please pick a side and live on the principles of that side.
The grass withers, the flower fades but the word of our God stands sure forever! Isaiah 40 : 8

Ps. Thank you Rita for inspiring me out of my hiatus. I don't promise to be here everytime just yet but I'll be back..
A lot happened while I was away, I added a year, a milestone, I turned 30, might talk about that later. I love you all bloggers and I kinda miss you :)

Has God forgotten Me? Should I Praise Him?

I've found myself asking this same question so many times. Has God forgotten me? Does God even remember me? Does He care about what i want? Will He come through for me? Then i top it up with the big question, well if God really cares for me, if He really listens to my prayers, then when? I bet i'm not alone in asking these questions. A lot of us have asked them so many times. Sometimes we even think, if only He could just show me the end, then i would be able to believe and hold on.

Wait right there, I want to see the end before believing? Isn't that what i just said? Who or what tells me the end? The truth is that the answer to my question has already been provided in the word of God. The bible says 'faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen'. The bible is saturated with examples of people who believed against all odds or physical evidences. Perfect example, give me father Abraham anyday, he was Abram.

He couldn't see where God was taking Him just yet and then someday, the Lord Jehovah needed to work on His imagination, He took him out, He told him to look at the stars in the heaven, his descendants were going to be as many as the stars he couldn't count. I can imagine Abram then telling God come on, you're the biggest joker! God needed to work on his mind to get him to the point he needed to get to. Then, Abraham saw it, he caught a picture of himself the way God saw him, his name changed. He became the father of many nations. I bet he got really mocked by people around him, he's childless and he calls himself a father of many nations. He didn't consider the mockery, his wife's name even got changed, she became Sarah from Sarai, the queen of princesses. Wow! they saw, and gradually, they became!Faith calls the things that are not like they are ( faith does not call the things that are as they are not, note!).That means i really don't have to see the physical picture or see the desired end before i believe, that is just contrary to what the bible says. It is contrary to what God's word says.

I only need to go to the word, find what it says concerning my situation, and i stay with it, paint a picture of what it says in my mind, keep thinking about it, not letting it leave me, then one day, it will happen, what i desire will manifest in the physical, halleluyah!God's word has the answers to any situation of life, nothing escapes Him and He is very interested in every area of our lives. How long do i need to hold on for? How long do i need to believe for? Oh, for as long as it takes!

Unfortunately, being in and out of faith only tends to prolong our waiting days. It's like trying to jumpstart a car and putting it in reverse, everytime it attemps to move, you're back to the beginning ( i wonder if this analogy makes sense). When you step out of faith, you undo all the good you've done and you have to start again! I think i'd rather just stay in faith then so i can cut short my waiting time...It's not the easiest thing to do, but faith sure works..sometimes we get discouraged and then start asking why do we need to go through our situations?

Why do i need to have extra faith for what others seem to get so easy? Well, welcome to the real world. The person probably has something they want so desperately that they don't have to and even if they don't, comparison only makes you and i fools according to the word of God. We're running different races, so don't compare! Is God the reason you don't have what you want? No, God never tempts us with evil. Sin came into the world and all other tribulations with it which is why we must recreate our world with the word of God. When

God wanted to create, what did He do? He spoke! The bible says '....we believe and so we speak'. Speak to me for five minutes and i can tell what you believe already! You can't tell me you have faith and confess negative things. No! That is not faith...faith speaks! You can't not speak if you have faith. The devil will paint pictures in your mind, you must be ready to reply him, speak! What do you speak? The word of God!Has God forgotten you and i? No..the bible says He has us etched in the palm of His hands. He has the number of hairs on our heads numbered to the last one, come on, He cares! He has loved us with an everlasting love.

God is not a wicked God, He has given us all that pertains to life and godliness. He only asks us to have faith, it is the heavenly currency in exchange for all He has already done. I bet sometimes when we pray, God shakes His head and says if only you knew it was yours already, if only you stopped praying in unbelief and give me some faith. I have done it, it's yours for the taking.You might say Writefreak is going all preachy, well, these are the things God is teaching me and i'm on a journey of faith with Him. Very soon, I will share a testimony with you all...and then, i will tell you more about holding on because very soon, very soon, there shall be a performance of the things God has spoken. Halleluyah! God is not a wicked God, He does not want us to suffer and He is not the reason some things are not working out, although He will eventually use it for His glory if we bring faith to the table. So there, we have the answer to my first paragraph, unbelief is what gives birth to those questions.Have a believing rest of the week people.

Oh it's Wednesday and for these things i am thankful...

I thank God for a very very dear person to my heart put to bed safely and i have the honour of being godmother. Lord my heart is filled with joy for this little one that you have blessed my friend's family with and i am just honoured and awed that i'm a part of it, thank you Lord.

I'm thankful for a wonderful group of women God brought me in touch with to stir up my faith. My steps are indeed being ordered by the Lord.

I'm grateful for my marriage, my husband is a solid rock and i will never take it for granted. It amazes me everytime people ask us if we're still newly weds, it's your doing father and i am indeed grateful.

I'm grateful to God because He is never late and He always appears right on the scene.

I'm thankful for my health and wellbeing and of those close to me. It is indeed a blessing...

What are you thankful for?

I Believe in God...

I believe in God...for so many reasons, these are only a few...

The skies- i look at them and can only come to a conclusion that a supreme being is behind it all
There is day and there is night! They just didn't happen, someone created them and it's definitely not someone like me
Oh we also have the moon and the stars, they testify
I see Him working in my life everyday! I sleep and i'm able to wake up whole. There is a God
When i look at the progress of a pregnant woman, from the moment of conception to the point of birth, only an intelligent God can make it so!
The different stages of the development of a child from when he starts suckling to sitting, crawling and taking the first few steps tell me there is a God, that just didn't happen!
The different abilities that humans have and the distinct qualities, only a God with endless resources can give such diversity!
How many two people share the same thumbprint? None! God is the master architect!
Not forgetting, i have personal testimonies of the existence of God, the almighty! There have been so many miracles over the years that i'm sure I BELIEVE IN GOD!
And more importantly, beyond what i can see and feel, my spirit bears witness, i know deep down that there is a God. Don't ask me to prove it, i can't but i know it! Faith is from the inside, not the outside.
Though i can't prove it, there are signs that tell us everyday that there is a God, only a fool (according to the bible which i also believe in) will say there is no God.
This is my creed- I believe in God! He exists in my past, present and future!
I could come up with a million and one reasons why i believe in God, these are only a few.
I believe in God. Do you?

Proliferation of Religious Groups and Activities on Lagos/ Ibadan Expressway; Way Forward?

Going to Ibadan from Lagos has become a harrowing experience for travellers these days, one can never tell how the road will be. It can take up to 7 hoursl; the same length of time one would spend travelling to Abuja by road from Lagos. I for one have been a witness on at least three occasions.

The express has become a haven for many religious bodies and there are of the nuparticular weekends to avoid on the express especially the first and last Saturdays of the month. One merous religious groups will definitely be engaged in their activities on one of these Saturdays. At a few kilometres apart on the express, one sees signboards of different churches especially.

I am not averse to Christianity or worship. Infact i am a professed believer and i love to worship God but i believe that Christians should be socially responsible, maybe even more than people of other faith. Maybe this is why i get angry when i am on the express and i am wasting precious time because my brothers and sisters in Christ have just had a programme and somehow the roads are congested. You even find some of them driving one way!

Some of the bodies have gotten their acts down and cause not so much traffic anymore but the rest have to work at it and save Nigerians the stress we face. I remember a trip last year around the Easter period when a popular church had a programme, i spent 8 hours travelling to Ibadan, it made me almost hate the church, i was disgusted! "Why should i suffer like this because a church is having a programe?" were my thoughts.

One definitely cannot say all the groups should move, (although one wonders if the camp sites HAVE to be around here) but maybe they should find a means of controlling their traffic and people. At least some groups have come up with different parking spaces which has in a way solved the traffic from their end.

The religious groups on the express should rise up and become and become socially responsible and stop causing unnecessary traffic. Time is too precious for that!

Recipe for Love

I was inspired yesterday by a friend to write down these things when i asked if he had a girlfriend and he said yes. I asked him the question because he was making me laugh a lot, very funny guy (if you're reading this, i hope you don't mind), anyway i told him i'm sure his girlfriend has a great time with him because he'll be making her laugh a lot. And then he said it is possible he makes other people laugh and no matter how much clowning he does, if his girlfriend is not happy with him, she is not. Sadly, this is true for a lot of people, they can converse freely with other people, laugh with them but their relationships with their partners are going awry or lacking spice. How many times have relationships ended because of these reasons: "we have fallen out of love", "he does not appreciate me", "she does not respect me" etc. I think i know some ingredients for a loving and lasting relationship. I haven't been at this long enough i know, i only got married 6 months ago but i was in a relationship that lasted 6 years and ended in marriage to my wonderful husband. There are principles which do not change over time and i'd like to share them.

Here are some tips i think are important for a wonderful and loving relationship:

* Laugh together - Laugh at yourselves, there are things that happen everyday that we can choose to laugh about. Joke about your mistakes, don't be touchy...Just look enough you will see reasons to laugh.

* Avoid criticism- You really don't have to mention everything that goes wrong, criticism kills a relationship. Find loving ways to communicate correction (note i said correction not criticism). Human beings generally do not like being corrected, the only way it's palatable is when we're sure the other person is looking out for our interest and is not proving superior.

*Pray together- An old saying goes "a family that prays together stays together", i guess that says it all.

*Give gifts- "You can give without loving, you cannot love without giving". Your gifts don't need to be expensive, the thought does it for most people especially if you're like me.

*Spice it up- Don't be dry, find interesting things to do with each other and share some interests. Your own interest might be watching movies together, do it as often as you can, it might be swimming, just think of anything you can do together for fun.

*Respect- Respect, i beg to differ is not domination!! Respect according to the dictionary in simple terms is the condition of being esteemed or honored. The other person wants to feel like you value them. Show some respect. If you're married, don't invite guests over without notifying your spouse, it shows a sign of disrespect. The first time some people hear of something going on with their partner is when their friends say it to their hearing. Show some respect for each other! Always ask yourself before doing something, will it honour or show esteem for my partner? And women, massage the guy's ego. Every man likes to feel he's in charge, i know it's hard in these days of "girl power" but hey, what's most important to you: emancipation or a loving lasting relationship?

*Be open- Don't keep secrets. Try to be each other's best friends. It might be hard initially but it will get easier as you practise this and go a long way in making a wonderful relationship.

*Be committed- Falling in love is a wonderful feeling, a euphoric feeling which you want to have forever. You catch the guy's eyes on the other side of the room and current passes all over your body...girl believe me, this only lasts so much time! The reason most people claim to have fallen out of love is they they think love is that gooey feeling. I'm not saying the feeling will not be there but sometimes you won't have it...Love is most importantly a commitment!

These are a few tips, i could go on and on but they will all revolve around these few theories i guess. Most importantly, the bible teaches us a lot about love and if you're interested you can model 1Cor 13 :4-7 in your relationship, you will never have to fall out of love if you follow the principles stated there. This portion of scriptures says:
Love is patient, love is kind.It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Just ponder on those verses, do you think that with them you could ever go wrong in love? I sincerely doubt.
Falling in love is a wonderful thing, being in love is great and staying in love is awesome! It's like old wine, it gets better with the years.
I'm grateful i have found love and i thank God for giving me a husband who teaches me to love daily. Thanks baby, you're the best! To those of you who are still looking for love, i pray you find it and if you have found it, i pray for the grace to hold on to it and be able to stay.